COMING OUT!

I have lived all of my life in denial
Of who I really am...what I really want out of life
I lived in constant fear of the cruel consequences.
Fear of being found out
Of being discriminated against
Of not being accepted by the people I loved
So I just followed the easiest and safest route.
I have hidden my true self for so many years
Living a life that was shallow and based on lies
Hiding behind a marriage that caused me many tears
Never a day passed without me asking the why's.
I knew that my ex-hubby would make my life pure hell
He said that he would destroy me and he finally got his wish
Destroying me was not enough….he tried to take my kids as well!
He has caused us all a great deal of pain and anguish!
That man has told all of my friends... all of my family
And to what gain???
What purpose did it serve to tell them about me?
I did my best and have wondered many times if it was all in vain?
It has been two long years since I came out.........
I had two wonderful years with a person who I absolutely adored
She said that her love for me was very strong
But...alas...even that was not meant to be!
She discovered that she had been wrong!
So even though I am alone again
I have only this to say.....
Despite the anguish, the fear, the threats and the pain...
I finally have come out of hiding...
I have shed my past...
and I am at long last
ME!

composed by Mackie