Attitude
That old cliche, "You've come a long way baby," seems to be ringing home for a lot girls and myself. Do you all remember back to when you first started on your path? If you are like me, fear played a big factor. The fear of discovery and of being read was so prevalent in my life that it dictated when and how I dressed and where I went. The key early on is to disappear and to blend into the wood work (blouses made of knotty pine with walnut stain). But as we get experience and confidence we begin to develop our own personalities and looks. We begin to come alive and to develop into real live breathing human begins. Then one day something happens - we get an attitude. I am not saying that it is bad because it just part of our evolution into three-dimensional women. As we develop an outward style we also evolve an inner person or maybe it is just that we are letting that repressed individual out finally. And as we let more and more of our true selves out, we see that we are also developing a personality and somewhere and somehow we get an attitude. And not just any attitude; it is one of defiance and pride. The fear has been replaced. No longer are we scared to be read and satisfied to blend in. Now we are proud of whom we are and we do not care what the world thinks. This is my life; I have come to terms with my issues, and you just better get used to it. If you have a problem with who I am then it is just that; it is "your" problem.So is this good? Well that is debatable because like so many things, too much of a good thing can be bad. I have seen some girls who were very "in your face" about whom they were, to the point that it got them fired and they lost friends who would have otherwise been supportive. But I do think that it is good because it shows a healthy self acceptance of who we are. It is just one of many steps that we have to take and one that shows that we are individuals. Remember the rebellion that teenagers go through? It is the same for us in a way. Just as teenagers try to find themselves in society we too are doing it the same thing except in a more focused manner.
But there is hope for us. Teenagers mature into "normal" adults with a self-image of who they are and we too seem to mellow out. Do we lose our fighting spirit? No. Somewhere along the way we just get to a point of self-acceptance and we realize that we do not have anything to prove. It is time to just live life and be happy. Those around us all know. Those with problems have left and those accepting are still here. We are happy but do not rub us the wrong way because we can still be a bitch if we want.
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