As Jessie says, "Paranoia, thy name is Whoser." And so...

I'm a Whoser, not a stalker,
I find 'Whose Line' is really funny.
It makes my day a bit sunny
To have a really good laugh, you see.

Want to meet the players 'cause
I hear that they are nothing but saintly
And though my fear calls out faintly
I'm just excited about that day, then it's here,
And that's when I get scared.

I'm so nervous I'm not well,
If it goes wrong, I'll be in hell.

Been down to L.A. and found
The studio where they do their taping.
It leaves me gasping and gaping.
I can't wait to see it on TV.

I am a wreck from nerves
And I'm afraid that when we meet they won't like me.
I worry they'll think I'm crazy
And if I blow my first chance I might not get another.

I'm so nervous I'm not well,
If it goes wrong, I'll be in hell.
I'm so nervous I'm not well,
I hope and pray it all goes well.

I wanna shake their hand
I think that would be grand.
I wanna tell them that
Their humor makes me feel fine.
Their improv is sublime,
I smile all the time.
It frees my mind...
They free my mind...

Ahhhhhhh............

Paranoia, paranoia!
Will they brush me off when I greet them?
Refuse to let me meet them?
And will I ever learn to be bold?
Hear the voices in my head
"Go talk to them before it gets too late,
And they slip out through the back gate."
The agony and the fear, you see, they're killing me.

I'm so nervous I'm not well,
If it goes wrong, I'll be in hell.
I'm so nervous I'm not well,
I hope and pray it all goes well....

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