JULIE-CAT'S TV INTERVIEW




Q: Let's define our terms. What's the difference between a CD and a TV?

A: $100 and a cosmetics catalog.

Q: In other words, CD's wear lingerie, but TV's add make-up and perhaps a wig?

A: TV's go all the way. It DOES look better in the mirror. You've heard the expression, "Must See T.V.?"

Q: What's a "Drag Queen."

A: Elizabeth. If she wasn't so plain and boring her subjects might call her a "Fun Queen."

Q: Now, CD's are straight, they say 80% of TV's are straight, and that Drag Queens are gay...

A: Listen, as they say over at Dress Barn, "let's forget about fancy labels, ok?"

Q: What would you prefer?

A: Let's use TG "trans-gendered," anyone who, in fantasy or reality, for an intense ten minutes a week or every darn day, thinks like, wears clothes like, or imagines being the opposite sex.

Q: That's a broad definition.

A: Well, sometimes I imagine I'm a broad. What did you expect?

Q: Why do you like to wear women's underwear instead of men's?

A: Why do you choose pancakes over waffles?

Q: I don't get the connection. What do panties and pancakes have in common?

A: Both can be pretty hot and full of syrup!

Q: This is a serious question for a lot of people.

A: We don't know WHY we have a preference for most ANYTHING. Why do you like pancakes over waffles? You feel like it. The next day, you might change your mind.

Q: And you?

A: I change my panties! Do you think I'm a dirty girl??

Q: Aren't you?

A: Well...sometimes. May I quote William Burroughs? "Everything's permitted." Why not have a rich fantasy life?

Q: Some men wear panties under their business clothes. Isn't that ridiculous? Nobody can see it.

A: Women wear sexy lingerie under their clothes, too, and nobody sees it. It's all about feeling good about yourself. Or just feeling yourself in something good!

Q: Most TG's experiment very early, and put on their mother's or sister's clothing. You too?

A: Yes, doctor.

Q: Why is that?

A: Because I didn't live with any sexier women! I would've preferred Linda Ronstadt's panties, or Stevie Nicks' slip, or Farrah Fawcett's bra! But they didn't live with me!

Q: I'm trying to ask serious questions about transvestism!

A: Not here! Enough with the guilt and the nonsense! It feels good to wear frills sometimes. Good can't be too bad!

Q: But "dressing up" is unconventional-

A: What about the grown man who dresses up like his favorite sports star! Not content to fantasize, he gets a jersey with JORDAN on the back! Or a baseball hat with the home team on it! And he walks around in this stuff. Do we think he's weird? No.

Q: How can you possibly equate cross-dressing with professional sports??

A: Two words: Dennis Rodman!

Q: Why is it you're always coming up with these zinger answers?

A: Because this is my website and I can even go back and change the transcript! I assume you're now discouraged enough to end the interview?

Q: Yes. One last question. Where did the word "transvestite" come from?

A: "Trans-vest." We want to take off our vests. We prefer bras and a nice blouse!

Q: Thanks, Julie. You seem like a very well-adjusted TG.

A: I hope I didn't give that impression. It's not true. I'm not well-adjusted at all. My bra strap keeps rolling down and these panties are riding up on me!

Q: You're really wearing a bra?

A: And panties! See?

Q: Oh, nice! Let me get a camera...Don't cover up your cute body!

A: No, just my cute face! You have no respect for a girl's modesty! Hmmm...and neither do I! Interview's over!