Index

What Do Women Want?
Why spend your time with other guys trying to guess what's going on in the minds of women? To make your life easier -- and put your mind and body at peace -- we present the Men's Fitness Online sex survey, the first in a series of surveys on this subject area. We asked several women, aged 24 to 34, to sit down with us to answer the questions we all wonder about. Here's what goes on in their minds regarding men.

Height Question: What percentage of your attraction to a man is based on his physical looks?
Answer: Our group put physical looks high on their list, though there was a small group of women who held on to the idea that looks aren't everything.

Q. What physical turn-ons and turn-offs affect your opinion of a potential mate?
A. Turn-ons: Good hygiene and a lean, athletic, muscular, powerful build were the two most popular turn-ons. Other desirable attributes, in no particular order:

  • Chiseled features with "kissable, luscious lips," as well as nicely defined arms and strong shoulders .
  • Lots of hair on the head and not the body. However, some believed certain face shapes look better with facial hair than without.
  • Clean, well-groomed hair and nails .
  • Good, tasteful dresser .
  • Height. Most women preferred men who are at least 6' tall.
  • Confidence, a winning smile, sparkling eyes and a sense of humor were included as absolutely necessary traits.

    Turn-offs: Excessive body hair -- from nose hair to five-o'clock shadows or back hair -- was the biggest thumbs-down for our ladies. Other turn-offs:

  • Bad teeth, breath, style and cologne all fought for the second-most-common complaint.
  • Beer bellies, tubbiness, love handles, or being more than 20 pounds overweight were grounds for dismissal
  • Being too skinny also doesn't score you many points
  • An unkempt appearance, such as greasy hair, dress shirts without undershirts, body odor, etc.
  • Wearing too much jewelry, having elaborately coifed hair or being too tan. One comment: "I don't like dating luggage."

    To sum up, pay careful attention to grooming and fitness from head to toe. If you must keep the long hair, goatee or both, make sure they're clean and well-trimmed. Also, please trim your toe nails and, if you can't see your feet to do so, head to the gym.

    For more information on body hair removal options, and a more detailed survey of body hair likes and dislikes, pick up the July issue of Men's Fitness.

    Places Q. Where do you go to meet men or, do you prefer to meet men by chance?
    A.     "I don't go anywhere for the express purpose of hunting and gathering," said Jennifer, 25. Chance is the major factor in most of our participants mate-meetings. They do not go to bars or clubs to meet men, so if you've been frequenting these watering holes and going home empty-handed, this might enlighten you a little.
         Many said they usually meet men unexpectedly. Some felt it was nice to spy someone you're interested in browsing through the book or record store; that way, you can get an idea of their interests. In general, most felt that meeting a guy through any other channel besides friends is a high risk. "I approach all strange guys, no matter where we are, as if they were potential ax murderers," said Rachel, 28. The best ways to meet women would be through mutual acquaintances or participatory activities you both enjoy. Take a rock climbing class, a yoga class, or tai chi. Enroll in a class or two at the local college. Most of all, chat up those women friends you have and get them to comb their rolodexes for compatible friends to recommend you to.

    Pamper Q. Do you like a man who caters to your every wish -- doing your laundry, cleaning your cat box, painting your toe nails -- or would you rather have a relationship with someone who says no to your more unreasonable requests, thereby garnering your respect?
    A.     Most of our respondents prefer a 50/50 relationship. They like a little pampering, but are fully prepared to give it back. Catering to their every need is too smothering. Little, unexpected favors are nice.
         "If a guy is a pushover, I lose interest," said Elaine, 30. Being independent women of the nineties, they don't want to be babied, but they do expect equal contributions to the relationship. So when she asks you to do something, don't ask "Right now?" Remember all those little things she does for you. But if you are doing too much, be careful not to appear needy. Desperate actions drive women away.

    Q. Who usually initiates sex in your relationships and how do you feel about that arrangement?
    A.     Most of our respondents say sex initiation is fairly equal. A couple women felt they were always initiating sex and wished their partner would do more. Others said the man usually gets the ball rolling, and are happy with that. Generally, the women whose relationships were more equally balanced in the bedroom, felt they had a more easy and open relationship with their partner, which makes the sex even more enjoyable.
         In all cases, though, spontaneity is key to keeping a relationship fresh. New times, new places and new ways. Don't allow yourself to become sedentary.

    --Ashlea Foster

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