CLOSETED SOUL
This closet of mine, so dry, so cold,
Such a very lonely place to stay,
A trap to keep me locked to myself
With a key that seems to be hidden away.
My family, my buddies, my friends,
All which to my heart I hold dear,
No nothing about what is real within me,
Just lies and misconceptions they hear.
Closing my heart to all who know me,
All my true feelings I deny,
Struggling to make sense of it all
So frustrated and hurt I just cry.
Am I wrong to feel this way
To want the touch of another man,
To feel the heart and soul of someone
The way I know that no woman can?
Sometimes I wonder if it would be easier
Just to give this whole thing up,
To try to live the straight way of life
And maybe these feelings would just stop.
But would it be a shame to deny myself
Of what I know is so true,
To have my heart left unfulfilled
And love a man like I was meant to?
I know the path I am taking is not a straight one
But rather a winding, unknown road,
I must have to will to withstand the pressure
Or my heart will for sure explode.
How long can I keep up this masquerade
Of being as straight as an arrow,
And when will it all stop hurting
And be free to admit it to any fellow.
Hopefully someday the world will realize that
The truth about me and my feelings
Should not change the way they feel or act
Or treat me and in all of my dealings.
All this is not a choice for me
But how can they understand,
And rather believe that I cannot change
The way I feel about being with a man?
Someday the world will take me for who I am
And know that I am not wrong, but right,
To have the love of another man,
For this I am ready to fight.
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