1. You've seen "Crying Game" four times.

2. When you meet someone named John, you assume he spells his name "Jon."

3. You're even more sick of "Karma Chameleon" than everyone else.

4. When you put in the Storytellers CD, instead of the announcer saying, "For the first time since 1985," he says, "You again??"

5. You find yourself using words like "have a shag", "a ladder in her tights", "mum", "we had a row", and "snogging"....and you're NOT British!

6. Your friends express a desire to hear less about what George is up to, and more about what you're up to.

7. Alternately, you HAVE no friends who aren't as obsessed as you are.

8. You've made suggestions to the "Things to do When Bored" list.

9. Not only have you made suggestions to it, but you've DONE things on that list.

10. You think "Waking Up with the House on Fire" is a great album.

11. When you speculate on what you'd name your kids if you had any, the names you come up with are George, Roy, Mikey and Jon for a boy, and Georgia, Helen, Alison, and Zee for a girl.

12. You know the astrological sign of each member of Culture Club.

13. You know the eye color and height of each member of Culture Club.

14. You can name the spouses, kids, and ex lovers of every member of Culture Club.

15. Your fondest memory in life is seeing Culture Club in concert.

16. You bought the September 1, 1998 issue of “The Advocate.” Your main reason for making this purchase? The full page add for the Storytellers CD.

17. Your goal in life has nothing to do with love or with career plans---it’s to meet George and the rest of the band.

18. You find that you can’t afford bus fare because you've spent all your money on CC stuff.

19. You find yourself fantasizing about CC so much you don't know if it really happened or not.

20. Alternately, you have dreams about CC so often you're not sure if they really happened or not.

21. Alternately, you have dreams and fantasies so often that you feel if you saw George and CC on the street they would know you.

22. You’re not gay, but you really wish you were----just to empathize with George.

23. You can name all the O'Dowd children from oldest to youngest.

24. You have devoted some time to serious speculation over whatever happened to "Suede." In fact, if you even KNOW who Suede is, then you qualify!

If 5 or more of these apply to you, GET HELP! (or have fun with it, being a fan of a great rock group is a neat thing)

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Got more suggestions (from personal experience)? Send them to Stormkeeper. Thanks to Heather for some of these ideas.

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