Author's note: This story follows the fanfic timeline beginning in "Family Ties", created by Phantom, a fellow tf fanfic writer. Her fanfics can be found here My thanks to her for the initial stamp of approval and allowing me the use of her character, Andromeda.  Nova is my character.

This story is rated 'R' for language and certain conversation. You have been warned!

Onto the story!

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Chapter 4

"Nova, open the door, it's Rodimus Prime."

"Just leave me alone!"

Rodimus had been standing outside of Nova's personal quarters for the last ten minutes, begging for her to come out. "Nova, please. First Aid needs to see you now."

"No." She was crying again. Rodimus sighed. He hadn't met anyone, especially a femme, who could cry as much as she did.

Rodimus screwed up his courage. "Alright, if you won't come out, then I'm coming in."

"NO! Wait!" Nova's cry came too late, Rodimus had forced his way in. Nova was sitting on her recharge bed, clutching something against her chest.

"Nova?"

"Why do you keep trying to help me? I've left the Autobots."

"I'm only here to tell you that First Aid needs to see you."

"You did that before you forced your way in here."

"You're crying again." Rodimus deflected the question.

"Gee, I wonder why." she snapped. She looked away from him. "I'll see First Aid when I finish packing."

"It sounded urgent."

"You're not my guardian! Stop treating me like a child!"

"I will when you stop acting like one!"

Nova burst into more tears and lay down on the bed. "It doesn't matter anymore. Nothing does. I've lost everything I ever loved."

Rodimus was *very* worried now. He opened a commlink to First Aid. "First Aid, she's not moving from her bed."

"Rodimus, I don't care HOW she gets back to Cybertron, but she HAS to get here."

"Understood." Rodimus shut off the comm. "Ok, you." he looked down at Nova. "I have no choice."
he picked up Nova's limp form, whatever she'd been holding dropped back onto the bed.

Nova had stopped crying and didn't fight Rodimus to put her down.

They arrived at the Infirmary on Cybertron about a half hour after landing.

Rodimus plunked the still limp form of Nova down in a chair in front of First Aid's desk. She curled up, her knees touching her chin, her arms wrapped around her legs.

First Aid came in and greetings were exchanged. Nova refused to say anything.

"I'll leave now." Rodimus stood up.

"Under the circumstances, Rodimus," First Aid loooked at Nova out of the corner of his optics, "I think you'd better stay."

Rodimus sat down again. He could tell now that something was *very* wrong.

First Aid continued. "I've done the autopsy on the baby. The cause of death was *not* lack of energy as I previously thought."

Nova cringed. Rodimus had the urge to reach out in compassion and squeeze her hand, but he held back.

"The baby had an advanced from of Corrodonucleosis."

Rodimus sucked in a breath and Nova buried her head in her knees. Rodimus, and obviously Nova had heard of it. It had never affected the Autobots, (no cases of Decepticons getting it had been reported) because, as Ratchet and First Aid pointed out, they had very good genes, whatever *that* meant. However, they all figured that was a good thing, because a cure was never found for this rare disease.

"I took samples of your Energon to check your health after the birth. You've got it as well, although in the very early stages, Nova. I'm sorry."

Nova didn't move at this news.

"You knew, didn't you?" Rodimus had already deduced.

Nova slowly unfolded herself and got up from the chair. Walking over to the window, she said, "My mate had it."

Rodimus and First Aid looked over at her in surprise. This was the first time she'd even mentioned anything about her personal life.

"I knew he had it. He told me himself. I didn't care though. I loved him all the same, wanted to be with him for whatever time he had left. We bonded and..." she trailed off, Rodimus and First Aid got the idea.

"I went all over the galaxy looking for doctors who knew about the disease, but none of them could help Blazer. Finally, they just told me to give up, just concentrate my focus on him. When I became pregnant, we were so happy. We knew the risks that I most likely had contracted the disease and possibly the baby had as well..."

"Oh Primus..." Rodimus whispered.

"I saw my love slip into a coma only a few days after I told him I was pregnant. Then he finally died three days later."

First Aid had to choke back tears now. What this poor femme had gone through!

Rodimus now realized what she'd meant earlier when she said she'd lost everything she loved. No wonder she was so sad. She lost everything she knew, to be alone in the world all of the sudden in the most tragic way...

"I didn't want to join the Autobots at first. But as I told Rodimus, you were the ones handing out the most Energon. I wanted my baby to live and grow up healthy..." Nova bowed her head. "I guess I don't need to worry about that anymore." Tears fell down her cheeks. "I don't know how to go on! I don't know how I can live without either of them in my life anymore. Especially Blazer. We'd known each other for ages before we bonded. We told each other everything..." She fell to her knees and covered her face with her hands.

First Aid was hesistant to reveal what else he'd found out, but he felt it necessary. When she'd calmed down a bit, he said, "Nova, generally the Corrodonucleosis spreads pretty fast. Once a robot contracts it, they have less than two Earth years to live."

Nova nodded. "Blazer only lived about that after being diagnosed."

"I also noticed that in both you and the baby the disease did not spread as quickly as it generally does in normal robots."

"I think...I think I can explain that..." Nova said quietly. "I was born on Tronus. My father was an Autobot and my mother was a Lithonian. I'm basically a hybrid of both their races."

Rodimus sat up in his seat. An Autobot was her father?

"When I went to visit some relatives on Lithone, I met Blazer by accident after running into him at an electronics shop. We hit it off and he finally moved out to Tronus with me. Probably a good thing he did because of Unicron..."

Rodimus remembered the robot he'd met...Kranix. Right before he was murdered by the Quintessons, he'd said he was a Lithonian, too, before Unicron had eaten the planet...

"We got bonded the night Unicorn attacked Lithone. We'd both lost a lot of relatives, and Blazer didn't want to regret not bonding with me if something happened to either of us." She shook her head; she was side-tracking. "Anyway, Lithones are susceptible to Corrodonucleosis. They were never able to find any really good treatments to prevent or halt it altogether. Just something to slow it down."

"But since you're also half-Autobot, the disease has slowed down even more because of your genetic makeup. But your baby didn't have a fully developed immune system, so it couldn't fight the disease properly." First Aid understood now.

Nova stood up, looking like she'd made an important decision. "It doesn't matter." Nova said softly. "I don't want to live anymore."

Rodimus jumped up. "YOU CAN'T SAY THAT!"

"Can't I?" Nova turned angrily to him. "I lost everything I loved, Rodimus. I want to be with them again. I killed my baby because I was foolish to believe I could survive on so little Energon and that I might not pass the disease to it. I just want to be one with the Matrix, be with Blazer again!"

"Both of you calm down!" First Aid ordered, even more upset at the turn of events. "Nova, you cannot believe any of this is your fault. You didn't know you had the disease when you were pregnant, and you didn't know the baby had it. You did everything you could by coming back here for help. So did Rodimus when he left the Energon for you. Neither of you is to blame for this."

"First Aid?" Nova asked softly. "Please let me be with Blazer again. You have the power to do it. You can speed up the disease's life span and -"

First Aid and Rodimus looked horrified. "Nova...I can't do that." the medic said, trying hard to find his voice.

"YES, YOU CAN!" she yelled. "I saw how much pain Blazer was in for so very long! I don't want to die the same way! The difference is me dying God knows when in so much pain, or right now...with one little needle."

First Aid shook his head. "That goes against everything I believe in, I can't..."

Rodimus didn't think she could do it, but Nova began crying again. "All I want is peace..." Her head shot up to face both of them. "And if you won't give it to me, then I'll find it for myself!" Quick as a wink, she'd raced to the door, opened it, and was transforming into her car mode as she zoomed down the hall.

"Shit." Rodimus jumped up after her. "Teletran Three won't accept my commands since I've been taken off duty so I can't shut the city down, and you don't have the authority...Shit, I'll have to go after her!" Rodimus transformed and raced after her leaving a worried medic behind.

"Shitshitshitshitshit..." Rodimus sang to himself. He turned on his comm link. "Blaster? This is Rodimus Prime."

"Yo! Rodimus! What's the haps?"

"Blaster, we've got a situation that requires your skill. Get Ultra Magnus, Springer, and most DEFINITELY Arcee on the horn and tell them all to meet me at my coordinates, following my signal!"

"Sure thing, Rodimus!"

Rodimus ignored him, hoping he'd just get the job done. Then he patched into Nova's frequency. If he could just get her to answer, talk to her, maybe get her to realize...."Nova?"

No answer.

"Nova?"

"Nova, come on, we need to talk!"

No answer again. Of COURSE all his tracking equipment would be disabled RIGHT now. "Rodimus to Optimus."

"Optimus here, and I can already tell by your tone that something's wrong."

"We have a situation."

"Don't we always?"

"We wouldn't if my tracking equipment hadn't been shut off." Rodimus spat back hotly. "Listen, Nova's gone off the deep end. She's gonna try to kill herself. I don't have time to get into the details but we HAVE to find her."

"I'll have Teletran Three work on tracking her and get back to you. Prime out."

"Shit, where could she have gone?" Rodimus muttered angrily.

Springer hailed him on the comm link as he appeared above in the sky in helicopter mode. "Buddy, you'd better have a damn good reason why you got me out of a fantastic recharge session with Arcee."

"It's Nova..."

"Aw, shit, what'd you do to her now? I swear to Primus if Arcee comes home tonight in a bad mood because of you -"

"You heard him, Rodimus!" Arcee cut in as she caught up to them. "If you've done something to that poor girl -"

"WOULD YOU BOTH KINDLY SHUT UP? SHE WANTS TO KILL HERSELF BECAUSE SHE'S GOT AN INCURABLE DISEASE! WE HAVE TO FIND HER BEFORE SHE DOES IT. IS THAT UNDERSTOOD?!"

There was silence.

"I CAN'T HEAR YOU TWO!"

"Yes, sir." Springer and Arcee snapped out rather grudgingly.

"Good."

"Rodimus, it's Optimus. Teletran Three located her about 20 miles west from your coordinates now. She's not moving."

Rodimus almost stopped. That wasn't really an inhabited part of Cybertron.She could just have run out of gas...maybe she was taking a rest...maybe she realized this wasn't the way to die...

Rodimus fuel pump hammered against his steel chest. He knew better. He knew she'd have kept going to get away and die alone...She'd either run into serious trouble, or ... Rodimus just hoped she was still alive.

"Come on!" he shouted to the others. "Nova's in trouble!"

All three stepped up their speed, Rodimus still attempting to hail Ultra Magnus with little luck. "Blaster, where is Ultra Magnus? Why hasn't he answered my communications?"

"Rodimus he radioed back saying he didn't want to be disturbed for the rest of the day..."

"Rodimus, I'll tell you bloody why I haven't answered!" Ultra Magnus cut in over the radio.

"Magnus! Where the hell are you? We need you out here!" Rodimus was beginning to sound desperate.

"Like hell I'm gonna go running around after you again Rodimus. You've got yourself into this mess and if you can't get yourself out, too bad! Springer, Arcee, you are released from your duties to Rodimus. He is no longer an Autobot leader and holds no authority."

Rodimus didn't have time to go back and beat the snot out of Magnus. He'd do that later. Springer and Arcee had stopped, Rodimus sensing he wasn't being followed anymore by his comrades, made a sharp 180 degree turn to face them.

"So after everything we've been through together, you're just going to abandon me like this because the *almighty* Ultra Magnus said to."

Arcee almost cringed. "You don't have any authority..."

"So I don't! It didn't stop you from getting up off your asses and finding me! You didn't have to do that because you KNEW what position I'm in and yet you still did! And what about Nova? You haven't even heard her side of the story - she might not even get to tell it to you because she's somewhere out there alone and dying!"

"You don't know she's dying, Rod." Springer affirmed.

"She said she'd kill herself in front of both of First Aid and myself so she wouldn't die in pain from the Corrodonucleosis! I have a pretty good idea she's intending to carry out that threat. If neither of you will go for me, go for her, PLEASE. If not, then go back to Iacon and be the cowards Magnus wants you to be. I'll try to save Nova by myself, but neither of us will return to the Autobots ever again."

"Rodimus." Arcee said softly. He really meant it! Neither she or Springer moved, either on Magnus's orders or just out of shock hearing Rodimus' words, as the former Autobot raced away in the direction Optimus had given him.

Fifteen miles later he reached her. She was sitting under the shadow a large piece of overhanging schrapnel, optics closed. Was he too late?

He slowly came up to her and transformed. She opened her eyes slowly and looked at him. "Rodimus..."

Rodimus looked down at her and realized why she looked like she was about to pass out. Her arms, she'd...

"Oh no, no, no, no!" Rodimus said frantically. Energon was seeping out of her so fast that he was afraid to touch her. He didn't even know where to begin trying to patch her up, if he could even save her at this point!

"I'm sorry for making you all worry about me, wasting your resources on me..." she said softly. She was losing conciousness! She had to stay awake until help arrived. IF help arrived!

"Don't you DARE die on me Nova! Don't you try that! I'll yank you into Optimus's office for insubordination!" Rodimus cried.

"Sorr.." her optics closed this time for good, Rodimus still screaming her name.

"Nova!"

A brief pause.

"Nova!"

Nova slowly awoke again. Where was she? This place was totally unfamiliar to her.

"Nova. Thank goodness, we finally reached you."

Before her appeared, almost out of thin air, two robots.

"Blazer." She whispered as she recognized the first one, her bonded partner, the one who she fallen head over heels for so long ago. "Blazer it's really you!" she jumped up from her bed and clung to him, never wanting to let go. "I missed you so much." she sobbed into his chest. "It's so lonely out there without you by my side! Oh gods, I can't believe it's really you!"

Blazer held Nova as tightly as she held him. "I missed you too, Nova. I never wanted to leave you on purpose..."

"I know...you told me..." she was still crying softly. "We're together now though. Forever. I'll never let go of you again, not even Unicron could tear us apart now."

The robot next to them coughed. Nova, having forgotten there was someone else there, looked up in surprise. "Hello."

The robot smiled. "Hello, Nova. I've heard a great many things about you from Blazer."

"Do I...know you?" Nova cocked her head. "You look sort of familiar..."

The robot smiled. "Like Rodimus Prime?"

Nova nodded. "Yea, a lot like him, but not quite."

He smiled even more. "Nova, we realize that you are quite willing to accept a new life here with us, but we feel it not yet your time."

Nova was confused. "But...I don't want to be anywhere else except where Blazer is. Please don't make me leave him alone again!" Nova moved closer to Blazer. To her surprise, Blazer moved away a bit.

"As much as I want you to stay...I know you cannot. You do not belong in this world yet."

"Then where DO I belong?" Nova started a fresh batch of tears. "Living a miserable existence, living with the guilt over everything that I've done? I can't go back to that! I have to know you'll always be with me. I have to know you'll be near when I need you. Most of all, I need you to forgive me..."

"Nova." Blazer could not resist pulling her close again to console her. "You aren't going to live a miserable existence, because I will always be with you. Maybe not physically, but I will be there. I have been since..."

"Don't. I can't think of the pain you were in. I couldn't save you, or our baby..."

"You did everything you could, for both of us. First and foremost you didn't shy away from me when I told you I was ill. You loved me even though you knew eventually we would physically be apart. You went beyond the call of duty trying to find someone with a cure for me...I saw your spirit from day one, Nova, and that is why I couldn't stay away from you. Your beautiful spirit drew me to you. I still can't stay away from you. I *love* you. You think even death could stop me from doing that?"

Nova buried her head in his chest, just sobbing. "I love you, too." was all she could manage.

"There is nothing to forgive, Nova." the robot beside them said. Nova just lay her head against Blazer, stifling sobs. "Look."

It was only at Blazer's extra encouragement that Nova looked up. The Rodimus-look a-like was holding a tiny squirming bundle...

<-- Chapter 3 || Chapter 5 -->

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