WHERE' S THE MAGIC?

by Sherri Lynn Carmichael

The other day I was speaking with a fellow sister when this sister told me that Kappa Beta meetings no longer held the magic they once had. This sister has been attending Kappa Beta meetings as long as I have. Two years ago this August, we both visited Kappa Beta for the first time.

I understand what she means about the magic. It is that feeling of wonder and joy of finding people that are like yourself. Getting to meet people that don't think you are weird or crazy. Finding real friends that you can talk to for the first time in you life. I understand this because I have felt the magic.

I also understand when she said the magic was gone. After almost two years, I must say I don't enjoy the meetings like I once did. I find that to experience the magic I must see it through the eyes of a new sister. Watching a new sister visit Kappa Beta brings back all the old feelings I have forgotten.

After several years of attending meetings, many sisters stop attending. Perhaps they have grown to the point that they no longer need to travel to Charlotte to dress. Maybe they find they can no longer dress due to their life's situation. Or, could it be they just lost the magic?

Have you ever thought about why you belong to Kappa Beta? Speaking for myself, I first joined to find sisters I could talk to. It was a safe place to dress and I did not have to worry about anyone finding out about my secret. All this has changed for me now.

I find myself working to make Kappa Beta what it was when I first attended. Helping new sisters find us and, in the process, themselves. Watching them come out of those closets they have been hiding in for so many years.

We as a group must set up priorities to insure that new sisters feel the magic that we once felt. Reaching out to new sisters must be our first concern. Getting a new sister to her first meeting is the most important thing we can do.

If that new sister is married or has a special woman in her life, it is just as important that her needs and concerns are met, too. We should help these sisters with families all we can, to make things go smoothly for them. That's called support.

Finally, we must provide a safe place to meet and restaurants to dine in, while protecting our new sisters from the public and introducing them to the gender community. Setting a high standard of conduct during our meetings should also be maintained to insure that no visitors are offended.

The magic is still at our meetings. You are just not looking hard enough for it. Focus on helping our new sisters. Put someone ahead of yourself and try to make their dream come true. Do these things and I think you will feel the magic again.