To say the least, this has proven to be an interesting summer. I've gone from virtually a closeted cross-dresser to going out to dinner in full feminine attire. We attended our first Vals meeting in May. Just about everyone at that meeting commented on how scared both of us appeared. This was the first time my S.O. had ever been anywhere with Cheryl Ann in our 24 years of marriage. It took me days of planning and about 3 hours of preparation to get dressed for that first meeting. Everyone made us feel very welcome and secure, however, I know my knees never stopped shaking. I can only say one thing for sure about that meeting. It didn't kill me and we have gone back. I'm not sure I remember to much else about the evening.

We were unable to make the June meeting and it is probably just as well. I think we both needed the time to adjust a little to the new frontier that had opened up for us. She needed time to adjust and I needed the time to sort through my feelings and decide if this was the right thing for Cheryl Ann. Dressing at home is a safe sphere to operate within. Now, to go out in public dressed as female exposes one to all sorts of possibilities. What happens if I get stopped on the drive? What happens if there is an accident? Do I have the courage to really do this? Is there a REAL good reason to do it? As I wrestled with these questions, I only knew that no matter what was ahead the emptiness that lay behind was worse.

July's meeting was typical of the meetings as it turned out. A little social time before the business meeting and then a little social time after the meeting to mingle and get to know the other members. I did get a chance to talk with a few of the other Vals and began to ease the fears that I suspect just about anyone would have when first meeting a new group of people. We were asked to go out to dinner with a few of the members after the meeting. The one word that describes how I handled the invitation was "Chicken". I declined as graciously as I could and we left the meeting so I could go change into something a little more traditional (blah).

The August meeting arrives and we both talked about going with the group to dinner this time if the invitation is extended again. Nervously, we accepted the invitation to be part of the group for dinner. A local establishment was chosen for dinner. As we drove towards downtown, I had some dive pictured in my mind. When we drove up I nearly died a second death. This is not some dive, it's a regular restaurant with regular clientele. I still don't know how I mustarded up the courage to go in that night. There I stood el-al-a-fem, the waiter walked over and calmly said, "This way ladies." The nine of us were escorted to a table just like anyone else would have been. I know that guy knew some of these ladies were not as they appeared. He never blinked an eye all night, treated us just like any other lady in the place. It was not real crowded that night. There was a big football game going on at the stadium. The patrons never seemed to pay any of us any attention. I don't even think I ever saw the first stare or jester our way. This came as a little bit of a surprise. Our group was not loud, except maybe for the outfits, we all just minded our own business and had a heck of a good time.

It's now September and off to Nashville we go again. This time we have arranged to meet one of the couples from the Vals on Saturday afternoon before the meeting. Each of us was looking for the others spouse, this is the only way we could recognize the right couple since neither Danielle or I were in or feminine role at this time. We must have sat and just talked for 2 hours. This was a very pleasant time, a chance to tallk openly about cross-dressing or anything else and just relax with some fine individuals. The meeting that night was interesting. We had a good round table discussion and some thoughtful opinions were expressed. The sharing that goes on at the meetings is always great. We decided to go out to dinner afterwards again. This time it would just be two couples. Off to the same restaurant we headed with not a care in the world. Huh, the place is a little more crowed tonight. Oh well, nothing happened last time, just mind my own business and go ahead. The waiter was the same one as before and seated us at the same table even. This time however, we had patrons on both sides of us. A table of college coeds on one side and four couples at the other two tables surrounding us. To say the least I was nervous again. Those giggling girls drove me crazy, although, they never looked our way or anything. I don't think they really paid us any attention at all. It was just that giggling all night. The stares came off and on from the other couples around us. I wanted to tell one lady to shut her mouth, its not polite to stare, but I didn't. We got through the evening, had a nice dinner and went back to out motel. The next morning we meet Danielle and her spouse for breakfast. They are certainly very nice people and we both enjoy their company.

Since that first meeting, in May, my wardrobe has swollen unbelievably thanks to the gracious efforts of my wife. The sincere help she has offered in this area is remarkable considering how close we nearly came to ending this relationship just a few months earlier. I can not adequately express the love I feel toward this lovely lady and for the support she has offered. We move forward a little every day and have made a pledge never to close the door to open communications between us. I know this is the single biggest reason we are still together. She is still not fond of Cheryl Ann, however, we both are trying to learn how to handle and deal with day to day life around this issue. To anyone reading this, always strive to find a way to have good open and honest communications with you significant other around this issue. If you don't you are doomed to failure for sure.

Cheryl Ann

Sep. 1997