7:15 pm - Friday 21st July 2000

Today has been a long, frustrating, occasionally burning-anger kind of day…

Which is to say that it wasn't the best…

I'm not sure what it is about Friday's, but the last couple I've had have really sucked. The week that was…

Wednesday - One week post-psych and I'm still turning it over in my mind. Coffee with the usual gang, and even Lloyd turned up, it was not too cliquey, but I can handle that.
That night I went out for dinner with R*** who's a nice enough guy, but not really my type. Still with my limited social circles it was nice to get out and after that we went to see "Trick" at Tilley's. This was part of the queer film group series, and the place was absolutely packed with gay guys. I didn't feel uncomfortable, but maybe slightly out of place. After the film was over I had a good old chat with some of the people who are still at Johns and had a good laugh.

Thursday - Michelle phoned me early in the morning, and we spent most of the rest of the day together. The ANU scavenger hunt was on and Michelle was part of one of the teams, so it was an interesting day. It was really great to catch up with her and just hang out together.
I took a few photos, didn't do much work and that was about it.

Friday - The last real working day of the week, and another day which put my teeth on edge for whatever reason. I got "Sex Changes" by Pat Califia from the library and had a very hard time reading the section dealing with Raymond's famous hate-piece "The Transsexual Empire". That set my teeth on edge, and I cam back into the office from the lab to run into a conversation on "Why would homosexuals come to Canberra?" which quickly died off my supervisors lips when I rounded the corner.
I spent the rest of the day fighting the urge to basically say "Don't you f**king judge me, you'll never go through what I have to endure." Thankfully I didn't spit that lot in his face, I was (barely) able to control myself. I had been thinking about getting him to mention to the others that I prefer Steph to Steve, but I didn't want to think where such a conversation might lead when I had been put in such a mood.
I also crushed my bank account paying for accommodation and balancing my credit card (remember I am debt-phobic) *s*

I also booked a trial patch for the new laser down at John James hospital. This is part of Dr T***** cosmetic surgery clinic. It should be interesting, the trial is planned for Wednesday 26th June (next week) at 2 pm. I'll probably look at getting zapped on a Friday to give me the weekend to recover a little bit.

I've said this to myself for a long time, but one day I'll look back at the crucial phase of my transition and wonder "How the hell did I do it all on a student's stipend?"

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