My Life and Welcome to it!

A kindly, childless couple found me and raised me as their own. My new mother ran a clothing store and that's where I fell in love with dresses and everything that goes with them. Fortunately for me, when I was very young, my Mom thought I looked cute in dresses and makeup.

Of course, because I'd always been treated this way by my Mom, I didn't give dressing up a second thought. It wasn't until I was about to go to school that things changed. All of a sudden, Dad started to demand that I dress like a boy. Even Mom started to change her attitude. All of a sudden, I had to start hiding my wardrobe and dressing in secret.

When I got to school, the principal told me I had to play with the boys instead of talking to and playing with the girls at recess.

Eventually, not being stupid, I figured out that the way to get along was to go along. I played all the sports, teased the girls and made girl jokes, learned how to make rude body noises. In short, I became an ultra-male orangutan. But, still, I knew the truth.

That truth is, I love women. I love the way they look, the way they move, the way they sound and smell ... everything about them. I've been through the confusion of whether or not I want to be female. I've decided that, while I'm curious and would love to experience many things as a woman would (sex, childbirth, the close friendships only women seem to develop), I really enjoy my male side as well. To resolve this duality (being a Gemini, I'm used to resolving duality) I've learned to enjoy my feminine side through dressing when I get the opportunity. The rest of the time I enjoy being a guy with a lovely wife and two adult children (we wanted one of each but decided to stop with a boy and a girl).

Most of all, I've learned that it's important to have a sense of humour. Unless something phenomenal comes out of the Human Genome Project very soon, I will not be able to have everything I want. I will have to pick a gender and live with it (I'd like to be able to change back and forth as my mood changed.) I could let society's treatment of orangs like me make me sullen. I could get on some bandwagon and try to force the world to change and see things my way. Or I can milk all the joy and fun I can out of the life I've got. I salute the effort and admire the energy of those who are out to change the world. I plan to enjoy myself and hope that an example of a fun-loving, reasonably well-adjusted, orangutan can help others feel comfortable with the choices that they have had to make in their lives.

Gorilla's just want to have fun! (And so do other primates!)