Heh, suffice to say I am feeling Ok, at the moment. I admit that yesterday in particular, there were a lot of little things which were doing their best to bring me down, I managed to hang on till now and things are better.
I just ran talked through the talk for another rough time. This afternoon I turned the pages into overheads and they looked ok, I still haven't timed it, so I don't know whether to slow down much.
I'm feeling relatively comfortable, today again little things tried to spoil my mood, but I didn't let them… much. I saw my new Toad room (two words - broom closet), got the car washed and vacuumed and so on, got my hair done, bought a little cheap laser pointer, got the group meeting out of the way (mostly painless) and so on.
Yesterday my stress was elevated by car problems, and finding this out…
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Monday - Day 1
8:00-9:30 S15-2.23
Registration
9:30- 10:00 Introduction. Rachel Pattison
Member of the Wiradjuri, Gloria Marshall to officially open the conference
10:15- 12:00 Plenary Session
Youth Forum
Steph - "Transgendered Youth - Unique experiences in a queer context".
Carl Coulson- Relevance of the bear movement to Australian queer youth
Sean Wilson - Queer youth in rural areas
12:00-1:00 Lunch
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Yes, there I am. First speaker on the morning of the first day. I know it is quite an honor as everyone will still be interested and present, but still, it didn't do much at the time for my already stretched nerves. Peta G came around last night and must have though that I couldn't deal with stress worth a damn. ;)
But, things are thankfully settling down. The main problem was that I had stupid little things which I am/was obligated to attend. The group meeting was an irrelevance, the B.B.Q. this weekend is a pain and an inconvenience, but I have to be there.
Tomorrow Dad will be coming over to take my big pieces of junk home. I will sanitize to some degree, but having my wardrobe as is, what can one do? I hope things will be fine… ask no questions, get no unpleasant answers…
Apart from that, I need to have a shave, pack, fiddled with the overheads (adding colour, making smooth lead-in's) and I hope things will be Ok. The trip will be interesting, I haven't been to Bathurst since 1986. I went to some youth type camps there (presumably to prepare me for the shock of boarding school) and so I have been around the University, maybe I will have some interesting flash-backs. ;)
Whilst at the hair-dressers, I picked up a pamphlet which listed a whole bunch of "Adult Education" type courses. I was intrigued, and have now almost (I need to find an envelope) enrolled. I signed up for a Singing workshop, and "The Dee Jay school". Singing-type lessons I hope will help with my voice, and also to get some confidence. Learning how to DJ is something I've always wished to learn about since Jules D introduced me to my first real Techno album two and a half years ago. The courses start at the beginning of August, so hopefully by then I'll have other stuff out of the way and time available. I'm really looking forward to it.
Toad… the main problem I see at the moment, is not the size of the room, but the lack of a sink or even a mirror. A mirror is easily rectified, however I need a sink so that I can shave in private. It's hard if people to continue to think I am a girl if I am in the bathroom smearing on shaving cream. This coupled with the fact that the reduction in Androcur means my top lip has some returned black hairs, means the issue of electrolysis becomes increasingly important.
10:45 pm - I think I'd better get some sleep, I've been up too long.
11:00 pm - Sanitizing i.e. removing the most "in-your-face" elements before arrival of ones parents, is a tiresome task at the best of times. Not including when you're partially dismantling your room and are often not sure whether you should open "that" cupboard door. ;)