You Got To Have Balls To Do This
I was speaking to a friend the other day, and she was agonizing over having to tell her father that she was TS. Up until now her father did not have to know and there was no benefit in telling him; but now for her own well being she had decided to tell him. As you all know, telling a spouse or a loved one that you are a transsexual is probably the most difficult task that any of us well ever have to face. So I was empathizing with her when she made this profound statement (well to me it was profound). She said, "A few years ago I would have just walked up to him and told him but I am so wishy washy these days from the hormones that I can't make even a simply decision."Hormones linked to decision making? Now that was a connection I had never thought of before and that got me thinking which is very dangerous and I have been told to leave that to the experts who know what’s best for me. If my friend is right and logic would tend to support her, then the hormones do effect ones ability to make decisions. We know that testosterone affects the libido and an individuals drive and competitiveness and aggressiveness, so why not affect one's need or drive to make decisions. If you go from an aggressive personality to a passive one, would it not be logical for you not to want to make decisions as critical as telling someone that you are transgendered?
If this is true, then maybe we need to rethink how we transition and the order in which we do things. It would make sense now to do the hard decision task first when we still have the testosterone and drive to do them before we start HRT. I know that this is not a popular prospective but think about. You need the drive and aggression and the assertiveness that the testosterone provides to out yourself to family, to friends and to co-workers. So would it not be logical to do that early in our transition before HRT which will weaken that drive in us?
To put it bluntly, you need balls to transition. I know a post op girl that uses testosterone patches to help increase her libido which is totally gone since surgery. Hmmmm, maybe we can get the same benefit in decision making. We can slap on a patch a day or so before we have to make a hard decision and when the time comes, we have just the boost we need to make it happen. Then we rip it off (ouch) and we return to our meek and passive selves. I wonder what the HBSOC committee would think of this recommendation? Well until then I will have to decide if I will tell them or not and I am not sure I should. Anyone got a patch?
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