The Borg Grail: Voyager The Return, page 5

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Voyager: The Return, page 5

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Saturday Night: Fancy Dress, Cabaret and Party!

I headed off to do a bit of shopping. My pre-con preparations had not been quite completed... For the black and white/Captain Proton party on Sunday I'd brought a black vinyl dress. But I needed to buy tights and a wig to match. No problem about the wig... but tights turned out to be much harder! In the end I settled for a plain black pair, rather than the fishnets I'd wanted, and headed back to the hotel for tea. Then I needed to get dressed for the night. I'd cobbled together something vaguely Marquis (well, the Marquis look is pretty vague...). A suede waistcoat which I wore with the shiny inside outwards, a T-shirt that I'd dyed to shades of brown and maroon, brown moleskin effect trousers and brown boots. The latter had been a last minute find at Oxfam on Thursday, though I'd ended up cutting the inside seams so I could get into them. I have large calf muscles (well, that's my excuse anyway...) I also had a tricorder. I'd wanted to get a phaser... but I decided if anyone asked, it was a phaser disguised as a tricorder. I finished off by doing Trill spots, though they weren't my best attempt.

Bill Clinton?

Finally I headed back to the Norbreck. I got NO funny looks at all on the tram at all (Blackpool on a Saturday is full of people in fancy dress, which is why I had no trouble finding a wig...) At the Norbreck the contest was just getting started, and I found myself totally outclassed. The 40 or so entries to the competition were only the start of it! There were a few good costumes at Heathrow, but nothing like this. I found myself a seat at a table. It turned out to be quite a good place as after the entries had had their turn, they sat down nearby. The far side of my table was soon filled with Chaotica's, Brides and Borg.

There was a gap while the contest was judged, filled by entertainment by some of the guests. First up was Chase, singing 'Latinum is a Girl's Best Friend'. Before the con there had been some discussion on the Wolf message board of rumours of Chase being a guest. Finally Wolf had said all the guests were from Voyager, and Chase had been announced at the Star Quest event (which I've been referring to as the dealers room...) At the time I'd posted that I bet she'd find a way to get on to the main stage, and it seems I was right! Anyway, she has a good voice. Next was Bob Picardo. He sang one of his own parodies, to a rapturous response. His response was 'Thank you. You're a great audience. You have a very low entertainment threshold'. He then went on to do Sonny and Cher 'I've Got You Babe'. Singing both parts... It got to be really funny at the end where he had to keep doing quick switches between Sonny kneeling and Cher standing up.

Chaotica and Constance put on a show

Then Tim Russ came on, with guitar, and it was time for my jaw to drop. He sang two songs, and has the most amazing voice! I was also totally spellbound by one of the songs, which seemed to be about the women in his life. Though I was rather puzzled by one particular bit of it... what on earth was the 'cushion gazer' bit about? (Yes... I know now!) I think as soon as the performance ended, I headed out to the walkway under the balcony where Mike Russ was selling the CD's. They had had 'Basic Bob', but they'd sold out. So I started looking at Tim's CD's trying to find which one had that song. I couldn't find it, and finally asked Mike who said 'There it is' and pointed at one of the albums, called 'Kushangaza'! 'Oh, I was looking for something else!' I said. It would have been bad enough if it had just been a song, but the whole album was called after it! Talk about making a prat of yourself! Mike didn't say anything though. Anyway, I asked what it meant, and it turns out it means 'amazing'. I will never forget my one word of Swahili!

Later on in the weekend I had a very funny conversation about it with someone who told me they preferred to remain anonymous (more sense than me probably...). They suggested that 'Cushion Gazer' could be a song about someone who was taken around department stores by their mother as a child, and now whenever they enter a soft furnishings department they are reminded of her. I'm sort of tempted to write it... but I don't know if I dare! As for the rest of the album... I was initially disappointed with it. It's nearly all cover versions. But it's growing on me, as Tim does have a top-rank voice. If he could only team up with a top-rank writer so he doesn't have to depend on covers to back up his own songs...

Anyway, the judging was over... I know a few people had a few gripes about the winners. 3rd place went to a pair of Scully and Skinner look-a-likes. Some people felt that they were just lucky to look like the characters, and hadn't done much in the way of costume... but on the other hand, every detail was right, down to clothing cut and their FBI badges. Subtle details can take more work and thought than the obvious alien costumes. There was no argument about the terrific group of Borg who got second, but again first was not universally popular. Some people felt the competition at a Star Trek convention shouldn't have been won by a Star Wars costume - Boba Fett. But it was an absolutely flawless costume, which could have been used on film. I guess the various Chaotica's and their Brides, robots etc were not happy, but I suppose they lost out on originality. There were rather a lot of them....

I'd actually brought my autograph stuff with me, since I'd hoped to get into the evening session to get Tim's. But that was over by the time I got there. So now I decided to head back to the hotel to drop off my bag. I also decided to leave the camera there; I thought it would be nice to have the evening without it for some strange reason!

Back at the Norbreck: the party was much larger than that on Friday. It seemed I'd missed the evening's performance of 'Star Trekkin', which was a shame. Apparently they had hundreds of people joining in! But I danced to a few others while Lolita led from the stage. I wasn't really much in the mood for dancing though, so I just wandered around a bit. One nice moment was when I was walking up the walkway under the balcony, deep in thought, and I heard someone say hello. I turned round and it was Chase and Lolita! I was pretty chuffed about that, even though they didn't stop to chat. I also said hello to Vaughn Armstrong, and he said he was looking for a bunny girl, so I asked if it was any bunny girl in particular or would any one do!


Chase, Bob and Tim entertain

Later on I ended up at the bar at the back of the hall, where several of the guests (including Rob LaBelle, and Brent Strait) were hanging out. Vaughn was there, so I asked if he'd found his bunny girl. Apparently he had: she was someone else's girlfriend. I ended up chatting to Vaughn for about half an hour. Sorry, mostly just small talk about the convention, so if you are hoping for juicy gossip, hard luck! But I did get a couple of things I can tell you: Apparently he's known Kate Mulgrew and Robert Beltran for years, considers them both friends and think they are wonderful people. And Robert's a great baseball player, a very good pitcher!



Above: Keegan, Alice and Bryan give out prizes. Right: Troi was green with envy at the attention Jean Luc was getting...

I also chatted to quite a few fans. There was speculation that Patrick Stewart was around. There was even a story that he had been spotted on Friday night. But I think that was most likely that very impressive look-a-like. The inclusion of Jackie on the guest list did seem a bit strange I had to admit. I had a drink to relax, but the party was a lot bigger than the one on Friday, and, to be honest, I was finding it a bit impersonal. So I left to catch the last tram back down the coast at just before 1 pm. I did have one last moment before the tram arrived though... The woman next to me said 'I have to ask... do the spots go all the way down?' I said no, then inspiration struck, and I added 'But you can lick them as far as they go!'. Glad to say everyone took it as the joke it was, and everybody cracked up! It's great when that happens!

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