On the morning show at a radio station
in Chicago they play a game
for prizes usually vacations and such,
called "Mate Match." The DJ's
ring someone at work and ask if they are
married or in a serious
relationship.
If yes, then this person is asked 3 very
personal questions that vary
from couple to couple and asked for their
significant others name and
work phone number. If the significant
other answers correctly then they
are winners.
This particular day it got interesting:
DJ: HEY! This is Edgar on WBAM. Do you know "Mate Match"?
Contestant:(laughing) Yes I do.
DJ: What is your name? First only please.
Contestant: Brian
DJ: Are you married or what Brian?
Brian: Yes.
DJ:"Yes"? Does this mean your are married?.or what? Brian?
Brian: (laughing nervously) Yes I am married.
DJ: Thank you Brian. OK, now, what is your
wife's name?
First only please Brian.
Brian: Sara.
DJ: Is Sara at work Brian?
Brian: She is gonna kill me.
DJ: Stay with me here Brian! Is she at work?
Brian:(laughing) Yes she is.
DJ: All right then, first question: When was the last time you had sex?
Brian: She is gonna kill me.
DJ: BRIAN! Stay with me here man.
Brian: About 8 o'clock this morning.
DJ: Atta boy.
Brian:(laughing sheepishly) Well.
DJ: Number 2: How long did it last?
Brian: About 10 minutes.
DJ: Wow! You really want that trip huh?
No one would ever have said
that if there weren't
a trip at stake.
Brian: Yeah, it would be really nice.
DJ: OK. Final question: Where was it that
you had sex at 8 this
morning?
Brian: (laughing hard) I ummmmm...
DJ: This sounds good Brian where was it?
Brian: Not that it was all that great just
that her mom is staying with
us
for a couple of weeks and she was taking a shower at the
time.
DJ: Ooooooh, sneaky boy!
Brian: On the kitchen table.
DJ: "Not that great"? That is more adventurous
than the last hundred
times I have
done it. Anyway, (to audience) I will put Brian on
hold, get his
wife's work number and call her up. You listen to
this.
(Advertisements)
DJ: (to audience) Let's call Sara shall we? (touch tones*ringing*)
Clerk: Kinko's.
DJ: Hey, is Sara around there somewhere?
Clerk: This is she.
DJ: Sara, this is Edgar with WBAM. I have
been speaking with Brian for
a couple of hours now
Sara: (laughing) A couple of hours?
DJ: Well, a while anyway. He is also on
the line with us. Brian knows
not to give away any
answers or you lose. Soooooooo, do you know
the rules of "Mate
Match"?
Sara: No
DJ: Good.
Brian: (laughing)
Sara: (laughing) Brian, what the hell are you up to?
Brian: (laughing) Just answer his questions honestly OK?
Sara: Oh, Brian
DJ: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sara I will now ask
you 3 questions and if you
answer what Brian has
said then the 2 of you are off to Orlando
Florida at our expense.
This does include tickets to Disney World,
Sea World and tickets
to see the Orlando Magic play. Get it Sara?
SARA! GET IT Orlando
Magic, they are on strike Sara "helloooooo"
anyone home?!?!
Sara: (laughing hard) YES, yes.
Brian:(laughing)
DJ: All right, when did you have sex last Sara?
Sara: Oh God, Brian...this morning before Brian went to work.
DJ: What time?
Sara: About 8 I think. (sound effect) DING DING DING
DJ: Very good. Next question: How long did it last?
Sara: 12,15 minutes maybe.
DJ: hhmmmmm
Background voice in studio: That's close
enough. I am sure she
is trying not to harm his manhood.
DJ: Well, we will give you that one. Last
question: Where did you do
it?
Sara: OH MY GOD, BRIAN! You did not tell them did you?!?!
Brian: Just tell him honey.
DJ: What is bothering you so much Sara?
Sara: Well, It's just that my mom is vacationing with us and...
DJ: SHE SAW?!?!
Sara: BRIAN?!?!
Brian: NO, no I didn't...
DJ: Ease up there sister. Just messin' with your head. Your answer?
Sara: Dear Lord,..I cannot believe you told them this.
Brian: Come on honey it's for a trip to Florida.
DJ: Let's go Sara we ain't got all day. Where did you do it?
Sara: In the ass.
(long pause)
DJ: We will be right back.
(advertisements)
DJ: I am sorry for that ladies and gentlemen.
This is live radio and
these things do happen.
Anyway, Brian and Sara are off to lovely
Orlando, Florida.