Optimus glanced at the data pad that Rodimus held out. On the screen was a human male dressed in bikini briefs. “No way!” he exclaimed. “I refuse to wear any human clothing on this date!”
“Even better!” Roddy flickered an optic sensor in the equivalent of a wink.
“Roddy, you are disgusting! How can you turn everything into a perverted joke?”
“It's a talent.” The younger Prime grinned smugly.
Optimus sighed. “Look, Roddy, either help me or leave. Right now you're making me nervous.”
“Sure, sure,” Roddy mock-grumbled, taking a glob of way and smearing it over his friend's back. He wondered if he should write a dirty message in the wax….
“Don't you dare write anything back there!”
The flame-colored Autobot sighed. Optimus knew him too well! The last time that Roddy had helped him with a wax job, he had written 'Hot Stud' on his father's back, and had earned himself a week in the armory, cleaning weapons.
“So what are you guys going to do?”
Optimus busied himself with spreading the wax across his broad chest. “I figured I'd take her on an official tour of Metroplex, then go and see whatever's playing at the drive-in theater. I thought that would be a unique experience.”
“Ahhh…” Roddy breathed, making smooching noises. Optimus made a rude gesture.
“Oh, yes, I forgot to give this to you.”
Optimus wiped his hands on a cleansing cloth and took the miniscule box. He glimpsed the words TROJAN and wondered if it had to do anything with ancient Troy on Earth. Knowing Rodimus, probably not. He extended mini pincers from his fingertips and managed to extract a wrapped square. Curious, he opened the package and unfurled what looked like a deflated balloon. Roddy fell on the floor in a fit of giggles.
Optimus looked at him blankly. “A balloon, Roddy?”
Rodimus took a moment to respond, too overcome with hysterics. “No, Optimus! It's a form of contraception for the humans.”
“And you expect me to use this? This thing won't even fit over my little finger!”
Roddy hooted and fell over once more.
“Maybe it'll fit on your miniscule unit…” Optimus teased.
“Hey!” Rodimus exclaimed, pouting. “I inherited your schematics, so whatever I've got is from you! I've been meaning to thank you for that, by the way. I haven't received any complaints so far.” He preened.
Optimus threw the box at his chest. “Get rid of this!”
Roddy tried to put on a serious face, which always meant trouble. “Now Optimus, don't forget to use the safeties this time. You know what happens if you don't!” He gestured to himself as a demonstration. Forget the safeties, and you may well become a daddy.
Optimus turned his back on him. “Give it up, Roddy. I don't do that on the first date. Unlike you.”
Rodimus puffed out his chest. “Whatever the ladies want!”
“Well, I want you to get out so I can finish getting ready in peace!”
“Awww!” the young Autobot pouted but left as he was told.
Optimus shook his head, chuckling at his young son's antics. Rodimus was just trying to loosen him up a bit. His antics had helped, to a small degree. He was still a tad nervous, but not on the verge of snapping, as he had been before.
“It's just a date!” he told himself out loud as he walked to Andromeda's quarters, trying to give himself a pep talk. A few 'bots in the hallway stopped to gape. Optimus talked to himself on occasion, but that didn't make it any less bizarre.
'Were things ever this difficult with Alita?' he asked himself. He realized, with a shock, that it had been. Starting the relationship had been easy – they had booth been young and rather foolish, but taking it to the next level had been awkward for him, especially once he became the almighty Autobot leader.
He felt a sudden, unexpected pang at the thought of his beloved. They had made a pact to each other – if one died, the other would go on and find someone else. Optimus had taken the pact reluctantly, never honestly wanting to obey it. And now, here he was, ready to start a new relationship. 'Do you approve, Alita?' he asked her in his mind, knowing he would never receive a response. 'I hope you don't feel betrayed or jealous.' He loved her with all of his spark, and always would, but she was never coming back. He had mourned her for over a century, and it was now time for him to move on.
Trying to force the nervous jumble of thoughts from his head, he rang the chime for her door and waited. She emerged right away, and Optimus was momentarily speechless. She had done – something – that had made her look even more beautiful than before! For a few fleeting moments, all he could do was gape. “You look great,” he managed to breathe finally.
“So do you,” she replied, looking his polished form up and down. He always looked good – as the Autobot leader and representative of his people, he always tried to look his best – but now he looked magnificent! Won't the femmes be jealous of her!
“Ready?” he asked politely, offering his arm. She took it happily and let him lead her to the shuttle bay.
“Since this is a special occasion, I thought we'd take my private shuttle.”
“Private shuttle?” she echoed. She didn't know he had a private shuttle!
“Yes. I share it with Rodimus now, actually. We don't use it very often. It's mostly used for diplomatic missions, but it can hold its own in a battle.” He led her to a small but well-kept craft. It bore the Autobot sigil and an image of the Matrix. He stepped aside, letting her board first, then followed suit.
She gazed around the shuttle's small interior, clearly captivated. The shuttle was small but comfortable, equipped with a recharging berth that folded into the wall, a stereo, an Energon dispenser, and a small collection of CDs and holo-novels. The femme laughed, and Optimus followed her gaze. Roddy had hung a pair of fuzzy dice from the viewport. Optimus assumed the pilot's chair and began the pre-launch check while Andromeda seated her self in the co-pilot's seat. She watched Prime's movements with great interest – she had served some long tours in space but had never learned to pilot a shuttle. Noticing her curiosity, Optimus patiently explained each phase of the launch preparation.
“Control to Prime One,” the shuttle's comm. line crackled to life. “You are cleared for launch.”
“Prime One to Control,” Optimus radioed back. “Proceeding with launch.”
The femme gripped the armrests in eager anticipation as Optimus Prime slowly guided the shuttle out of the docking bay, heading for the warp gate that lead to Earth's solar system. “Up, up, and away!” she cheered as Cybertron became a rapidly receding dot behind them.
Once they were on course, Optimus set the autopilot and headed over to the stereo system. Examining the small pile of CDs, he turned on the system. Jarring heavy metal vibrated throughout the shuttle, and both occupants covered their audials. Optimus fumbled with the stereo and finally managed to turn off the offending noise. “I'll never understand Roddy's interest in this junk,” he sighed. “Here, this will be easier to listen to.” Soon the air was filled with strains of a human's crooning tones.
“What is this?” Andromeda asked in curiosity.
“It's a collection of soft rock hits from Earth during the 1980s. I listened to this sort of music when I first came back online on Earth in order to understand the culture. A lot of it is quite pleasant. A lot better than what Rodimus listens to..” Listening to the lyrics, Andromeda agreed that it was quite pleasant. Optimus, of course, had neglected to mention that it was a collection of love songs.
Prime returned to his seat and took the controls as the small shuttle approached the warp gate. Andromeda gasped as the gate opened, fiery tendrils of energy licking at the corners, and the ship was swallowed up and spat out on the other side. Here, the alignment of the stars and planets was completely different. A smile tinged her lip components. Space was always so beautiful, and she was grateful for this private view, as opposed to being jostled on the always-crowded commuter shuttle to Earth.
Optimus snuck a sideways glance at her. She was like a kid in a candy store, gaping at everything at once. They hadn't even arrived yet! He was glad that she was having so much fun. It made him feel good. He hadn't been on a date in so long, and while he looked calm on the outside, on the inside he was shaking.
Turning back to the controls, Prime plotted a course to Earth. In a few short minutes, the shuttle was creating a fiery trail as it entered Earth's atmosphere. “Prime One to Metroplex Control,” he radioed.
“This is Metroplex Control,” a voice responded. “Prime One, you are cleared for launch. Proceed to docking port seventeen.”
Andromeda was disappointed that the trip was over, but she watched, fascinated nonetheless, as Optimus expertly piloted the shuttle in for a perfect landing. 'He's quite talented,' she observed. He had no doubt picked up a lot of skills in his long life. To her, he was a mystery just begging to be explored. She fervently hoped that she would get the chance.
Ultra Magnus raced in to the shuttle bay as they emerged from the craft. “Optimus Prime! I didn't know you were coming….” His voice trailed off as he caught sight of the female by Prime's side. His optics widened so much that Prime feared they'd burst. “Ah, I see,” the city commander observed, rubbing his chin thoughtfully.
“Hello, Magnus,” Optimus greeted his friend warmly. The two clasped hands.
“I didn't know you were coming,” Magnus murmured quietly. “I take it this is a personal visit…?”
“I wanted to give her the special tour,” Optimus whispered back. “Sorry I didn't inform you, but it wasn't a business trip. I didn't think it was important.” From the questioning looks he was getting, he gathered that Magnus was very interested.
“Well, I could show you – erm, never mind,” Magnus said hastily as Optimus glared at him. So it was a date! 'I'll be damned!' The city commander eyed his female companion. 'He certainly has good taste!'
“Well, you two have fun,” Magnus said, still trying to register the fact that his long-time friend was actually dating. “Let me know if you need anything.”
“We will, Magnus. Goodbye.” Optimus took his date's arm and directed her out of the shuttle chamber, leaving Ultra Magnus shaking his head. Who'd 'a thought?
“So Ultra Magnus is an old friend of yours?” Andromeda asked as they headed down the corridor.
“Yes. We go way back, to the Golden Age of Cybertron. We were both different back then. Young and foolish. That all changed when the Decepticons attacked.” His voice grew bitter. “Nothing was the same afterward.”
Sensing that it was a sore subject, she asked, “So where are we headed first?”
“I thought we'd start with the command center and work our way outward from there.”
The tour passed uneventfully, with Optimus narrating and Andromeda gaping at everything. The city itself was impressive, but this was also a living Transformer! They ended up in the auxiliary control room – Optimus explained regretfully that the main control room was off-limits. The femme struggled to understand how Metroplex worked. “How does he energize?” she wondered. “Does he ever recharge?”
“I DO NOT FULLY RECHARGE,” a deep voice responded, and Andromeda shrieked. She hadn't realized that the giant city could hear her! “I CAN SHUT DOWN PARTS OF MY CEREBRAL UNIT IN ORDER TO REST. ENERGON IS FED INTO A HATCH THAT LEADS TO MY HOLDING TANKS.”
Intrigued, the femme fired as many questions as she could think of. Metroplex seemed to enjoy her interest and answered them in detail. Finally, Optimus had to interrupt. “Metroplex, I'm sorry, but we have to get going. We're planning to catch the 8:40 showing at the drive-in at the South End.”
“UNDERSTOOD. HAVE FUN.”
“We will, Metroplex! Thanks for talking to me.”
“ANYTIME.”
Optimus guided the femme out the nearest exit and headed to the South End drive-in, created for Transformers and humans alike to spend their off-duty hours. They were surprised to find that a horror movie was playing. “Not my first choice by a long shot,” Optimus sighed, “but I'm willing to give it a try.”
“I've never seen a human horror movie.”
“Believe me, you're not missing anything.”
The two seated themselves on the grass and waited for the film to begin. Andromeda took the opportunity to study the clusters of humans that she saw. “What are they doing?” she whispered.
“They are consuming sustenance, called food,” Optimus explained. “Their sustenance comes in many forms and has different tastes. Did you know that some human scientists are working on creating flavored Energon? Personally, I don't see the point, but maybe we're missing out on something.”
“Who knows?” the femme shrugged. “I'm open to new experiences.”
“As am I,” he replied, looking at her meaningfully. She felt a happy flush fill her being. She could scarcely believe that she was here, by his side. She was afraid that she'd wake to find that it was all just a beautiful dream.
Andromeda glanced around, feeling the stares of dozens of optics on her. “What is everyone staring at?” she wondered. “Do I look funny?”
“You look wonderful,” Optimus reassured her, and once again she felt the rush of warmth. “They're staring at me, I'm afraid. Because I've got such a high-ranking position, people are always curious about my private life.” He sighed. “I don't have very much free time as it is. I've tried my best to keep my private life just that way: private.” A guilty tone entered his voice. “Look, I'm sorry I dragged you into this. The staring takes some getting used to. As long as you're with me, you'll be stared at too.”
“That's all right,” she soothed. “It's a small price to pay to be with you.”
Optimus turned to her in surprise. It was his turn to feel the flush of happiness. He was just so afraid he'd say or do something wrong and she'd vanish into the night. “I'm going to get some Energon treats. Be right back.”
She smiled at his retreating back, admiring his strong form. He was taller than most Transformers, and walked with a sense of purpose. He had a unique combination of power and gentleness that drew her like a moth to a flame.
In a few minutes, he was back with a bucket of tiny Energon squares. As he sat down, the large screen flickered to life, and the assembled crowd turned their attention to the movie. It was even worse than Optimus had expected. Lots of human gore and screaming. Halfway through the film he whispered, “Is this too much for you?”
“No,” his date whispered back. “It doesn't bother me, since it looks fake. I'm learning a lot about human anatomy, actually. Say, what are those two doing?”
Optimus turned his attention back to the screen and snickered. “That is how humans reproduce, Andromeda. They go through a mating ritual.”
“Ohh,” she breathed in understanding. He tried not to laugh out loud.
“That sort of thing is always included in these horror movies. I've never been able to figure out why.” He tried not to look at the screen. There were a lot of similarities between the way humans and Transformers “did the deed”, whether it was through Quintesson design or through Vector Sigma's and Primus's own plans, and it embarrassed him to witness such a scene with his new girlfriend. Uncomfortable, he thrust his hand into the Energon treat bucket and grasped something metal. It was her hand. Oops.
Andromeda gave him a shy smile as he looked at her in embarrassment. She took his hand in her own, squeezing it lightly. She returned her attention to the film, not seeing the way he gaped at her.
'She—she doesn't mind! I think she likes it!' he thought wildly. He hastily looked at the screen, afraid she'd catch him gawking at her. Her fingertips caressed his hand, sending small tingles up his arm. Suddenly the movie was the last thing from his mind.
He'd had no idea how he'd made it through the rest of the movie. He had no memory of it, not that he really cared – all he could focus on was that small, warm hand encased in his own. He hated it when anyone touched him that he didn't know well, but this… this was different….
All too soon, the movie was over. Optimus had half-hoped that they could sit here forever. But of course, that was not to be, so he reluctantly stood and pulled Andromeda to her feet. “That was… an odd movie,” she observed.
“It was quite odd, wasn't it?” he replied. He let go of her hand reluctantly when he realized they had once again become a spectacle.
“I don't much care!” she laughed, and Optimus soaked up the sound. Her laughter was like music to him. “I was with you, and that's all that matters.”
Optimus reflected on that statement as they headed back to his shuttle. Could it be true? Did it really not matter what they did, as long as they were together? He'd thought the movie was simply awful, but just having her by his side made him want to watch it ten more times.
All too soon, they were airborne, heading back for Cybertron. Prime felt a sudden pang as he realized the date was almost over. He hadn't enjoyed himself this much in so long, and he wanted it to never end. But there was something he still had to do….
Placing the ship on autopilot, he swiveled his seat to face her. “Andromeda.”
His somber tone pricked at her happy mood. “Yes, Optimus?” she replied, turning to face him.
“There's… some things I have to tell you. They aren't pleasant, but they have to be said.”
“I'm listening.” The femme leaned forward, giving him her undivided attention.
'Here goes….' “As the Autobot leader, it's my job to set an example for others. I've always tried to set a good example, but it hasn't always been easy. Sometimes I've had to refrain from doing things that I'd like for that very reason.” He shifted uncomfortably. “This is going to sound harsh – I don't mean it that way – but….” He sighed, looking at his hands. “If we're going to have a relationship together, it has to be discreet. No public displays of affection. I won't be able to acknowledge my feelings for you in front of others. I'm sorry, but I can't show preferential treatment for anyone I care about. My people will lose faith in me. When others are around, we have to remain on formal terms.” He looked down at the shuttle floor, shoulders hunched, as if expecting a rebuke.
“I understand.”
“What?” He wasn't sure he had heard properly.
She smiled at him gently, reaching out to take his hand. “I understand, Optimus. I know you're under a lot of pressure to set a good example, and I don't want to interfere with that. I know that you're of a much higher rank than me, and I'd never want anyone to think that you're biased on my behalf. I also understand how precious your personal life is, and I respect that. I would never ask you to change. I like you just the way you are. It's a shame that everyone can't know how happy we are, but I would never want to affect your image. To the rest of the world, we'll only be good friends.”
“Thank Primus,” he whispered, still unable to look at her. “You're one in a million.” He sighed heavily. “There's another matter….”
“Yes?” she prodded gently. Poor Optimus. He could never just relax and enjoy himself. He had to think twice about everything he did.
“By being with me, you are putting yourself in great danger. My enemies will become your enemies too, and a lot of them are very dangerous. They will not hesitate to use you against me. You could be hurt, or worse,” he winced at the thought, “just to cause me pain. If that happened, I could never forgive myself.”
She knew, without being told, that Alita had been the bait for several traps laid out for Optimus Prime. But he had gone to save her, all the same, knowing the risks. “I don't mind. Being with you is worth the risk.”
He had been wrong. She was one in a billion. And he knew that nothing could keep them apart.