Lube & Ejaculation

WET OR DRY?

Some guys like to masturbate with some kind of lubrication between their hand and penis, while others do not. One factor to consider is whether or not you're circumcised. If you're uncircumcised, and therefore have some extra skin on your penis to move up and down along the shaft, you can simply grab on firmly and pump away, rolling the sleeve of skin that covers your penis back and forth over the shaft. This will cause your "foreskin" (the sleeve of skin that surrounds the penis head) to move back and forth across the head of your penis, producing a great feeling. If you're circumcised, you can either "go dry" or "go wet." In the dry technique, you either grip firmly onto your penis and make the most of the mobility of the top layer of skin, or you grip lightly and slide across the surface of your penis with your fingers. The downside to this second option is your penis is more likely to get sore, and you can't enjoy the incredible feeling of a really tight grip moving up and down the shaft. For this reason, many guys -- including some uncircumcised ones -- prefer to masturbate "wet."

One common form of lubrication is spit -- it's always in supply. (Except, perhaps, when you start getting really excited and your mouth dries out!) Another method is to masturbate in the shower or bathtub with soap or shampoo. This works okay -- but if any soap gets into the hole at the end of your penis, it really stings! Plus, soap or shampoo can irritate the skin if you do it for a while. Alternatively, petroleum jelly (Vaseline) works, but it's greasy and doesn't allow your hand to move very fast. Baby oil also works, but it's messy to clean up and leaves stains easily. Hand lotion, like Vaseline Intensive Care, is very popular and works well. But perhaps water-based "personal lubricants," like K-Y Jelly and Astroglide, work the best. K-Y Jelly can be found in drugstores or supermarkets, usually near condoms or feminine-protection products; it comes in a form that looks like a tube of toothpaste. These personal lubricants have just the right consistency for great masturbation at any grip or speed, and they clean up easily with a towel.

There is one problem with many water-based lubricants, though: they dry out. If you masturbate for 20 minutes, you have to keep re-applying the lube, and eventually the stuff thickens up into goop. If that starts to happen, put a little spit on your penis, or dribble a few drops of water onto it. That will wake the lube right up, and you'll be at it full-force again! If you really want to be efficient, make a mixture of water and lube and keep it by your bed. Whenever your hand starts to dry out, add some of the mixture. You can masturbate worry-free all night long with this technique! The trick, though, is to make your concoction with just the right combination of water and lube. Too much water and the jelly will start to wash away; two little and it'll eventually start to gunk up.

Some modern personal lubricants are formulated to dry out slower or not at all. For masturbation, this has obvious benefits.

As you get further into your masturbation session and start to get a little more excited, a small amount of fluid (commonly called "pre-cum") might ooze out of the end of your penis. This is normal. Some boys actually get enough "pre-cum" going that they can use it for lubrication.

WHAT SHOULD I BE DOING WITH THE OTHER HAND?

If you're right-handed, the classic thing to do with your left hand while masturbating is to hold or rub your testicles (TES-ti-culls, commonly called "balls" or "nuts"). It's also fun to let your hand go roving over your body, as you find new places to stimulate or tickle while giving yourself pleasure.

HOW FAST SHOULD I GO? HOW TIGHTLY SHOULD I GRIP?

As fast and as tight as you want! Every guy is different -- some like to go slowly, and some like to go very fast; some like it loose, and some like it tight. You might decide you like to start out slow and loose and then speed up and squeeze tight, or you might do just the opposite.

You may not have a very interesting masturbation session if you just stare at your hand going up and down your penis. Experienced masturbators know it's fun to lie back, close your eyes, and think of sexy things. Your fantasies can have no limits -- anything goes. Even something you would never do or want to do in real life can be something to fantsize about while masturbating. Let your imagination run wild!

BUT I CAN'T EJACULATE!

If you already know how to masturbate, you might think nobody needs to be told how to do it -- but we're amazed how many guys have trouble the first time they try. They read JackinHow-To, they proceed to masturbate for 15 or 20 minutes, and then they get bored and give up. If this is you, you're doing it wrong! Turn off the TV or the Super Nintendo -- believe it or not, masturbation is serious business and demands your full attention if you want to go "all the way" with it. (And as anyone who's ejaculated will tell you, it's the only way to go.)

Masturbation with the intent to orgasm is about building up the stimulation over time until your body can't take it anymore. A lot of it is mental, though -- you need to concentrate on the feelings you're producing. Close your eyes and think of the sexiest person or situation you can imagine. It helps if this "fantasy" of yours corresponds to the physical feelings you're experiencing -- for example, you can imagine that your super-sexy person is masturbating you. Also, try moving your pelvis around, contracting your butt muscles rhythmically as if you were actually having sex; this helps your body to "get into it."

Remember: If you're still in your early teens, you may be too young to ejaculate. If that's the case, you may still have an orgasm -- but it probably won't be as intense as it will be when you're older. You just have to be patient and wait for your body to develop more.

THE BUILDUP

As you masturbate, the feelings of pleasure and stimulation will start to intensify. Go with it -- but if you want to get the most from your session, don't let things happen too fast. In order to prolong the pleasure, you might want to stop for a minute now and then to give your penis (and your arm) a rest. Besides being fun, this is actually a very good exercise for later. When you have intercourse, you will be a better sex partner if you can delay your ejaculation to maximize your partner's pleasure, and time it so you reach orgasm at the right moment. This also gives you a better feel for knowing what your body feels like when you're close to orgasm.

Your feelings will build more rapidly if you bear down by rhythmically contracting the muscles inside your pelvis -- the same ones that control your bladder. Eventually, as those muscles get stronger (they'll probably be getting plenty of exercise!), you'll develop much better control over them -- but for now, you can use them as a kind of "gas pedal" to make those feelings stronger and stronger.

THE EJACULATION

The act of rubbing your penis naturally makes you more and more excited, like a runaway train speeding down a hill. As you think a particulary sexy thought, you will begin to get a hot feeling inside your pelvis, which will increase in intensity. You'll probably feel a little like you're about to urinate -- but don't worry, that's just the feeling of semen beginning to enter your urethra (the tube that runs through your penis). In fact, you are physically unable to urinate at this moment. Do not stop! Keep squeezing and stroking, and just savor the feelings. Stopping at the wrong point can actually be somewhat uncomfortable -- even painful. If the pleasure starts to get a little too intense, slow down or weaken your grip rather than stop. (Later on, you'll get used to this intense pleasure and will probably want to maximize it by going faster and tighter.) Just remember that as long as you continue to rub well past ejaculation, you'll be fine -- in fact, you'll be great!

When you reach the point just before ejaculation, the muscles in your body will start to stiffen up, you'll probably make some funny faces, and then a series of waves of muscle contractions will take over your pelvis. At the same time, it will feel like a lightning bolt of electricity is going through your brain, and every nerve in your body will tingle, alive with energy. You may even cry out or moan involuntarily (something to consider if there are other people in the house). A teaspoon or two of semen -- a thick, whitish fluid that looks a little like salad dressing -- will come out of your penis. It might just dribble out, but if you're a little older (like 14 or 15 or more), it will probably shoot out with some force, perhaps flying a foot or two through the air. Three to eight of these squirts will occur quickly, but you won't care -- you'll be feeling better than you've ever felt before, guaranteed! After five or ten seconds, the semen will stop coming out, and you'll return to earth. Your penis will probably get very sensitive, so you won't want to rub anymore, and you might suddenly become very un-horny. You'll lie there breathing very heavily for a minute or two, your heart pounding.

Congratulations -- you just masturbated for the first time!

AFTERWARDS

When you're lying there with wet semen on your stomach, you'll probably want to clean it up fairly soon -- especially if there's any chance someone will walk in on you. Just wipe it up with a Kleenex or a piece of toilet paper. (Depending on how much you ejaculated, you might need between one and three feet of toilet paper.) It's a lot easier to flush a Kleenex rather than to use a towel or T-shirt, which will need to get washed and may be noticed by someone in the mean time (this can be embarrassing, obviously). If you're so inclined, you can also eat your semen. This might sound disgusting, but it's actually perfectly safe -- although you may or may not like the taste. (For health reasons, you shouldn't eat anyone else's semen.)

Usually, after a male ejaculates, he loses his erection and goes through a period of time when he isn't interested in getting aroused again. In fact, he may be unable to get an erection during this time. However, depending on a number of factors, you might be able to start up again after a few minutes, or even immediately. If you want to and it's convenient, go right ahead! Never let guilty thoughts get in the way of giving yourself pleasure; there's absolutely no reason to have them. Remember -- don't ever stop having fun with your body!