The Borg Grail: Voyager The Return, page 8

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Voyager: The Return, page 8

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Bob and Robbie

Next up were Bob and Robbie, though, as they pointed out, they had a hard act to follow!

Anyway, my notes of the first section are a total mess, as they fired off a series of funny stories while I was trying to take pictures as well! But Bob talked about wanting to buy Robbie a razor (he had stubble, but I think it may have been for more than that!). He also talked about doing Sonny and Cher and his feminine side ('Where's Ethan?'). And they talked about how Ethan had been fascinated by the place name 'Ramsbottom'.

The first question was, I think, about the fantasy scene in which Janeway etc fight over the Doctor, and about ethics. Robbie made a comment about Bob also directing, Bob said 'I'm positive, I'm buying you a razor', and went on to say he didn't like the way actors presume… I really am going to have to improve my handwriting! I can't always make sense of my own notes! I think mention was also made of how the Fox show 'Temptation Island' was not exactly ethical in Bob's opinion…

Q: For Robbie about Blood Fever…

R: Andy Robinson directed it - he was a real pleasure to work with. He got them to rehearse all the scenes, tried different ways of doing things. So he got to kiss Roxann over and over... He didn't like the scene where B'Elanna was like 'I need it now' and Tom was 'Oh no, I couldn't possibly'. He thought it made the character look wimpy. But they explained to him that you had to think that it was the equivalent of a scene with a woman who was drugged... They have to be careful.

B: Unless you are on Fox, on Temptation Island…

Q: On doing a sketch on the Jay Leno show…

B: They did a sketch on magazines in the Dr's office, which in this case happened to be the Voyager Dr's office. My, what small feet he had. Fair sized guy, very small feet. (Begins to speculate) Maybe he has normal sized feet, which he crams into small shoes. Maybe that's why he talks quickly.

Q: If you were on 'Stars in Their Eyes' what musician would you be?

B: Do we have to be good?

R: No, you lip synch!

I think they both said Sonny and Cher!

R: I'd be Sonny.

B: I have to wear a wig to be Sonny or Cher. (Thinks) Little Richard.

R: Elvis. Ray Orbison.

B: Wear shades and sing high... Dusty Springfield is really great. He wouldn't do an impression, since he had forgotten his leopard thong. He bought the thong in Ramsbottom.

R: Isn't he a funny man! (Says something that implies that he only pretends to laugh at his jokes) We ignore each other socially. (I think he was joking…)

Q: To Robbie, about impressions…

B: He does one of Garret doing Kate.

Robbie did an impression of Garret's walk, which was greatly appreciated by the audience.

B: (I'm not sure if this part was Bob impersonating Ethan, or impersonating Kate impersonating Ethan!) I do all of Ethan's jokes. He's told them 7 or 8 times. 'It was so cold, I paid a hooker $50 to blow on my hands. I contracted a disease, but I left it untreated so I could enjoy the burning sensation...'

Bob then mentioned that he had heard about the hair auction.... John (Ethan) Philips is really his father. He was 17. In Blackpool for the summer...

Q: If you could be a Voyager character, who would you be?

I think it was actually Robbie who said Bob would be 7 of 9!

R: I would be the Doctor. He complements everyone (e.g. works well with all the other characters). He has a wonderful search for humanity. And he's very funny.

B: He's just paying me back for mentioning 2 shows he directed as favourites. The hardest role was Tim's. The episodes where he went off the deep end showed Tim's great range. Tim was an unsung hero. Tuvok projects dignity, and that has to come from within. (Ironic) And Tim has none.... I'd never say it to him, but I admire him.

Q: Any stories, from behind the scenes?

(Silence)

R: Anything come to mind?

B: We changed. Early on, we were on best behaviour. We were scared to slow production. By the second season...

R: Alan Cracker (?) got mad at me and Robert...

B: The Briefing Room and The Bridge were the two main sets we messed about in.

R: Robert Beltran was supposed to drink coffee, but it was disgusting. So the whole point became never to drink the coffee. He kept interrupting it. He'd pretend he got distracted, or forgot his line…

B: Then you picked it up... Robbie spilled coffee all over the camera! Acting like children!

R: It didn't happen often.

B: We wouldn't be in show business if it did!

Q: Is there one question you want to be asked?

R: No, that's not the question.

B: No I don't.

R: I think we've been asked every possible question.

B: They used to ask if (Patrick? Paris?) wore a g-string. They were quite disappointed when I didn't know. (thinks…) How do you get your head so shiny? Answer: the humidity in Blackpool!

R: (Not sure how they got on to this…) He was so happy the first time on the Bridge. but as Garrett said 'The real action is in Sickbay'.

At this point they were interrupted as the crowd began to cheer. It took a few moments and a fair bit of pointing before they realised the reaction was to something on the screen... an announcement that Kate had now signed up to ticket number 3500!

Bob told us that when he saw her earlier Kate had a massive blister on her palm from signing - something he has never seen before. On Friday after the opening ceremony she walked off stage saying 'Oh God! What did I say!!!'. But she kept her word in true Kate style. She signed faster and more legibly than anyone else he has seen.

Q: What 'Friends' character would you like to be?

R: Jennifer Aniston.

B: Mathew Perry. And actually look like that. And be on a Fox TV show...

R: Can you be both?

B: I can be both myself and Mathew… and save on plane tickets when I go to conventions.

Q: About being on Voyager for 7 years (I think the question was, would they have done another year?)

R: Great job.

B: I would have been happy to do another year. My wife would have made me!

The next question was about their favourite British SF series and also (I think) comparing the reaction to Voyager in Britain and in the States.

B: He's not familiar with British series, though he has met several of the actors who played Dr Who. He also mentioned Red Dwarf.

R: He's surprised how the series has taken off. It's more popular here than in the States. In Australia and Germany as well. He loves the book 'Neverwhere'. Someone gave him all the tapes from the TV series.

Q: Robbie, did you enjoy fighting Skeletor with He Man?

He did. 'Masters of the Universe' is quite popular over here. The crew was like on Trek. Courtney Cox was great (He mentioned a few other names...). It was supposed to be 8 weeks but it went way over. They got closer and closer.

Q: To Bob: You seem to be in a lot of Joe Dante films. Are you and him friends?

Yes, very good friends. He saw him in a play, which led to him playing Jack Lemmon's father, the werewolf. He doesn't know how Joe saw him playing that role!

His favourite was the cowboy in 'Innerspace'. It's always fun working with Dante. He lets him pitch (story ideas). Asks him where he wants the camera. And he talks like a mosquito.

Q: What is your favourite question? For Robbie.

Robbie starts laughing.

R: I hate all the questions! Help me Bob! I can't think...

Q: Do you think Kate should get a world record for signing autographs today?

R: She's amazing, generous, she keeps her word.

B: Now you understand why she can't do too many conventions. She's done it before, and been spent for days. Of course we're glib and insincere. We make all the usual promises, but try and catch us!

The next person to the mike declared that they liked men with shiny bald heads.

R: You seem shocked.

Bob told a story about how on Friday he hit the back of his head on some circular stairs. Which was why they made carpets… I think Robbie pointed out that they made carpets in Ramsbottom..

Q: I lived for 20 years in Ramsbottom...

B: We're making fun of Ethan Phillips really not Ramsbottom.

The questioner asked a question that led onto their version of the 'Waking Moments' story: it was stuffed sock, and according to Robbie it reached Tim's ankles.

B: We wouldn't have needed a prop...

Q: Any similar pranks?

R: PG 13 at best.

B: We were really pretty clean. There's the mind meld story from series 1...

R: And the mess hall Pon Farr scene... (Robbie went on to tell the story. He didn't really add anything to Tim's version, except that Tim threw Ethan over a table or something…)

B: We don't normally tell stories about sodomy. But you seem to be that sort of crowd, and it's in good fun. It was simulated...

R: Who shall we trash now?

Q: If you had a holodeck, what programs would you play?

R: Go ahead Bob...

B: My weekend with Claudia Schiffer...

B: We have time for one more question.

Q: What do you think of Star Trek fans? And what is your favourite TV show?

R: Great. Any group of people who do so much for charity, spend so much time, should be congratulated. You do amazing things.

His favourite TV show is 'Sponge Bob'.

B: 'Malcolm in the Middle'. I think he said Robbie got a walk-on part.

Bob talked about how when Patrick walked on stage, he felt like the biggest trek fan. He was thrilled to see the audience thrilled. Delighted to have seen it in his own peripheral way.

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