Advanced Fellatio Techniques
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Advanced Fellatio Techniques and Secrets
FAQ/Information
When I published Advanced Cunnilingus Techniques and Secrets, I included a
comment about perhaps doing a fellatio counterpart. Well, I've gotten quite
a few requests, and demands, that follow through, especially with the How to
Swallow without it Tasting Bad part. So, OK, here it is...
On the other hand, it was the number of unsolicited questions on the subject
that caused me to write Advanced Anal Sex Techniques, for those of you who
want to know about that subject.
There are two ways one could become expert enough at fellatio to write this
page: By being really good at it, or by having been subjected to the
attentions of people who were even better at it. Consider me the latter.
As I've said before, the best part of sex is giving pleasure to your
partner. But #2 on my personal list, behind going down on my lover, is being
gone down upon myself. And I've had a couple of partners who were
mind-blowingly good at this. I made a point of learning what it is they did,
and how, as well as having simply learned what felt best on me.
Basic Guidelines
First, everything here is a generalization. "Most guys" means most guys, not
all guys. With that in mind...
* Most guys are very different than women, when it comes to what they
enjoy. With women, starting out very slowly is more important. With
guys, there is a much better chance that the guy will be impatient, and
there is most definitely a lower overall standard as to what most guys
will enjoy.
* When starting out, the best bet is to start slowly, and indirectly. Men
tend to be more visual than women, stereotypically, so part of taking
your time would include almost touching...kissing around the rest of
his body (depending on what's accessible under the circumstances),
caressing, but not necessarily actually touching his erotic zones, yet.
* When doing this, remember the "many guys get impatient" rule. The
longer you can drag out each step (while still making progress), the
better, but some guys don't want much of this at all, and if you pay
attention it should become obvious.
* Unfortunately, another general difference is that guys are less
expressive. This is a shame, because it keeps them from enjoying it as
much, as well as making it harder for you to tell what works with them.
I cases like that, talking about them perhaps being more expressive,
especially by telling them it excites you (hopefully this is true), is
the best bet...but only if your relationship (or their personality) is
secure enough to allow it.
* The other day, on Don & Mike (radio gods), a woman caller bragged that
her nickname was "eight seconds", meaning the time it took her to bring
a guy to orgasm from fellatio. While a sizable portion of guys do
actually like that, it is not the way to give the best orgasm. In fact,
it's the worst way. Remember that some guys do prefer it, though.
* See, the longer a guy is "tortured" (as one of the best fellatio
artists I know puts it), the stronger his orgasm will be. "Tortured"
means "kept sexually excited, and stimulated, but not actually allowed
to have an orgasm".
* DO NOT be afraid to use your hands. If he's not one of those
get-it-over-quick (GIOQ) types, there are many things you simply cannot
do with your mouth, but can with your hands. Specific techniques in the
advanced section.
* Even among eroginous zones, don't stick only to the penis. Some guys
have more sensitive nipples than most women, for example (I'm one of
those guys, in fact).
o The scrotum/gonads (I mostly use technical terms, just to keep
things consistent...I can write great erotic literature, but
that's not what this article's about) are also essential, if he's
not a GIOQ type.
o The cheeks of the butt, on both men and women, actually have some
automatic sexual response linked to them, especially from repeated
pressure. This is because our distant ancestors often had sex
"doggy style", and so a patting sensation on the butt was a good
standard signal for hormones to start moving. Guys have it too,
for the same reason they have nipples. A good butt massage, or
perhaps gently rhythmic pressure, can really get some guys going.
o The anus should be carefully mentioned here. I say carefully
because, of course, a lot of guys feel uncomfortable with
attention to it. But it is an erotic zone, especially because it
includes the prostate gland. But more, again, in the advanced
section.
* Once he can't take it any more, or you can't, the question of spitting
versus swallowing comes up. Some people, in an attempt to not offend or
upset, claim that it's not really a big deal. But it is, overall. Of
course plenty of guys really don't care, or don't even like their lover
swallowing, while even more haven't had the chance to find out the
difference. But for most guys swallowing makes a (positive) difference.
This isn't just because it feels better, or more intimate. It's also,
perhaps even mainly, because spitting, or evading the ejaculation
altogether, brings on (even if they consciously know it's not the case)
a sense of rejection (conscious or subconscious). For a woman, imagine
a guy starting to go down on you and then making sputtering noises and
wiping your juices frantically from his tongue and lips. You might find
it a bit disappointing, if not just plain hurtful, wouldn't you. If
you're a guy reading this, then you don't need an example, you've
probably had it done to you. But most guys are used to lovers not
swallowing, so I only bring this up so we've made clear which way's
more likely to work "best".
* Don't forget that, though guys have a different kind of insecurity than
women, they do have frail egos...they just hide it more. So excited
smiles/faces and noises can, with some guys, make a big difference in
how much they enjoy it.
* Condoms This is your call. The odds of the blow-ee catching HIV/AIDS
from the blow-er are probably about the same as if you were shaking
hands. The odds of the person sucking/swallowing catching it are way
less than the odds of transmitting HIV/AIDS by coitus, and
astronimically less than catching it from anal sex, which makes up
probably more instances of transmission than all other forms of
transmission combined. In fact, there is little evidence at all of
HIV/AIDS being transmitted to someone who was performing fellatio,
aside from a few people who had a form of gum disease that resulted in
a lot of open cuts in their mouth. Oh, it's worth note that you get
tiny cuts in your mouth when you brush your teeth, though they heal in
minutes, so you might want to avoid brushing right before fellatio. Try
chewing gum instead, I guess. Heh.
Advanced Techniques
Swallowing (without it tasting really bad)
This is possible. In fact, only a mental barrier stands between those who
"can't" and those who can. But you have to know the technique. Oh, I should
point out that a large minority of people enjoy the taste, either for the
flavor or because bringing that kind of pleasure to their lover is so
wonderful.
But a larger number think it can taste pretty bad. This depends a lot on the
guy himself (each guy tastes different, some very much so), and also on what
they eat (rumor has it that fruit makes it taste better, and fatty foods
make it taste worse, as do some spices).
The trick is to not taste it at all. This sounds too simple to be true, but:
When a guy starts to cum, the typical response is to try to pace it a bit...
to hold it in one's mouth for a moment before swallowing. This is the only
reason one tastes it.
Instead, just start swallowing, immediately and hard. If you can get te tip
into the back of your mouth without having a gag reflect problem (more on
that later), the ejaculation will go completely down your throat without you
tasting it at all. All that's left is a vague aftertaste, and even that is
much weaker than if you had allowed it to stay in your mouth. This technique
fast-swallowing actually feels better, to a lot of guys, than if you had
paced it normally.
Deep Throating (overcoming the gag reflex)
A penis in the back of one's mouth sometimes makes them "gag". So does a
finger, or a banana, actually.
I put quotes around "gag" because it's sorta an illusion. The "trick" to not
"gagging" is to not interrupt the reflex. What, technically, is happening is
that your body is trying to swallow, and a finger, penis, or banana doesn't
cooperate. Some people can learn to just resist/ignore the reflex, but even
better is to turn it into a real swallow. I believe (don't try it at home)
that's how sword swallowers do it. Certainly it's how "deep throat"
technique people do it. It's really just that simple. When you would have
felt like gagging, you swallow. I, personally, have confirmed this with a
banana, and a finger.
This isn't just for swallowing (which it helps). It can feel very, very good
for fellatio overall.
Texture (don't just keep repeating a single motion)
But don't forget texture. OK, the largest minority of guys doesn't care at
all about variety (in a single session), he just wants rhythmic pumping. But
in that case most of these techniques are wasted on him, anyway. But the
rest of guys, a majority, are in various categories of liking at least some
change at some point during a specific fellatio session. I should bring up
the texture thing at the end of every section, but to save time and space
I'll just hope you remember this paragraph. Switch from one technique to
another every so often during a session, if he seems to respond well to
that. Try to make the change smooth and natural, don't just stop one thing
and start another. And we're not talking about switching every few
seconds...more like every few minutes, maybe even longer.
Various Other Oral Techniques
* Sucking really hard
Some guys hate this, but some are amazed at how good it feels. This is
especially good as a "texture" (variety) change during a blowjob. This
doesn't just mean sucking at one constant pressure...to really amaze
him, try sucking hard just on the out-stroke, or just on the in-stroke
(a more subtle effect), or actually pausing any motion while doing it.
* Licking
You may think this is obvious, but it's not, really. Especially since
many guys seem to just expect a rhythmic head-bobbing sorta suck-fest.
But licking is another technique that can be surprisingly effective.
Especially at two points - Early on, before you've actually touched his
penis and are (in theory) exciting him by working up to it. Licking is
a great way to make first contact. The other time is when you've
prolonged things until he's so hard and excited that breathing on him
seems to get him close. Trace the lines and textures of his head
(glans), down the ridge of his shaft (the side away from his
belly/abdomen, more on that later), his balls (more on that later), and
even the exact point where the inside of his thigh meets the skin of
his scrotum, on each side. That last spot almost deserves its own
section, because it can be very effective. Especially, again, early on
before you've focused on his penis, or after he's really, really close.
That area can also be sucked on, at other times...in some men this is
very stimulating.
* Giving him the shaft
The line down the shaft of his penis, on the side opposite where his
penis would touch his abdomen if pressed against it, is one of the
best-kept secrets. This is because its effect isn't obvious at first.
But firm, rhythmic stimulation at some point along the line down his
penis on that side (where exactly it is depends on the person) can have
a startling, strong effect. Depending on the situation, this can be
done with fingers, the tongue, or firm sucking (just on that area).
* Having a ball
This varies so much from guy to guy that it's kinda hard to nail down.
Some guys are almost indifferent to their balls/scrotum being given
attention, or are even uncomfortable with it...but more find it at
least a nice change, some find it fantastic. Various techniques include
sucking a whole "ball" into one's mouth, and gently fondling it with
the tongue, while it's there. This can't be done for very long without
becoming uncomfortable, though. Or licking about firmly at them when
not in the mouth, or to suck at the skin itself.
* I don't think I'll go much into analingus/anal sex. That would probably
require a whole separate article. (OK, I got enough questions about it
that I decided to write an article on it: Advanced Anal Sex Techniques)
Suffice it to say that a minority of people find this very stimulating,
and technically it should be, considering the proximity to vaginal
sexual nerves (women) and the prostate(men)...but most people are
little (or more) uncomfortable with it, performing or receiving.
* But, nearby, one has the base of the scrotum, going in a line toward
the anus. There is a spot along there which can be licked, or better
yet gently pushed with a finger in a rhythmic fashion, that stimulates
the prostate. This allows one to avoid the whole butt thing, if they're
uncomfortable with it, and still get a little of the almost magical
effect that stimulating the prostate can have. This may need to be
something done rhythmically for more than a little while, with the
penis being stimulated at the same time, to really work well. Gentle,
but firm.
Hands
A lot of the best techniques involve hands. If you or he insists on sticking
to purely oral, then a lot of amazing stuff is missed.
First, there's obviously caressing. This can be done all over the body, and
not just during the initial build-up phase. This is also a great thing to do
during pauses, when prolonging things when he's too close to orgasm too
soon.
* The Cock Pull
One really effective trick for direct attention to the penis is to use
both hands, but only in one direction. Saliva may be enough for this,
depending on the situation...but some additional lubricant, preferably
oil-based, may be necessary. Starting at the base, slide a hand up
toward the tip, placing the other hand by the base. Just before it
comes off of the tip, start the other hand moving up from the base
toward the tip. While doing that, put the other hand down on the base.
Keep this up, slowly getting faster. This works great with a really
hard penis (and it's so different/stimulating that he'll probably have
to look (or ask, if it's dark) to see what's going on)...but it's also
a great trick for someone who's not erect yet (or even having trouble
with it). This, obviously, is the one sure way to have a pumping-type
stimulation whether hard or not. It's my understanding that this works
miracles on some people who, say, are using blood pressure medication
or have some other erectile problem. The opposite works, too, though
only with an erect penis. I mean starting on the top and sliding down
to the base, starting the other hand on the tip before the first
finishes, et cetera, back and forth.
* The Drum
If you want to really amaze him, and have him trying to find out what
you're doing, try this - gently wrap a thumb and index finger around
his nuts, to pull them (again, gently) away from his body slightly,
until you have a slight sort of surface tension on the "end" (spot
farthest from his body), a bit like a bulging drum. Then gently (OK,
with a very few people it can be more forceful, but work your way up to
it) run your tongue in a circle around that "end" area. If one right
(and it's hard to get just right), it creates a really amazing
sensation. This won't get most people to orgasm, but it does feel
really good. With a few people you can even use your fingertip. Or
fingernail, though to me that feels a bit too much like a knife.
Hands are also a good backup plan for when your mouth tires. The best tactic
is make switching back and forth a normal part of your technique, so it's
not obvious if/when you do need to take a rest break for your mouth.
OK, there's a ton more I could write...but hey, there's also a lot I didn't
include in Advanced Cunnilingus Techniques. I'll probably get back and
spruce both of them up, eventually.
by KAZ
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