9:00 pm - Tuesday 27th February 2000

Lots of stuff to catch up on.

Copernicus dislodged the earth from the centre of mankind's universe (metaphorically, not literally). On a similar yet opposite view I have always known that I am a very average tranny in a relative back-water of an obscure country. Tranny's come in every possibly variation just like every member of society, the beautiful, the plain, the young, the old, the smart, the unlucky, all the disparate elements which make society and which make transsexuals a reflection of the wider society in which they live. But they are transsexuals and so face the same potential list of problems, stealth, disclosure, being outed and a dozen different similar threads uniting them in an unlikely sorority (or fraternity as the case maybe). No matter how beautiful someone may be, they still often can't get married, or adopt, or face other greater hurdles towards leading a "normal" life. This is the great leveler, I often ask myself how many IQ point I'd trade to be pretty, I know I've traded some already for the effects of hormones, but I'm like most people, I'm greedy and want to get as much as possible for as little down-side as possible.

It's been fairly hectic, but more unpleasantly it's been hot (~35C) there was a storm tonight thankfully. Illara sent me some CD's and I'm listening to "Human Drama" which is Ok. I've also looked at some of the photos of her friends which perhaps inspired the above meanderings.

It's been such a hectic week, I still don't think I've recovered properly. Market Day Wednesday, Champagne Breakfast Thursday, Meridian Club Saturday and then catching up on sleep Sunday and a meeting tonight. I need hard-core relaxation. Saturday night I got home at 3 am, got to sleep at 6 am and woke up about 9 am or so and was totally written off for the rest of the day.

Work has been slow, and I'm trying to work on this paper and making minimal progress. It's almost ready to hand over, but I know I should pick through it, but perhaps I'll feel better handing it over. No point working it to perfection when my supervisor will slaughter it with a red pen.

Mum will be coming over on Sunday as a slightly early birthday hello. We'll probably go window-shopping and do lunch which will be nice. Yesterday Red was at Uni getting a reference and we dropped by God's for coffee. After chatting for a fair while, Heather and then bridget turned up, and I was very happy to see Bridget since she'd been in Italy for the Xmas holidays. Later that night a whole bunch of us did dinner at Little Saigon which was very nice and a few of us went to P.J.'s after for a drink. It was good to see everyone again and catch up, but it keeps reminding me I need to put my foot to the accelerator when it comes to my thesis. Sooner is always better.

In other matters, I continue to be made aware of the limitations of my body, not merely what is not on my chest, but what is between my legs. *sigh* I hate that, I would get surgery tomorrow if it were possible, but it's not so I have to live with that for an indeterminate period of time.

There's been lots going on, but at the moment I either am too tired or don't want to talk about it. I need good sleep, maybe after the rain that will be tonight.

9:15 am - Addendum : Getting dressed this morning, I felt I had to give myself a bit more credit than being just average. ;) Besides, beauty fades but I'll always have a Doctorate.

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