Stats
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Stats |
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The most obvious characteristic of a bear is under standibly his facial fur. So, that is the most logical place to begin. Using a capital "B" to denote "BEAR", we have added a sub-class characterizing "beard type" which combines a bear's beard's length, thickness, and overall "keptness", numbered from 0 to 9 and defined in the following way.
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Classification Scheme: |
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f - "The FUR factor". Some bears are particularly hairy about the rest of their bodies, others INCREDIBLY furry, yet others though rightfully bears, have little or no fur on their chests, arms, legs, back, butt, etc. |
f = furry in a bearish sense |
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g - "the GROPE factor": This is the amount one likes to be touched or pawed etc. |
g++ = Love to grope/paw/touch etc. Will attack without warning. Gives hugs to hot otherwise unknown bears on the street in open daylight. Outgoing with ursine affection, a little more reserved about place/person... |
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k - "the KINKY factor"... for those who dare. |
k = Open minded. Might choose SOME things on the "menu" |
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m - "The MUSCLE factor"... for those who like meat on them bones. |
m = some definition/blue collar |
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r - "The RUGGED/OUTDOOR factor". |
r++ = "Grizzly Adams" |
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q - "The *Q* factor (ahem)" |
q = for bears who are out - WAY out - and love every minute of it. Stereotypes be damned, break out the chiffon and everything else, because girlfriend, as Auntie Mame says "Life is a banquet and most poor bastards are starving to death!" (For the stunned reading this - yes, Virginia, "q" is a GOOD thing just like "t-- and t++ are GOOD things", "w-- and w++ are GOOD things"; nothing negative should be associated with the *labels* pertaining to classification!) |
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s - "SEX (ok, SLUT) factor. |
s = In SOME people's bear codes, "s" might really mean "k" |
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w - "the WEIGHT factor". For those who perfer their bears more or less fluffy. |
w = bear with a tummy |
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t - "the TALLNESS factor". To describe bears that are tall or short for their frame. |
t = tall but not very tall |
