Nothing defines, or divides gay Americans more than the Ages of 18 and 21.
With England about to lower its gay age of consent to 16, the USA is beginning to
look a little stupid. We are soon to be the only western democracy with both an 18 age
of consent (in most places) and a 21 drinking age.
I cannot see what good the age of consent is accomplishing. The average age
that American boys first have sex, according to federal statistics, is 16. That means half
of the country should be in jail. Clearly half of the country is not in jail. So why do I
think it’s such an important gay issue?
The trouble is American age of consent laws are mainly used as a way to
discriminate against gay people (and black people). See, when you have a law that
makes half the country into sex criminals and is therefore unenforceable, you give
every local police force the power to decide who “gets away with it.” Basically they
can bust anyone they want, and they are much more likely to bust a 20yo queer with a
17yo boyfriend, than to bust a 20yo straight boy. In a 1996 study the American Bar
Association agreed that consent laws are “applied unevenly... against men from social
groups we do not like. Unable to prosecute the whole country, law enforcement
officials apply the law against unpopular groups” like gay people.
The 21 drinking age is more complex. Clearly it does more bad than good, and
is particularly damaging to gay people. Actually the fact is that nearly all gay social life
in the United States take place in clubs and bars, and that since drinking ages were
raised from 18 to 21 in the 1980’s, gay youth have been utterly excluded from
American public social life.
Its time to stop being close minded about the drinking age, and consider
whether it really has its intended effect. People say DUI highway road death are down
since the 1980’s, which is true, however there are much stronger penalties now,
including license revocation for drinking and driving; billions have been spend on
public education. This is much more important in traffic fatality reduction than the
drinking age has ever been. I know that teenage drinking actually rising despite the age
limit; clearly a 21 drinking age is nearly as unenforceable as an 18 age of consent. I
believe that just as they will have sex, teenagers will drink regardless of whether it’s
legal. They will simply drink and have sex, maybe insanely, somewhere away from gay
social life. In many towns it will actually be in a remotely parked car.
Younger people excluded as they are, from the gay scene and made criminals
by their existence, are much more likely than our European counterparts to developed
resentment or even consider suicide. Same thing with the HIV infection rate for
American gay teenagers is rising (it is lowering for every other group). One possible
cause: especially in small towns, kids are excluded from gay social life, which may be
their only point of contact with anyone who could give then AIDS information. In
many towns an 18yo’s only gay option may be a sex club.
The fundamental question, of course is not about alcohol, but about access for
teenagers to public meeting places. And in this respect our own community bears part
of the blame. It is shameful how few gay clubs allow people under-21. Clubs don’t
have to deny access, they can simply require ID at the bar and/or give under-21s and
over-21s different hand stamps, or wristbands. The fact that so few clubs allow
under-21s is testimony to the greed and thoughtlessness of the gay business
community.
The 21 limit for clubs and the 18 limit for sex have over the past 15 years
combined to make gay life in the USA neurotic. When my friends from UK came to
Miami to visit me, they got shock at how much bad attitude and distrust there is
between younger and older American gay people. But is it any wonder, when the two
groups are separated at every turn? How can you understand people you never see?
This divide in the gay community hurts everyone, both young and old. And it is
in this way that the consent and drinking ages have combined not just to limit gay
teenagers, but also to wreck the flavor and fabric of gay life in the USA.
I wonder why these issues are not on our national agenda. Most people say
there is no point even discussing them, that we will never win them. I disagree. 10
years ago in England the age of consent was 21, I never imagined it would be 16. Still
people marched and scaled the Houses of Parliament in a riot. I’m not calling on you
to do this necessarily, but just remember: times change and countries evolve. But first
we need to admit there’s a problem. If you are an average college gay student, you are
23yo. Therefore you probably know the bad effects of both these laws firsthand. All I
am saying is, when you get a little older, make sure to use your resources to fix them.
Just don’t forget what it was like.