Well shoot, would you look at that? It's been almost a freakin' year since I last wrote one of these. That's a long time. Should be all kinda sh... stuff to go off on now. Well well... So, what if, say, theoreticly (I shouldn't try to use big words), you broke up with this really cool girl, just because she was too far away? And what if you were still really attracted to her, and felt... jealous anytime she did something with someone else, but instead of showing how you felt, you were a jerk to her every time you talked to her on the computer... What if it made her cry? Would you stop? Or would you tell her to stop crying? Or ignore it? Would you ignore it and keep making things worse? Would you tell her about the other girl or girls you were attracted to? About how you were spending so much time with them and it was so great? Ahhhh!!! ::shiver:: OK, I'm OK. Dude, what if a girl you had gone out with and broken up with over two years ago was still on your mind? What if... I stoped saying "what if" and just told the story straight for once. Everyone knows it's just what actually happens to me, all and all. Anyway, so this girl (the one who's father tried to kill me almost a year and a half ago) has taken over my mind. This is disturbing to me, seeing as she hasn't even talked to me since... mid-May, 1999. OK, yeah, our relationship was a big thing in my life, but come on, get over it, right? I've met probably the perfect girl since then, but broken it off because of the distance (among other faults of mine)... And yet I still cannot shake the infamous one. Now, you think "OK, girl hasn't talked to you for more than a year, her father hates you, you found another great, probably even better, girl, so why the hell are you still stuck on the one who won't even talk to you?" Good question. One I have asked myself many times. God knows the girl I hang out with all the time now doesn't want to here that name anymore, much less the ex who hangs out with me... Someone asked me tonight if I was obsessed. I told her I didn't think so. But then, maybe I don't know what obsession is... I mean, it's not like I think about her all the time, like I did about a month ago... heh... Oh yeah, so I think part of the reason I've been thinking about her more again recently is that I learned she will be going away to college. Now, you would think, "Well, that's good, she'll be away from her dad, and then he won't be keeping her from talking to you." (if you knew that was a reason I've thought of for her not talking to me...) But no. One of my first thoughts was "Wait, I won't know how to get a hold of her, and she might not be able to get a hold of me if she wants to. And maybe she'd know how to, and want to, but think I didn't want to..." So, I have to do something about it, right? Well, I end up deciding to call her house...

So, you know, I hate the way your boss, who works at another store, is not at all helpful when the AC is broken. "OK, look man, the animals are dying in our freakin' oven of a pet store..."

(8-14 1:32)

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