4:30 pm - Saturday 26th August 2000

My it's been a busy last few days…

Thursday - A productive day in the laboratory, I guess I was just in the mood and feeling good for no particular reason. In the afternoon was my facial which was nice and relaxing. The only problem was that exfoliation exposed some hairs and they had to subsequently be shaved off later, but still it was very relaxing. I didn't get back to work, instead I went home and then down to the DJ workshop in Phillip which was good fun, we did beat-juggling. I then dropped around to Susan and Jules's house, but Susan had gone off to the Economics Ball, and so Jules and I did a quick supermarket and video run. I watched my first three Pokemon episodes. All I can say is that Team Rocket is cool. ;) I came home late and had to shave my legs.

Friday - Friday was yet another busy flat-out kind of day. Experimental and writing-up in the morning, and then boring, tedious Z-scan stuff over at Laser Physics in the afternoon. I finished at about 5:00 pm and came home.
Tonight of course was to be my meeting with this guy R***** who I had been chatting to on ICQ. I suppose I was fairly well dressed (for me) and I put on some make-up just because felt I should make the effort.
So, I walked over to the Canberra Center and burnt some time. I looked around near where we were supposed to meet up, and finally we met…

What can I say? Things went pretty well. No fireworks, but normality has a taste to it, and I think I might like it… We had coffee from about 6:45 pm until 9:00 pm in the Canberra Center, and then after that we walked down to the Casino for some drinks (of the alcoholic sort) until about 11:00 pm. It was nice, we talked virtually non-stop for the whole time, and my voice was a little sore by the end of it, but that was Ok. We made tentative plans for a "next time' and then I caught a taxi home.
So, what can I say? He's a nice guy, no supermodel but smart, I don't know whether it will go much further, but he didn't scream or run away so I'm presuming I did Ok. After five hours or so of talking with an otherwise complete stranger seems to confirm what I had suspicions of before… that I pass.

But then again, I think I pass to a certain degree, maybe… Hmmm… say greater than 75% of the time? Not that 1 person out of every 4 picks me, but rather that it's not 100%. Still, I think I'm doing fairly well… however nothing a bit of plastic surgery and some voice training couldn't enhance…

9:00 pm - So, here I sit, I'm not going out or anything, but for me that's fine.

So, I've been chatting on ICQ to a close non-TS friend. I specify non-TS because of what her opinion was, i.e. that I was wrong in not disclosing myself. I admit, that I'm not completely comfortable with people not knowing that I'm TS, but I know that there is a good reason for this… because I don't want to live a life of rejection and disdain.

You know, everyone I've met so far who knows me has said "It's not a problem that you're a transsexual". Of course it's not a problem for them, because I'm unlikely to end up in their bed...
It doesn't matter if I'm the most wonderful person on earth, if people know me as "Steph the transsexual" before they get to know me as "Steph the person", the potential for any meaningful relationship is zero...

Straight guys gets freaked out by me, lesbians don't like me, straight girls aren't interested in me, doesn't leave much choice does it now. *sigh*

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