dead or alive...
Tongue On The Loose
by Glyn Brown
Pete Burns
has always been good
copy for anyone who
can get a few words out of him- and, in the past, that hasn't been too difficult.
He's been quoted
and misquoted
more often than
Mae West,
and that's where
the trouble lies.
Perhaps a mite too free in the past with throwaway lines and witty comments that get taken the wrong way, he has now
filed down the famous barbed tongue
quite considerably.
I broached the touchy
subject of Pete's public image
and his recent run-ins with the Press, and waited for the bullets to fly.
They didn't.
"It really started earlier this year, with
'That's The Way (I Like It)',"
explains Pete. "When it became a hit, suddenly the daily papers were flocking around, wanting their bits of pop star scandal.
If you don't co-operate, they go through anything they can find and piece together articles. That's what I was annoyed about.
"It's the same with the
bisexual aspect-
it's just tacky publicity,
isn't it?
I really don't think
anybody wants to know.
If I had my way I wouldn't talk to the Press, because I really don't think I've got anything valid to say."
You don't seem like
someone with nothing
to say, Pete.
"Well, yes,
I do talk very openly to people,
and I say whatever comes
to mind at the time-
I'm very flippant.
then, when things appear in
black and white,
and people are delving for exclusives, it all looks pretty yuccky.
"Whatever I've been into-
sexually, drugwise, or whatever-
I've never intended
to use it as a
promotion vehicle.
I never wanted it
to be anyone's business
but my own,
but people ask you
and before you know it,
there it is on the page."
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Tattoo Blues
It's Pete's appearance that draws the most comment, though. Even now, after a day of slog in the studio working on the forthcoming album, he's immaculately made up and dressed to kill.
"Why do I dress like this? Why does Picasso paint pictures? There's an arty quote for you.
"It's the same reason- you feel a natural inclination towards some art forms, and mine for years now has been my appearance.
"You've got to live, say, 70 years in your body and it can be a very boring place to be. There is a person inside, and you should just be able to express it. It's just that my ideas are quite spectacular- I've got tattoos and a pierced nose and..."
Will there come a day when there's not a spare inch of Pete Burns' body left to decorate?
Much laughter.
"Definitely not. When I got the tattoo, it was absolute agony. I like it now, but I'd never get another one. I'd never mutilate myself ridiculously."
Phew, that's a relief, Pete. What is the tattoo?
"Oh, it's a rose with daggers through it, a Japanese design, really lovely- if it was a picture, I'd have brought it. I'd show you, but it's in an awkward place."
Thanks for the offer. Will you consider having the tattoo removed if you get bored with that too?
No, it's there for life. I don't go back. But I could go forward, and I expect to change drastically in the years to come. I love the idea of having plastic surgery- I don't see any need to stay the way you are, and I've got no intention of doing it. I'll probably end up a real casualty!
"But at least I'm expressing myself. A lot of people want to, but they feel too inhibited about it. They worry unnecessarily that they don't (Do I imagine a slight snarl here?) fit into society. But nobody's criticism should effect anybody- if it affected me, I'd never have got started!"
Style Counselling
What would you say to someone who got kicked out of their job because of a certain style of dress?
"I'd tell 'em to go elsewhere. If all that matters is your clothes, the job's not worth having in the first place."
Doesn't your appearance make nipping up the road for a Twix and a bag of crisps difficult because it causes such a stir?
"It used to be great years ago, when nobody knew me. People wouldn't sit near me on trains, and I used to get the whole seat to myself. On some days, though, you do feel a bit sensitive and you don't want to be gawked at. I never go out in the evening, now. I don't want to be the center of attention. It's no good saying (assumes upper-class drawl) "Oh, darling, I can't stand it, everybody's looking at me." If you don't like it, you shouldn't be there in the first place."
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Canned Beauty
What have you enjoyed doing this year, then?
"Oh, the trip to America was great."
What was the best bit?
"The shops!! I can shop till I drop, you know. It's my disease, I have a spending problem- I mean, I have no problem spending.
And Joan Collins. I haven't met her, but as far as I'm concerned, she's a modern day genious.
"She hasn't had anything done, either. I know her makeup artist. When he met her, he checked up for scars, tucks, and bumps and looked to see if she had her belly button on her neck, and she didn't. She's like the portrait of Dorian Gray.
"I read her biography, Past Imperfect, where she keeps going on about these really great eye drops, so what's the first thing we do when we hit America? CHEMISTS'! EYE DROPS!
"I'm a real consumer. New York's shops are brilliant, they cater for barn pots, you can buy the most absurd things. It was one big treat."
What was the best thing you bought?
"Eye drops, followed by tins of 1950s hairspray with pictures of women with white powdered beehives on the front. Natural Beauty the spray was called. It said, 'For the Natural Look That Lasts'.
We bought cans and cans."
And is it effective?
"No, it doesn't work at all! We've just got the cans displayed in the bathroom."
Face Lifts
Dead Or Alive's remake of, "You Spin Me Round", is a thumping good slice of electro-funk with a dance beat to get you on your feet.
Hopes for it are running high.
Will some of Pete's outrageousness surface in the video?
"Definitely. It'll be quite extravagant, with gold and slaves and stuff.
It's got a sense of humor."
"I'm seriously looing into facelifts," offers Pete after a few thoughtful seconds.
"I'm not going to grow old gracefully."
What about silently and mysteriously?
The brown eyes widen above a mouth as big as the Mersey and look at me for a bit to get my mood.
"Yes, possibly. I don't talk very much."
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