gayfriendly

'GAY FRIENDLY' OR GAY EXPLOITATION?

There is a marked number of advertisements these days appearing in the gay press from straight advertisers claiming to be 'gay friendly'. What does this mean? Do you think that the advertiser is courting you as a gay consumer because you are gay, or because he is aware of the power of the pink rand? Surely by stating that they are 'gay friendly', the advertiser is in fact saying that we will be tolerated in his establishment, and by tolerating us, the subtext is that there is something distasteful or undesirable about us in the first place? After all, do you see businesses which advertise that they are black-friendly, Muslim-friendly or Xhosa-friendly? Of course not. Yet these ‘gay-friendly’ types see fit to advertise that we are a separate class of individuals who are welcome in their shops. Perhaps it is a clever marketing ploy which appeals to gay insecurity. Here at last is someone who says that they appreciate our custom. Someone who makes us feel welcome. Someone who is giving us permission to spend our hard earned rands in their business. Someone who has no compunction about trading on our emotional insecurities!

Perhaps the acid test for these businesses is, besides taking from the gay community, what do they give back to the gay community, in terms of community projects or gay charities? An example. If a hypothetical leading bookstore in South Africa advertises that it is gay friendly, and carries a fairly wide selection of gay-related books, do they donate unsold books to the Gay & Lesbian Library when their shelf life is up? If an estate agency claims to be gay friendly, do they make an effort to help struggling gay service organisations find cheap or free accommodation from which to offer their community services? In other words, is being gay friendly only about getting gay money into your business, or does this friendliness extend to assisting the gay community in any way? Businesses are quick to climb on the bandwagon of high profile politically correct causes. But what about supporting the community which supports you, when it is an invisible cause?

Excuse my scepticism of the plethora of 'gay friendly' businesses out there. Maybe I am a cynic, but I find it very difficult to accept that Mr Straight South African, running his small business in Edenvale really has any interest in my gayness or me as a gay person other than what I can contribute to his bank balance. Wake up, girlfriends! Next time you encounter a 'gay friendly' business, ask them what they do to support the gay community. Put them on the spot to prove just how 'gay-friendly' they really are. Maybe when they have proved their bona fides, they will become 'gay-friendly' in terms of gay people regarding them as friendly and worthy of their support. After all, should it not be us determining which businesses are indeed ‘gay-friendly’, and not self-styled businesses who only have a pecuniary interest in homosexuality?