One evening last winter as I was coming home from baby sitting I knew that there would be guests in my house. I knew that there would be about five couples. I knew that the males in these pairs were cross dressers. I did not know, however, or rather didn't realize, that they were all normal people (I still have my doubts about some just kidding!!!)

I was worried about what I would see when I walked in the front door. I remember taking the long way to the living room, biding my time as I walked through the computer room and the kitchen then finally to the room where the meeting was. The first thing I remember seeing as I entered the room was a man with white hair who towered above the rest of the people in the room. After that, I was just gazing blankly at everyone, not feeling quite comfortable, and just trying to fit in.

Eventually I loosened up. I was cracking jokes, making people laugh (hopefully not hurting anyone’s feelings). I really didn’t know what to say, but I wanted everyone to like me.

After that evening I decided that I enjoyed spending time with these people. Every time I hear that there is a family event I make sure I am the first one ready to go. Of course I’ve only been to the banquet and the camping trip, but I had a good time and I plan on going to some other events as well.

The banquet was kinda strange for me at first because I wasn’t really sure what it would be like. Yes, I had seen my father ‘en femme’ a dozen times before, but not with anyone else.

It was an experience.

I sat at the dinner table and found someone just about my age to talk with. We commented on people’s dresses, shoes, and hair -- it was interesting.

The next family event that I went to was the en homme camping trip. It was a lot more fun than the banquet. I knew that there were no boundaries to what I could and couldn’t do. I had a lot of fun and learned quite a lot.

For instance, a very wise man (ahem... sarcasm anyone?) taught me how to swim through a wall of mud. It was rather disgusting, but educational nonetheless.

After everything I had done with these people I had felt like I truly fit in, or, fit in as best I could.

So, I wanted to attend a board meeting. Even though I got to see everyone, I don’t think I’ll be going to go to another one. Board meetings are one of those things that aren’t for the whole family. For me, the board meeting turned very quickly into a BORED meeting. But I guess business matters just don’t interest me like that.

This is a very interesting group and I feel privileged to be a part of the family. I’m starting to appreciate people for their originality, and it’s nice to know that I’m not the only one out there who has a family member who is “gender gifted” or one of those terms.

I’m always glad to join in activities with the wonderful friends of Tau Gamma and I’m looking forward to the Mad Hatter’s ball in October.

[ed. note: Amanda is 14 yrs old and the daughter of our Facilitator, Heidi]

Gender Blender Jun/Aug 98