Adoption Triangle

Part I

Who is involved:

Birthparents

These are the biological parents. I've seen the term birthparent in a few books on adoption. I prefer this term taher than "real" parents because that seems to imply that adoptive parents are not parents, but instead simply baby-sitters.

A parent is someone who nurtures and loves. Birthparents give life, give a beginning.

Adoptee

This is the one who is adopted, often referred to as the "child" even in adulthood.

Adoptive Parents

The parents who adopt, the ones who raise someone else's biological child as their own.

Of course, just as important are the siblings, grandparents, and other family members, whether they are related biologically or through adoption.

I was treated as part of my adoptive family, not like an outsider. I always knew I was adopted -- which I feel is very important to all involved -- but it was a part of me, not all of me. It wasn't until my dad remarried that I was treated like an outsider by his new wife.

I think that many people just assume that once an adoption is legally official that that is the end of it, nothing to discuss. The adopted child grows up, works, marries, etc. But that isn't the end, but actually the beginning. Being adopted is a life-long process. Each person's situation is different, yet we share many of the same feelings, similar experiences.

Searching -- Part II

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