the answer is, yes, i am submissive, but within reason, if daddybear [or anyone else, for that matter] chooses to step too far beyond the set limits i'll let him know about it, if he continues to step beyond those limits, i'll tell him about that too, then i'll get up and i'll leave him. i don't have time to be beaten up by someone who doesn't care about me, that's happened enough already.

- who you are

	name:  julian comley/nicodemus caine

	usually called:  cub, the cub, the.little.wolfe, greywolfe,
			 nicodemus, nico, mr.caine [on *rare* occasions]
			 the.little.lord.of.smiles, son, boy, squirrel,
			 the rat, water lilly um...
			 there are a host of names for me, just pick
			 the one you like the most.
	sign:  20 august 1975 -> leo (though a very untypical one)

	education>latively little here, i do listen to classical music, which my
sister seems to propogate, i don't have a problem with it, i just don't
know what's going on inside of it :) and, oh my god, the canto gregoriano,

[but i'll go into why i don't listen to that much anymore in a moment or
three :)]
otherwise, i like everything, i've even sat through jazz, some soul and
funk and yes...well... :)
i'm not classically versed at all, i just like the music, which is probably
incredibly naive, but it's the way i go about it :)

- reading interests:
science fiction/fantasy/horror/basically anything and everything, except
for historical novels and textboosks and travelogues :) i do occasionally
read love stories, but more often than not, i don't.  my favourite book,
to date, was clive barker's imajica, shortly followed by david morrell's
the fraternity of the stone.

- writing:
for more information visit the
booklist

most of my writing tends to be of a creative bent, but i do occasionally have
to write reports for my course, not that i really enjoy that sort of thing.




to date i've written the following:


- books/short stories:
the.little.book.of.poetry - 1993
the twelve crystal balls - novella - 1989
the animals - novella - 1990
darkness - book of short stories - 1990/1991
the wolves i - novel - 1991
the wolves ii - novel - 1991/1992
the god machine - novella - 1992
shades of darkness - book of short stories - 1992
messages - autobiography - 1993
religion journal - 1994
religion journal - 1995
behind a locked door/in thee we place our trust - novel - 1995
religion journal - 1996
animals and other interesting creatures - short stories - 1996/1997
trapped - novel [in progress] 1997
beyond the veil - novel [in progress]

short stories not in books:
the mattheo waterford stories - 1995/1996
bitter hands and it's commentry - 1995
the illigitimate tales - 1995
pray your gods - 1995
the tower - pornography - 1997
the stranger - 27 april 1997
someone to belong to - pornography - 19 may 1997
you have been loved - pornography - 3 july 1997
> a prayer to daddy - pornography - 11 july 1997



albums/songs:
album list:
-----------
monastery of souls						sin1
.been there before						sin2
simple truth						sin3
tales of a broken priest					sin4
for not knowing the right words					sin5
almost, always, never						sin6
window of faith						sin7
welcome to mercy street					sin8
god whispers - the songs of love					sin9
demonology:a sinners tale					sin10
epistle of pain:afternath of sin					sin11
julian comley:accoustic					sin12
a and b sides						sin13
tinderbox:flames:a sinners salvation				sin14
myself, angels, god, everything					sin15
the wonder of being lost...					sin16
sin sketches						sin17

single list:
------------
she makes me feel						sin2
make me happy						sin3
father, father						sin4
little girl kisses						sin4
the cross of love						sin6
forever forgotten						sin7
special doubt						sin7
little girl on a string						sin8
push							sin9
i think i've lost your love					sin10
thank-you							sin15
i've got time						sin16
wrong							sin16
i'm sorry							sin17
personal ep						unsinned

unreleased singles not on albums:
--------------------------------------
vows of secrecy(live)						sin1
crucify(live)						sin12
scapegoat(alternative)					sin16
glass fire
tears(different)
unholy
xtc drum machine
for these and all my sins




- roleplaying games:
i play two systems consistently, but am always willing to try 
something new, the two systems that i've been bought up on is advanced
dungeons and dragons [is what it says] and vampire:the masquerade [same
story here]

- card games:
- magic:the gathering
this is a ccg [collectible card game] the oversimplified objective of the
game is as follows:two wizards stand head-to-head and try to destroy each
other by casting creatrue/enchantment/artifact spells.  the first
*commecrially* successful card game of it's kind, arguably simple, but still
one of the best games around.

- vampire:the etnal struggle/jyhad
another ccg [collectible card game] based on the white wolf roleplaying
game, vampire:the masquerade, this was the immediate offspring from magic
and is in my opinion one of the most tactical games to have come out of
the whole ccg stable, it's also fun to play with zillions of other people
playing alongside you [though this could take forever :)]

- netrunner
this is something that i've just started to play, and as a direct result
of one of my friends going to the united states and bringing back a host
of netrunner cards, i quite like the game, but can't say too much about it,
as i haven't played it for nearly as long as i've been playing magic and
vampire, the objective here is to raid corporates of their data by hacking
into their computers and stealing what you can.  nice concept, nice game.

- computer games:
i'm one of those sad individuals who hates doom :) yuck computers were
not invented for unadulterated rubbish like this [double standard creeping
up now, but doom multiplayer is fun ;)]
i enjoy a decently scripted and thought-provoking adventure game, with a
possible simulation thrown in every now and again.
some of my favourite games:

loom - what a cool, quirky system :)
gabrial knight i and ii - brilliantly scripted.
the dig - nice story for this one :)
the kyrandia triology - the music got me going here :)
dune i - the music and visuals for this were stunning, it's bastard cousin
dune ii was silly in comparison.
sim city i - the original.
civilization i - the original.

my current favourite game at the moment seems to be magic:the gathering, the
microprose version :)

- computers:
err...well, i have no choice, really, it's my area of study :)



- sports: 
magic:the gathering, chess, nothing outdoorsy, really :)



- tv:
i watch as little as i can, and prefer to read instead, i will watch
movies, though, because they're one off experiences and you don't tend to
flit your life away waiting for the next instalment of soap opera on the
bridge [sigh]
i do occasionally watch little snatches of mainstream tv, in the sense
that i will, sometimes, watch something like home improvements, or the
fresh prince of bel air, or something of that nature, i like programs that
are over soon, but that provide some escapism in their content.

- radio shows:
i enjoy barney simon's late night alternative music on our national (!)
radio station, radio5, which is, with all due respect, the best radio
station we have in this country, since it plays new music and so on.
[they were the first to play the new u2 and now the new depeche mode/
marilyn manson/various others] favourite evenings are wednesdays, [the
alternative top 20] i tend to peruse the radio far more than i do tv.



- diversions:
once had a dog, the dog disappeared, his name, incidentally, was
chomps, as in the dog from the movie.  [if you don't know who chomps was,
let's just put it this way, he was a bionic dog.  ok, so i was eight or
something when i named him] :) [sigh]



- religion:
once upon a time i was catholic, i still consider myself to be such, but i
don't go to mass or adhere to any of the formal rituals.  i had a crisis of
faith when i turned 19 [i know it sounds trite to say, but there will be
an explanation in a moment]
i still believe in god and think of him as an external, as opposed to an
internal source, but right now i've no real desire to step into a catholic
church.



- colouring:

	skin - white
	head hair - brown
	beard hair - brown with snatches of red.
	body fur - dark brown, i have lots of it everywhere but my chest, belly and back.
	eyes - deep brown
	butt - hm?  tightish, i'll guess, i'm still little, incidentally my daddybear thinks
	my butt is gorgeous and has often left teeth marks on it [grynne :) but then,
	my daddybear is just wierd.  it's not my fault, really :) oh.  and he also thinks it's
	nice and hairy.
	[what gives you the impression that he's sitting next to me editing as we go
	along? ;)]
	circumsiced/uncircumcised - i'm kinda circumcised.

* i've been allowed to grow my beard again, which means i'll go for the

* sparsish look [yay! - julian the momon[tm] ;)] as for my hair, i like to try

* and get it as long as possible, but it's still taking a while to grow back

* from from the last shredding :p 

	hands - little, writers hands, very smooth.
	feet - 4 and a half.  i have tiny feet.
	err.  oh.  daddybear again.  he says that my one toe crosses over the other one ;)
	vocal range - not sure, in the morning my voice is deep and pleasant, but it rises
	steadily during the day until i sound more-or-less normal for my age.

	preference in men: 
	great, big daddybears :)
	on the surface, i like:
	greying hair/bearded critters, who are rather large, [ie, plump, fat, rotund, whatever
	you wish to call it] that are over forty who can be a touch domineering, but who are
	willing to negotiate.
	on the inside i like:
	a warm heart and ready smile, someone who just enjoys being close to his cub, someone
	who is willing to love and be loved for who and what he is, i like men who are honest,
	forthright and who can hold down a decent conversation, i respect moral integrity and
	social standards, basically, in a nut-shell i'd want to be around someone who harbours
	no prejudice and who is quiet and gentle.

	i seem to get along with most people i come into contact with, but am often afraid that
	i may estrange them because of the things i do or say [one such daddybear i met on irc
	spoke to me for two days before dismissing me as tiresome, because of the way i tend
	to use the keyboard on irc.]

	the intellectual/emotional question:
	i would hope that the person i bump into has a capacity for both, as i don't feel that
	one should dominate the other, but i do understand that there isn't always such in
	overlap in all people.  if i had to make a decision in a case like this i'd go for a
	slightly more emotional critter who could be gentle and kind.




- major relationships/lovers/husbands:
my first major relationship was with a roman catholic priest, [which is why
i no longer want to step into a church] he didn't necessarily have sex with
me, [though at times we came very close] but he did mess around with the
way i thought and i've been slowly getting over it ever since, it goes slowly
and some days the damage that has been healed comes undone.
i'm much better now at dealing with it than i was before, which has helped
a tremendous amount.
the second man i went out with was my sexual mentor, he taught me everything
i ever wanted to know about gay sex [and a few things i wasn't quite as keen
on learning too :)] he was a nice man, but he was trying to force my hand on
anal sex [ie he wanted to insert into me before i was ready] and i didn't
really want to be in a position where i'd do something that i'd maybe regret
later, so i talked it over with him and have spoken to him since, but the
intensity of that was broken off.
my current daddybear is the kind, gentle person i've been searching for, he's
just a good man who loves me unconditionally, which is the way i love him.
when i'm away from him i long to be back, and when i'm with him i could spend
eternity in his arms, or i could spend hours just kissing him.



- fetishes:
this is one i'm vaguely afraid of answering, because it sounds wierd :)
i'm turned on by round stomachs :) [grins stupidly] i know it sounds dumb
as fetishes go, but it's true :) honest :)
oh yes and then there's that bizarre suit fetish :)
i love men in business clothes, particularly bears :)

- turnoffs in men:
smoking, prejudice, there's actually surprisingly little that i can't stand
about men, i'm not fond of one-upmanship, or trying to gain the upper hand
and game-playing, if you're going to let me know something do it without
mincing your words, if possible :)

- mans body part i look at first:
this would be his face...shortly followed by his belly [that fetish, kicking
in ;) [sigh]] all the rest is pretty arbitary, i mean, if a man has a kind,
gentle, honest face, i'll probably wind up talking to him.



- sexplay:
i'm very much into being gentle and kind, so i enjoy hugging, kissing,
touching, feeling, stroking and holding men, i also enjoy just sometimes
lying with him and just being around him... :)

- top/bottom:
ok...at the moment i'm a top, i know this almost certainly and i'm happy
to do whatever is required, but i've begun to fantasize, slowly, about
what it'd be like at the bottom and now i'm not sure [ever met a really
confused top? well, i am he ;)] my current parentbear and i have been
exploring this in a sort of gentle way, with him only making overtures
when i'm absolutely positive that i want to do something, and it's slowly
becoming very interesting...if a little painful.

- favorite places to have sex:
hm.  i've not had too much experience here, so i don't really know...the
wierdest place i've ever had sex was a kitchen floor, but normally i just
opt for a bed of some sort :)

- favorite time:
anytime, really :)
there is no time like the present. :)
 


- food preference:
my favourite food is, by far and away, potatoes of any kind, but apart from
that i like meats [give me a vienna and i'm happy] i'm not too fussy when it
comes to food, so it's relatively easy to feed me, just avoid giving me
green things unless i've had a look at them first, otherwise you may find me
avoiding them.  i don't like offal or any of the stranger parts of dead
creatures.  my favourite desert?  hm.  hard to say, i like chocolates with a
minty flavour, so, at a guess, i'd say that my favourite desert would be
after eight dinner mints [expensive, yes, but worth it] and maybe even cote
d 'or chocolate [but a little of this is more than enough as it's incredibly
sweet]



- last movie i saw and liked:
probably the fifth element :)

- last video i saw and liked:
strangely, i took out the rats of nimh again and it was still as enchanting
as ever.



- the cdlist
cd's i own:

	soundgarden - down on the upside
	portisehead - dummy
	toad the wet sprockett - fear
	counting crows - august and everything after
	counting crows - recovering the satelites
	depeche mode - violator
	depeche mode - songs of faith and devotion
	depeche mode - ultra [bought 20 april 1997]
	benidictine monks - canto gregoriano
	enigma - mcmxc a.d.
	enigma - the cross of changes
	enigma - le roi est mort, vive le roi!
	crowded house - together alone
	phil collins - both sides
	george michael - older
	pet shop boys - very
	pet shop boys - alternative
	tori amos - under the pink
	tori amos - boys for pele
	r.e.m - automatic for the people
	everything but the girl - walking wounded
	live - secret samadhi
	radiohead - ok computer [20 august 1997]

	sabsolutely positive that i want to do something, and it's slowly
becoming very interesting...if a little painful.


- favorite places to have sex:
hm.  i've not had too much experience here, so i don't really know...the
wierdest place i've ever had sex was a kitchen floor, but normally i just
opt for a bed of some sort :)

- favorite time:
anytime, really :)
there is no time like the present. :)
 


- food preference:
my favourite food is, by far and away, potatoes of any kind, but apart from
that i like meats [give me a vienna and i'm happy] i'm not too fussy when it
comes to food, so it's relatively easy to feed me, just avoid giving me
green things unless i've had a look at them first, otherwise you may find me
avoiding them.  i don't like offal or any of the stranger parts of dead
creatures.  my favourite desert?  hm.  hard to say, i liC/p>



- outlook on life:
gentleness counts, if you can help someone in need, or if you can make friends
with those that surround you, you will be able to overcome a great many things,
because your friends will be more willing to be there for you, since you were
there for them.
to listen effectively is an art.
to love honestly is a gift.
to be yourself is peace.



- travels:
south west africa(1989).
am planning to come to the us in about two years, but i'm not sure if it's
going to happen or not.



- languages:
a smattering of german and afrikaans.
computer languages are another story [grins] :)

the.end :)



- other information:
contacting me:
email:

greywolf@serpentine.dynip.com

feel free to send comments about the bio to the above adress.

ps.  oh.  while he's sitting next to me, daddybear.waves.hi.at.the.rest.of
the.world ;)




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