Nick is a brooding soul. Almost from his earliest years, he knew he was different...that he was marked somehow. He didn't know how, but that difference kept him away from people. It prevented him from making strong ties with anyone. He was a loner, almost from the get go.

After a while, the difference presented itself: he could see deeply into things...into people. Reality suddenly shifted on it's axis for him, and he was driven to the point of madness with the visions he saw. Not only that, but at this time he was also diagnosed as a manic/depressive. He spent some time in insane aslyums, trying to get his head straightened out.

His only redeeming feature in his eyes is that he is a musical prodigy, with the ability to coax the sweetest tune out of thin air. He channeled all of his loneliness and morbidity into this avenue, creating some strange and haunting melodies. It eased his mind somewhat, and he was able to function...with the help of some artificial stimulants to dull the sensations he'd receive.

Nick has yet to make strong ties to Amber. His father there isn't talked about anymore, rarely at best. He doesn't mention it, if at all possible. Unfortunately, the resemblances both physical and mental are unmistakable, and it's marked him again. It's all but condemned him to being a loner yet again, to not fitting in.

Still, he tries to be the best person he can be, though holding a positive attitude is nearly impossible for the man. All he wants is people to judge him on his own merits, and not on his heritage.

Nick is of average height, being around 5'10 or so, and very lean, almost gaunt. He's physically fit, but not excessively so. He almost always has dark circles under his eyes, as if he hasn't slept in a very long time. He has very dark reddish brown hair, which he normally keeps somewhat trimmed and short. He usually sports a moustache, and most times has a full beard which is kept very short...oftentimes it ends up looking like scruff more than anything else. His eyes are pale blue in color. His hands have a few calluses on them, and the fingers are long and almost delicate looking.

He dresses in stylish clothing, mostly dark. Although he has chosen 'his' colors, he'll dress in whatever colors he feels like at the time...however, most of his wardrobe is black. He feels most comfortable in suits, complete with necktie and all, but he will accede to Amber's dress code. When in Amber, he normally wears a burgandy or hunter's green dress shirt, looking more like a 'poet's' shirt than anything else, black breeches, and black knee high boots. He has been known to go the Martin route every now and again, and wear 'punk' style clothing consisting mainly in tight black leather and silver studs, but those instances are few and far between.

Nick has not chosen for himself a personal symbol. He has chosen 'his' colors, and they are burgandy, forest or hunter's green, and black.

Nick was raised in a Shadow called Mordeth. The Shadow has modern 'Earth' type conveniences, but is much, much darker than Shadow Earth. It has a gothic/punk atmosphere, and most of the residents of the Shadow are rather stuck in the Victorian Age. There is either high society, or the poor working class, and hardly any inbetweens.

Nick was born into high society. His mother, Mary Calloway, is a socialite, who happened to have a relationship with the wrong person: Brand of Amber. Nick has no idea if his parents were even married or not--he assumed they were, and that was that. He rarely saw his father during his childhood, and wasn't sure he was happy to see him when he did. Brand's mood were mercurial, and switched often. While he never hurt the boy, the constant threat loomed over the household.

After Nick turned 11, he only saw his father once more, ten years later. After that...nothing. It is fair to say they were never close. He was close to his mother for a while, but they drifted apart when Nick began having his difficulties. His mother simply couldn't understand him, and would rather not talk about it, especially after Nick was committed. He has no siblings, and has yet to make any strong connections with his Amber relations.

Nick has almost always explored every part of his thoughts, and memories, and dreams. Most of these he writes down in disjointed journals, to puzzle over later, searching for meaning in what he remembers. Anything that his player writes for this game will be posted here. Some of it will be background memories, and some of it will be game logs, most likely converted into a first-person format. Enjoy.

And for Our Musical Selection We Have...
Chapter 1: A Midnight Visit
Chapter 2: Juliana
Chapter 3: The Asylum
Chapter 4: Beloved Sister, Indifferent Aunt
Chapter 5: Life in Amber
Chapter 6: Cousins, Cousins, Everywhere...
Chapter 7: This Way Madness Lies
Chapter 8: Home Sweet Home
Chapter 9: Mother Knows Best
Chapter 10: Dinner
Chapter 11: The Power of Brand Compels You

Nick has many opinions about his family, but keeps most of them close to his vest. He doesn't talk much, but when he does, it's generally in generalizations that any fool could see for himself.

When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.

--Henny Youngman

My kittens look at me like little angels, and always after doing something especially devilish.

--Jamie Ann Hunt

Beware the fury of a patient man.

--John Dryden

Never play another person's game. Play your own.

--Andrew Salter

What would you attempt to do if you knew you could not fail?

--Dr. Robert Scheller

It's hard to work in groups when you're omnipotent.

--Q (from ST:tNG)

If all else fails, immortality can always be assured by spectacular error.

--John Kenneth Galbraith

Action is the last refuge of those who cannot dream.

--Oscar Wilde

Where I was born and where and how I have lived is unimportant. It is what I have done with where I have been that should be of interest.

--Georgia O'Keeffe

The cat could very well be man's best friend but would never stoop to admitting it.

--Doug Larson

The superflous is very necessary.

--Voltaire

Only the shallow know themselves.

--Oscar Wilde

There are two types of people--those who come into a room and say, "Well, here I am!" and those who come in and say, "Ah, there you are."

--Frederick L. Collins

History will be kind to me for I intend to write it.

--Winston Churchill

Men stumble over the truth from time to time, but most pick themselves up and hurry off as if nothing happened.

--Winston Churchill

Pick battles big enough to matter, small enough to win.

--Jonathan Kozol

When we think we lead we most are led.

--Byron

Criticism is prejudice made plausible.

--H. L. Mencken

I do not want people to be agreeable, as it saves me the trouble of liking them.

--Jane Austen

He that respects himself is safe from others; he wears a coat of mail that none can pierce.

--Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

One of the best ways to measure people is to watch the way they behave when something free is offered.

--Ann Landers

In the Norse mythology, Loki originally was on the side of the rest of the gods, helping them once or twice using a particularly nasty form of trickery. He was a cunning negotiator with a talent for technicalities. He was sort of the Norse equivalent of a lawyer, no doubt the reason they tied him down in a pit dripping acidic venom on him.

--Martin Terman

I am not in this world to live up to other people's expectations, nor do I feel that the world must live up to mine.

--Fritz Perls

Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.

--Mark Twain

The more I see, the more I see there is to see.

--John Sebastian

Never let your sense of morals get in the way of doing what's right.

--Isaac Asimov

Diplomacy---the art of saying "Nice doggie" 'til you can find a stick.

--Wynn Catlin

She got her looks from her father. He's a plastic surgeon.

--Groucho Marx

People will forget what you did, people will forget what you said, but they won't forget the way you made them feel.

--Anonymous

Oh, that way madness lies; let me shun that.

--William Shakespeare, "King Lear", Act 3 scene 4

The worst sin toward our fellow creatures is not to hate them, but to be indifferent to them: that's the essence of inhumanity.

--George Bernard Shaw

There is not enough darkness in all the world to put out the light of even one small candle.

--Robert Alden

You must act in your friend's interest whether it pleases him or not; the object of love is to serve, not to win.

--Woodrow Wilson

have hit this page since September 26, 2000.

The original character concept "Nick Calloway" was made for the If the World Did Not Exist Amber Diceless Roleplaying PbEM. The concept of "Amber" is copyright © Roger Zelazny, and the game is copyright © Phage Press. No copyright infringes of the game are intended. This game is now defunct, and this page will no longer be updated. This page was last updated on January 6, 2004.

Images of Gary Oldman were courtesy of:

The Dark Side of Gary Oldman
The Gary Oldman Page
Kali's Gary Oldman Page

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