Memorable Not So PG lines from the Star Wars Trilogy

Photo of the Earth from Space

Introduction

Ever since 1977, when I first saw Star Wars, I have wanted to find someting that could truly do, such wonderful campy works of Sci-Fi, justice. I got lucky!! A co-worker of mine sent me this gem, to share with you.

I offer these gems to you in the order and sections, they were sent to me.

Top Ten Sexually Slanted Lines

  1. "Get in there you big furry oaf, I don't care what you smell!"
  2. "Luke, at that speed do you think you'll be able to pull out in time?"
  3. "Put that thing away before you get us all killed."
  4. "You've got something jammed in here real good."
  5. "Aren't you a little short for a stormtrooper?"
  6. "You came in that thing? You're braver than I thought."
  7. "Sorry about the mess..."
  8. "Look at the size of that thing!"
  9. "Curse my metal body, I wasn't fast enough!"
  10. "She may not look like much, but she's got it where it counts, kid."

From The Empire Strikes Back

  1. "I thought that hairy beast would be the end of me."
  2. "Size matters not. Judge me by my size, do you?"
  3. "There's an awful lot of moisture in here."
  4. "But now we must eat. Cum, good food, cumm..."
  5. "That's okay, I'd like to keep it on manual control for a while."
  6. "Hurry up, golden-rod..."<
  7. "I must've hit it pretty close to the mark to get her all riled up like that, huh kid?"
  8. "Possible he came in through the south entrance."
  9. "And I thought they smelled bad on the outside!"
  10. "Control, control! You must learn control!"

And now, our new list of sexually slanted lines from Return of the Jedi

  1. "What could possibly have come over Master Luke? Is it something I did? He never expressed any unhappiness with my work." (C3PO)
  2. "Hey, point that thing someplace else." (Han)
  3. "I look forward to completing your training. In time you will call me master." (Emperor)
  4. "You're a jittery little thing, aren't you?" (Leia)
  5. "I never knew I had it in me." (C3PO)
  6. "Someone must've told them about my little maneuver at the battle of Taanab." (Lando)
  7. "There is good in him, I've felt it." (Luke)
  8. "If I told you half the things I've heard about this Jabba the Hutt, you'd probably short circuit." (C3PO)
  9. "I assure you, Lord Vader, my men are working as fast as they can." (Jerjerrod) with reply "Perhaps I can find new ways to motivate them." (Darth)
  10. "Grab me, Chewie. I'm slipping -- hold on. Grab it, almost...you almost got it. Gently now, all right, easy, easy, hold me, Chewie. Chewie!"
  11. (Han) with "A little higher, just a little higher." (Lando)
  12. "Short help's better than no help at all." (Han)
  13. "Hey, Luke, thanks for coming after me -- now I owe you one." (Han)
  14. "Back door, huh? Good idea!" (Han)

Copyright © 1997. Megahn Yamanshini & David Martin All rights reserved.
Edited by: Meghan Yamanishi & David Martin

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