|
Here's what's been going on withAvaWell first of all she's been getting mail. At first it was just little mentions as a part of my mail, but then she started getting stuff more dirrected to her than me. i contacted her and started sending letters her way. |
Hi Ava!You're a hit kiddo! Been getting mentions of you in most of my mail, all favorable! They love you! You have the honesty that so many miss on the net. i keep hearing that. Mostly it's been little snippets like, "I loved the Ava letters, keep it up!" and, "That Ava is really something special. Please thank her for me for being so forthright" and, "That Ava is great!" and like that. i've been meaning to write you and let you know, but today i got pretty much an "all Ava" letter and that's what i've been hoping to send to you. Here it is in it's entirety, enjoy - you've earned it!
Return-Path: DXK@aol.com (name maimed - see below)
Hi Shevette....
I wrote you a long time ago, when your page first came online... but my email was screwed up so I didn't get your reply back then.....
I am a 40-something year old Dom, living smack dab in the Midwest (as you apparantly are as well) I am presently sans sub, but spend a little time doing some training for new subs to keep them in the safety zone, and the rest of the time I work way too much :)
I wanted to tell you that I have consistantly enjoyed your web page. I really do get a kick out of it... it's a breath of fresh air compared to the other bondage or D/s pages that are there. Yours is much more real and much more fun. I hope you enjoy producing it at least half as much as I enjoy keeping up with it...
I have especially as of late enjoyed the Ava letters.... being in the midwest as both you and Ava are... I understand the difficulties of this lifestyle in finding a suitable partner. Ava did a brave thing in publishing her letters... even with the anonimity. And Shevette, you did a kind thing in putting them in your web pages. Please pass on my hellos to her.. and ... Ava... if you read this.... what you write about, and your feeling that you express... are very special. You showed that you are true to yourself in accepting yourself and your interests. I wish more ladies in the midwest would be as honest with themselves as you and shevette have been. Heck... if they were... I might have a lot more fun! :)
I'm sure that both of you are quite busy these days.... especially Ava with her new found online popularity....but take a moment to say hello to a Dom in the midwest. I would look forward to hearing from you.
Thank you again Shevette for some wonderfully fun web pages... and Ava I thank you for some great honesty in your letters.
Mxxx
..NOTE: SIR DXK OR SIR M I FOUND OUT/REMEMBERED WHY YOU DIDN'T GET MY REPLY BEFORE - OR NOW - THE RETURN ADDRESS YOU GIVE DOES NOT WORK! PLEASE, IF YOU READ THIS, RESPOND WITH A WAY I CAN CONTACT YOU. NIETHER AVA OR I CAN WRITE YOU AT THE ADDRESS YOU GAVE IN THIS LETTER.
So how's that? Do you feel good about yourself yet? The great part is you get to speak out in front of those who have maybe been denying the feelings they have inside. Face it; bondage can be pretty scary stuff! By breaking the steriotype that so many try to pander off on all of us we help to bring to the light the fact that these are perfectly normal feelings that are healthy. That's what i mean when i say that the goal of my site is to PROMOTE BONDAGE!Thanks again and please feel free to send more, your adoring fans await (and i'm one of 'em!)
Kisses
Master Chris' slave shevette
Hi Ava!
Hi, shevette!
Wow, I was just routinely checking my mail before I went to bed . . . I had no intention of writing to anyone -- I'm pretty wiped out (a day full of making job contacts -- I may open my own shop after graduation)! But after this, I couldn't not write SOMETHING . . .
That's right, you should write me something! Giggle. i am very happy about the way this is turning out. It answers the part of me that screams for no one to feel repressed about bondage the way i was durring my younger years! If only i had that time back again....
Having this kind of response does make me feel very special! I had no idea I could have that kind of effect. Of course, being in my profession has a lot to do with moving people with words, but I considered this something entirely different.
You are special! Not to detract from that, but have you ever thought about how each of us is - special. The tendancy is to say, "that person is like me" and just assume that we are all the same and that kind of leads to a hum-drum kinda thing. Actually the other person is just like you or me, BUT that person is a PERSON and that's pretty special! The other person is fabuliously special and since that person is like that and we are like the other person so you and i are fantastically special too! We all are! It's so great when we can stand up, do our little thing and, guess what, it hits a cord in someone else! Some of us are like a catylist that allows the special part of someone else come out. That's what you have done for me. i have been feeling so emersed in bondage that the rest of me has been drowning. Too much of any one thing is always too much no matter how good that thing is. You have allowed me to re-release the rest of myself, the part that isn't the tied up woman on the floor. We all have many facets. Thanks for being who you are and sharring that. It's a very good thing that you are doing!
A funny thing -- I had one of my closest friends read some of what I wrote to you . . . some of the encouragement I've gotten from you has let me open up a little bit, at least to people I really trust. When she read, she was obviously shocked . . . when she looked at me, I got a little scared, because I thought I might have blown her whole opinion of me. But what she said was, "You ought to be a romance novelist!"
i remember once revealing a part of my bondage side to someone by accident. i don't remember the whole incident, but i had just let a word slip where it was reasonably easy for her to discern what i had not meant to say. i remeber all the blood leaving my brain and the world tilting as i struggled to come up with something to hide what i had let slip. Thankfully i didn't stutter out loud (not too loud anyway) before she said something to let me know that what i had said was alright, understood, but alright. i guess that's what a friend is...
It turns out that these feelings and interests are not strange to her, after all.
That's the kicker! Almost EVERYONE has these feelings! i read a survey once that predicted that 95% of Americans have bondage thoughts. You know how cops are suposed to keep a stern eye on themselves and how they use their handcuffs. i met one in real life that was very much into using them on willing victums for bondage. i've met two on the net who also like handcuff bondage. All three seperate their job from their sport which kinda makes me feel better, still it would be very erotic to have one of these three men "arrest" me!i'm getting off the point (great fantasy going in my mind right now!) If even people who use handcuffs as a part of their job can keep it straight when bondage is an erotic form of foreplay and when it's needed to protect someone then i think the amount of bondage thought going on in the average person's head must be fantastic! The question is; why do we all have to hide it so much.
Well, hide is probably wise - to keep people away who might not be welcome. Maybe i should say; why do we have to feel like it's shameful? i guess it's for the same set of reasons that sex is generally associated with shame.
Actually it's the fact that we keep it from the relatives or the kids like when we also keep it from them when we owe some bills, or have an uncle who drinks too much. Since everything else we keep from them is in some way dirty then we somehow associate sex with those other things and it too becomes dirty. Think of some explicet sexual act and that's just got to be eplicetly dirty - by association!
Yep, all people are special, and we're all funny too!
She hasn't tried anything yet, but she said she's always wondered what it would be like, and she was glad she was able to live it a little bit through what I wrote. We spent a long time talking about it, and I tried to explain everything I felt. We ended up crying over past loves in the end -- but it was the good kind of crying.
"Tears: the water to wash the soul."
I think she may want to try being tied up. She kept asking about ways that work -- does it hurt to lie on your arms, and things like that. I think she may want to see how it might feel. I didn't want to tie her up (and she didn't ask directly), because I think it would have made me very uncomfortable. Right now, bondage is something so overwhelmingly sensual and sexual for me, that I can't imagine doing it with a woman. I don't think she was intitating any kind of sexual epidsode; she just wanted to try being tied up. But I can't separate bondage and sex in my mind (or anywhere else) right now.
Sex with another woman is very good - it satisfies something that sex with a man never addresses.j has moved in with me so we can have fun together and explore bondage. We kinda fell in love - in a way.
We both still prefer sex with a man and while the sex we have is a lark we are both very very worried about what will happen when one of us finds Mr. Right. i don't think we'll share him and since the odds on one of us getting stuck alone (for some period of time) are excellent we live in a fear of the day when one of us does get lucky. That is the pitfall in same sex loving - it probably won't last. Be aware of the pain that might come later. Maybe when the time comes for me and j to part it will all be fine, i hope so, but i doubt it. Please be careful... don't get hurt.
I'm SOOO tired, I'm going to fall asleep right now and end up with a lot of little Russian-looking letters on my forehead. I have to go to sleep -- but I promise I'll write more soon! Apparently, I owe it to my public. Imagine me, a net icon! :)
Love to hear more. Your public awaits! Giggle. This net icon thing... i kinda takes you by surprise when it happens, huh? i think that what makes it happen is just being yourself and doing what you like to do.
As for Mxx, I enjoyed his letter, and I appreciate what he said about me. He writes well, too, and that's a big plus.
Aggghhhh! When Sir Mxx wrote he mentioned that he had first wrote me years ago, but i had never responded to him. That made me feel bad because i do try to respond to everyone. When the site first opened i could do that pretty easy because i had the time and the number of visitors was not as high as now. That made me feel even worse so i wrote him telling him that i had forwarded his letter to you and apoligizing for not responding before - i even sent him a pic i had just made. Today his letter came back "Undeliverable". Now i remember him!This happens from time to time. i may be able to post a messge to him. i had a Sir Jerry that used to send me pics before, but i never could get anthing i sent to him delivered. Finally i posted a notice for him to write me and send a valid return address. It worked! Hopefully, i can do that again with him. ARE YOU READING THIS SIR MXXX? (name maimed)
So, goodnight, but I hope you know how much this has been a help to me.
i just hope you have an idea how much help you have been to a lot of people. On a good day i can get 5.000 visitors to the site so lottsa people see these things. You are doing a good thing for all of us, thank you. i would like to include our last two letters. i plan to maime anything that refers to you being in the profession you are in.
"Ava"
Kisses
Master Chris' slave shevetteHere's another letter you got
Received From: TS
To: shevette@geocities.com
Subject: Comments for you and ava
Content-Type: text/plain; charset=us-asciiWell............How do you answer the things in your past that cause such doubt and discomfort? I wish there was a magic book of answers that we could refer to, but, in the end, all we really have is ourselves. This may not be very comforting, but the things which make you up are born out of the crucible of experience and regret, and from the letters you choose to share with those of us who would read and attempt to understand, I believe that two extraordinary women have been born. (I have to admit I'm not usually this verbose, but you do have me very impressed.) I don't think I have had quite the troubles you did, but my experience of being raised deep in the bible belt by a "June Cleaver" style made my discovery of a love for doing and receiving bondage quite difficult. (Makes you wonder if it's genetic.. I loved tying and being tied LONG before I hit puberty...What's a guy to do?) To be honest, I'm not quite sure why I'm writing this, or even if you'll respond, but there seems to be something.....(BTW, I am happily married with a family...pretty safe...but I need someone to talk to...My wife indulges me, but there's something not quite there...I think that's what I'm looking to talk about..If I can figure out what it is...) Could/would either of you ladies be willing to speak with me?
This is my real e-mail address.. I can be reached by a reply or by mail directed to xxxx@hotmail.com
(GREAT website!!!!!!!!!)
I have been a little giddy about the attention I've been getting! I almost feel like some sort of advice columnist or resident expert or something like that (which is funny, because I've always despised celebrities who go and testify in front of big panels or boards of inquiry about subjects they know nothing about, but they're taken seriously just because they're famous). One thing is certain -- I'm no expert here!
But it's fun, nonetheless. I have to confess, I'm going to be a little short on new bondage stories, since, as happens so often to me, the holidays brought the end of another romantic relationship. Don't shed a tear, because I haven't -- it was a mistake from the beginning, and I probably knew that.
I have, however, been doing a little bit of experimenting in
self-bondage. My roommate has been gone for the holiday break, and I've
had a lot time by myself here. One morning, not too long ago, I started
playing with the belt on my bathrobe, winding my hands up in it. I had
both hands twisted up, and, of course, the robe fell open. The cold air
hit my legs, and I knew I was on to something.
I have figured out some ways to tie myself up pretty effectively. I can tie a piece of rope to a bed post, and make a slip knot on the other end of the rope. Then, all I have to do is put my hands through the loop and pull! It's not perfect, but I also figured out how to tighten the knot with a few wraps around the loop, between my wrists. If I tie my legs first, I can feel like I'm completely helpless.
With variations on this, I've figured out how to tie my hands behind my back (which is my favorite way). It's a little loose and I know I can escape, but it's fun to sit and watch TV like that. But there was a knock on the door one day, and someone at the door can hear the TV, so I had to sit abolutely still. Scary, but exciting, of course!
I have been visiting a lot of sites dealing with bondage, and I do say a lot of the pictures get me really worked up. Perhaps you know something of this feeling, but when I'm cold and dispassionate, the pictures of nipple clips and other sorts of torture repulse me. But once I start to heat up a little, it doesn't seem so bad. The infamous "man of my past" I told you so much about once brought me to climax four times just by biting lightly on my nipples -- slowly, over the span of hours. Even right now, as I type this, I'm turned off by the idea of nipple torture, but I know my ideas will change given the proper atmosphere.
Something I've determined is that I like bondage art -- and there's a lot of it out there! Some of it is pretty sick and twisted and quite beyond anything I could be remotely interested in. ("Less is more" is very much my bondage credo!) But some of it is so erotic! A lot the Brian Tarsis art is so fascinating -- he has a knack for coming up with scenarios that, if they don't want to actually live them out, women will fantasize about.
And your artwork is adorable! For some reason, I'm reminded of Josie and the Pussycats when I see your work -- and that's a good thing, believe me! I always wanted to be one of them, when I was a kid.
Which brings me to a request. I know you're way behind on requests as it is, but if you ever find the time, I'd love it if you'd draw a scene from something I've written to you. First, I'd love to see some of your work dedicated to me, but more than that, I'd like to see what impressions people take from what I write -- I want to see if the picture I've painted in their minds is close to what I had in my own mind when I wrote. Don't break your neck to do it, but if you find the time, I'd really enjoy it!
Anything you think might be of interest to your readers, you can post unless I ask you not to. You already said you'll take the precautions to keep me anonymous, and I appreciate that. So far, you've done well.
About the police officers you mentioned -- I have to admit, I've had a lot of fantasies lately about being held down and tied up, more roughly than before. It has been sensual and very erotic, but lately I think it would be very stimulating to be a little less willing when the tie-up begins than I have been -- to really be forced into submission. That would be hard to coordiante, though -- there would have to be a LOT of communication long before it ever happened, just to make sure we're on the same page. I know, safe words or not, that I'd be very uncomfortable tying someone up who was struggling against it, and I don't think I'd want to put someone else in that position until I knew him very, very well.
That's all for now -- but there will be more . . .
Ava
Dear Ava!i've posted some of your letters at
http://geocities.datacellar.net/WestHollywood/Village/4800/ava02html Right now there is no outside link to this page. Would you please CUT&PASTE the above address into your browser and have a look. i want you to be sure that i have not revealed too much about you.
RE; Married men. You are correct in wanting to avoid getting into an adultious position by becoming a target for their fantasies. i believe that someday i will marry and i will be 100% faithful to my man, If i were to allow a man to be unfaithful to his wife then i would be worried that some other woman would be doing the same to my man all through my married life. That's not completely logical, but it's how i feel. "Do onto others as you would have them do onto you!" i believe in talking with married men, but not in a context where i would be "the other woman."
i'm sorry to hear about your break up. It's hard, i know. If you need someone to listen please count me in. i know there's nothing i can say to stop the pain, but sometimes it helps just to have someone to talk to.
So you are trying self bondage, huh? Feels kinda weird, doesn't it? It can feel so cold going into it but once you get started it can be like nothing else in this world! Here's a project for you: go buy yourself a pair of handcuffs. Sounds pretty scary, doesn't it? That's half of what makes it so great! You can be a wimp about it and go to K-Mart to the toys section and get a pair of $4.95 kids handcuffs. They are metal, have a "safety release" that doesn't require a key, and they are cheep. A minor adventure! They aren't very comfortable to wear, but they work and you can learn from them. i keep a good pair of handcuffs in my purse all the time - "just in case."
Even if you go to a regular store and get toy handcuffs you can still have fun. Just because you saw them on the way in the door you can still go up to one of the guys in the store and ask where they are. If you are feeling bold ask how they work, can you take them out of the package, try them on, ect.
If you think that's too tame go to a pawn shop and buy a pair - be sure you have a guy salesperson. Try on several different types. If you are like me they will fit pretty loose even when the rachet is tightened up as far as it will go. Check out the hinged handcuffs - don't buy them as your first pair of handcuffs though. While they really do a good bondage job they are most uncomfortable and may be impossible to get off without help. Whatever you do, be sure to have fun with the guy behind the counter. Some of them will just melt while other get so nervious they can barely talk. Most will tell you a story of something they did with handcuffs. It's worth the $30 - $40 the handcuffs cost just to see the reaction of the saleperson.
i've only had one bad time when i went to buy a set of handcuffs. i wasn't able to get a guy, this co-ed cutie came over to help me. Actually i was trying to buy my first pair of legirons. They only had one pair and they were cheep cheep cheep -How cheep? So cheep that they didn't work! You could close them but the key wouldn't open them. Miss Air-Head behind the counter finally discovered she could open them by running the rachet all the way through. Duh! Then she decided to demonstrate that they worked fine by putting them on her legs. Oh yeah, they went on fine, but how do you get them off if the key doesn't work? You don't! One side worked but her other leg was held captive. She called the sales manager and told me they could order me a pair and they'd be in stock in a day or two. Like i wanted to be like her.., trying to figure out how to get those things off of me!
i think about her from time to time and wonder what happened after i left. She may not have been such a cloud-jockey after all..... i wonder..... Giggle
RE: Nipple clamps. i have never had the real thing put on me, just clothes pins - one per side. OUCH! They will make you see stars girl! Whew! Very intense! i like it every once in awhile. i do not allow them on a regular basis however, some of those women look like they had the dog chew on their nipples! Maybe that goes away, i don't know. The point is i have nice boobs and i intent to keep 'em that way!
Had that thing of being self-bound and someone knocking on the door. Yeowch! Scary! Yep my tv was going too. They hollered, and knocked on the door forever. i just slipped off of the couch and hid behind it - my keys were in the bedroom!
Bondage art can be quite an aphrodisiac! For me, for a long time, it was my only bondage outlet. Next came writting bondage fantasies in my diary, actually that's why i began a diary! You should see it! It's illustrated! If i had a scanner and could scan in all of those pics and stories i'd probably melt down the whole net! Giggle
Yas, Josie and the Pussycats were favs of mine too! Love the style they used on that. They used to have a cartoon series on tv. i only got to see it once. They were after some evil villan who had this gun that shot some kind of spongie thingum that when it hit you would wrap itself around you and kinda tie you up and get tighter and tighter... Melody looked good like that - of course i associated myself with Josie - we both have red hair... The guys on that kinda sucked though...
A pic for you? Well, i dunno. Awww what the hey! Since it's you, Ava! Here's a quick one that i did. i want to do a much better one of you. Maybe you can do the "buying the handcuffs" thing, describe it, and i can do one of that. If you want just describe you doing something that you'd like to see illustrated. i owe you!
Kisses
Master Chris' slave shevettePS: You mentioned rough sex/bondage. That makes me wild! i don't do too much of it because i've found it cam make me feel too... it makes me feel.... i find it makes me feel "abused". Kinda. Too much can take away from my self esteem. i feel cheep, used, roughed-up. A little goes a long way yet when i want it rough i really enjoy it rough! Go figure... i guess it takes a mixture. Sometimes i want to feel fragile and delicate and sometimes i want to struggle like crazy - with no hope of winning! Tickeling is nice too... that's hard to volunteer for, but when it happens it's envigorating! There are so many types of bondage, so many ways to share, so much loving to give and recieve... so little time! Giggle
PPS: i was serious about that wanting to talk on that break up. i've been there and know what it can be like... crying jags and all...
This page hosted by
Get your own Free Home Page