Legacies are unavoidable. Indeed, they are desirable. Some are 'good' others 'bad' perhaps, but both are still needed.

I think of the brave pioneers who went before me who made it possible for me to find a space, claim t as mine, and then to make that space a home-space. From the earliest peoples to colonize these ands through the friend's brother who went to the U.S. and sent us images of this landscape and its ife, and others -- all have been my personal pioneers as well. They opened up new vistas.

Having come to this country, i inherit the legacies of those who went before me -- the political andscape, the cultural mores, and yes, the earlier indian graduate students whose standards i had to eet or excel while also setting my own for the others who would follow me. In this milieu, over time, found my comfort in all those elements of the landscape i could acclimate to and 'successfully' use to reate my own private space: distinct from the space all around mine, distinct from the private spaces f all the other millions around me, and still part of the vast continuity where all these millions of rivate spaces exist. i, too, am a pioneer.

The shaping of this space is never done. But, i have a fair sense of where this home is, what i have in it, and what i like/dislike in it.

Could i have done it without the pioneers' legacies?

Could i have done it without being a pioneer myself?

No.

I think of those who went before me on another landscape into which i have immigrated. These were the pioneers who came out, who proclaimed, and claimed as their birthright, their gay/lesbian identities. They had profound impacts on the inner and the outer landscapes -- each influencing the other. Into this milieu of the likes of Stonewall, i have immigrated and find that there are others out there who have spaces similar, albeit not identical, to my own.

The 'khush' landscape where i find myself stepping tentatively, like a curious child on unfamiliar territory, is itself a most vibrant and powerful landscape. The pioneers of landscapes of the American gay/lesbian people, opened up a landscape where the pioneers of 'khush' space planted the flag and started shaping a new part of the landscape. Into this, they brought with them their identities, experiences, legacies, vision, fears and hopes, determination and doubt ... The landscape thus shaped offers a larger context, a super-space, in which many a south asian gay/lesbian and their friends/relatives have made home-spaces for themselves. The homesteading continues on this dynamic landscape. The landscape's values need to be nurtured and never lost from sight.

That we would even dare explore this inner terra incognita is in no small measure due to the pioneers who came out. And then faced the consequences. These stories are still around, contemporary.

Always pioneering -- every life is a different story in its details, details which shape us who shape the landscape which we leave for others to immigrate to, or should i say, _pioneer_, with _their_ details ...

As i think of these pioneers, i find myself thanking them for all the lessons they have left behind -- both the 'how-to' and the 'how-not-to.' Where they are not useful, we have to re-shape the strategy of our pioneering. Where they are useful, we can potentially improve further.

Regardless, we can go _forward_, progress from strength to strength.

If we forget the pioneers who went before us, we are doomed.

If we forget the immigrants who will follow us, we are doomed.

So are they.

Does it behoove us then, to practice anything less than that which will foster strength and compassion not only in each one of us, but our brethren as well?

The pioneers before us are immortal -- they are the landscape they left us.

Such can be our immortality too.

Only if we love and can practice what the saint exhorts:

'Atmavadeva parAnapi pashyata'

"Look upon others also as thine own self."

-- Chandra.



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