People get hair in the strangest places;
between their eyes or all over their faces.
but wherever they get it, there's none to compare
with the strange, strange place i get my hair.

Well, there's them that's hairy and them that's not;
and them that shave it wherever it's got;
and there's them that's beardly and baldly and such;
some with scalp hair who can't beardly much.

There's others with bellies so fuzzy you'd scream.
they got cute belly-buttons, cain't ever be seen.
and there's somes with bums that look just like their head
and probably wish hair were elsewhere instead.

There's them with follicles all over their chest,
on their arms, their legs, their necks and the rest;
and there's hair on their knuckles, in ears and the nose,
and anywhere else such proturberances grows.

Well, i've got hair on my head and over each eye;
and no hair on my chin, though i can't tell you why.
and there's a little bit here, and a little bit there,
and all sorts of places -- that's where i got hair.

But the weirdest hairs i ever have grown
are in the strangest place that i've ever known,
'cause i'm not extra-hirsute with carpets of hair
and if anyone saw them, i know they would stare.

They're almost as gross as the hairs on my nose
(the next worst of all places for my hairs to grows).
but where i got these ones, well, god only knows,
'cause i got hobbit-like hairs on the tips of my toes.

© Chris Frazer, 1979

This page was last on August 25, 1998

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