The following is an effort by David Tomita and Don Bertino to document the attractions at Disneyland - the Original (tm).
Check out other attaction scripts at ftp.netcom.com/pub/be/bertino and at The Bertino Disney Archives.
Any comments/additions/corrections would be welcomed.
(As we pass the Star Speeder and go into the next room, we see two droids, a G219 droid working on an older droid, and a G214 droid working the ticket/customs desk. All pagings are heard at the same time.) G219: "These shutdown breaks are getting much too short. Now, what have we have here? Hmm, Hey, haven't I seen you before, seems like I am always fixing this burnout. Oh, let's see now, no, no, that can't be right. Hmm...." G219: "Hey, you there, ah excuse me? Hello? I am talking to you! Yes, you! Are you very mechanical? Well, I was just wondering if you could tell me where this goes? See I wasn't really online when they where programing us for logic repair, usually I can figure it out but these old ACK 5 are kinda built backwards, you know what I mean? Hmm? No, you...don't...know...what...I...mean.... Well, don't worry, this isn't your navigator, No, I fixed him hours ago but thanks for trying to helping me out and, you have a nice day. I'll figure this out,....... eventually." Female supervisor: "Attention please, attention please, there has been a disruption in the labor output of droids, sector 2, all work is to resume immediately, or power disconnect with be initiated." G219: "Oh oh, I better get back to work. Oh, try to keep the moving folks, I am not programmed for dispatch. You know, it's not polite to stare." G219: "Now, was I suppose to weld that logic module positive to positive or negative to negative? No, no I'm positive it was negative to positive, absolutely positive." G219: "Hey, what are you all staring at? Ohh, me! You got cameras, why don't you guys take a picture, it will last longer. Geesh, alot of families here today. Glad your flying with us. You know, I like families. Sure, I see alot of mine these days. Oh look, there's Gus. Hi, Dad! Dad was the top Star Tours pilot. Kinda took a crash course in StarSpeeders.... If you know what I mean. Now he is a really basket case. Yeap, that's him all over. It's a shame too, really gone to pieces. Hey, are you all together today? Are you sure? Ok, you have your orders then." (???Not sure about this???) Female supervisor: "Attention please, attention please, we are experiencing unusual behavior in the G2 droids in sector 2. Maintenance units begin surveillance of all sector 2, G2 droids." G219: "I'm listening to KDROID, my favorite station. This is the latest hit song, Danny and the Droids, it's called, 'I want to weld your hand'. I love those robot-toe intro's. Hey man, care to bogy? You might peddle up your motions, your units are looking real hydraulic." G219: (Singing) "'I've been working on the same droid, all my live long day.' hehehe, stick'em up. I love the west. It reminds me of my last home on Tatooine. Hey, speaking of homes, how about taking me with you when you leave, will you wait for me? I get off work in a few years. Pllleeeaassee?" Female supervisor: "Monitor circuits continue detect a decrease in production activities in droids sector 2. Shutdown procedures will begin in 60 seconds, unless output increases immediately." G219: "You see, know your getting me in trouble. That's what happen's when you talk to humanoid. Always trouble. I'm sorry, but I have to get back to work." G219: "Hello, how are you? I'm, ah, G219, fixit-bee labor droid, see my job is to fix the pilots and navigators for Star Tours. It's a really neat job, I mean, I like it and you get to meet alot of really nice droids and,.... excuse me, excuse me? you look awfully familiar, wasn't I in your service? a long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away? Oh, I guess not. You only have one head. Hey, that's a very nice droid your traveling with, but if you ever like to trade that one in for a newer unit? Let me know. Come by and see me anytime. I'm always here." Female supervisor: "Malfunction in sector 2, malfunction in sector 2. All droids will be shutdown for reloading of labor program. Standby for power disconnect." G219: "Here we go again. Their going to pull the plug on me. See you later folks. It's nap tiimmmmeeeeee......" (We walk around this first droid and meet the next customs droid) G214: "These shutdown's are becoming a pain in the neck! heh, literately! ooh." Computer supervisor: Warbles G214: "Yeah, Yeah, I hear you. What? Passports? How do I know if they have their passports? Ok, ok OK! I'll check. Geesh, give me a circuit break well ya?" G214: "Hey, do all you passengers have the necessary paperwork to go on this tour? You know, passports, visas, tickets, flight insurance.... Well?" G214: "I don't know, chief heh, they're all just standing there staring at me. Maybe their not programed to my frequency." Computer supervisor: Warbles G214: "Hey! What's the matter? Haven't you people ever seen intelligent life before? heh heh heh." Female supervisor: "Attention please, attention please, there has been a disruption in the labor output of droids, sector 2, all work is to resume immediately, or power disconnect with be initiated." Computer supervisor: Warbles G214: "Hey! Get off my servos! I'm not the one who purchased all those defective RX pilots." Computer supervisor: Warbles G214: "Have any of you humanoid's flown on a StarSpeeder before? Well, I hope you enjoy your tour. Now, Now, please keep your party together as you approach the loading concourse. Heh, that is, if you ever like to see them again. If not, you can say goodbye now, heh heh heh." Female supervisor: "Attention please, attention please, we are experiencing unusual behavior in the G2 droids in sector 2. Maintenance units begin surveillance of all sector 2, G2 droids." G214: "What's this, do my senses deceive me? Or are their really passengers out there? Gee, I hope the new StarSpeeders run better then the one that brought me here. What a bucket of bolts! You'll never get me on one of those things in a billion lightyears." Computer supervisor: Warbles G214: "Yeah, Chief." Computer supervisor: Warbles G214: "What's that? Don't worry, those humanoids out there can't hear a word I am saying, as long as I have the comlink switched off." Computer supervisor: Warbles G214: "Huh, it's not!?! Oh oh. Sssay, are you the lucky people that are gonna ride the new StarSpeeder 3000? Hhhey, wait til you see it! It's a real beauty, and what a ride! Smooth as transmission fluid! You'll never forget it!..... Although you probably wish you could....." Female supervisor: "Monitor circuits continue detect a decrease in production activities in droids sector 2. Shutdown procedures will begin in 60 seconds, unless output increases immediately." G214: "Excuse me please, but you'll have to check the excess baggage. Huh? Oh I am terribly sorry, I didn't realize that was your husband. heh heh heh." Computer supervisor: Warbles G214: "Sorry, Chief. My senses where out of focus there for a second." G214: "Hi ya folks. I'm G214. I run this operation. Now if there's anything I can help you with..... Hey you over there. I'm talking to you! Could you creatures please give me your undivided attention for a moment? Thank you. As some of you have probably been wondering, you are flying with Star Tours today. Well, let me see. 1, 2, 3, 4... ah, do you want me to include you? Ok, 5, 6, ah stop back and check with me later, this could take a while. 7, 8, 9, 10..." Female supervisor: "Malfunction in sector 2, malfunction in sector 2. All droids will be shutdown for reloading of labor program. Standby for power disconnect." Computer supervisor: Warbles G214: "Well, it's break time. Wait, Wa-WAIT, I didn't mean thhaaatttt...." (We walk pass the customs droid and are assigned a line in a "StarSpeeder". While we wait for the doors to open, TV monitors show "our" starspeeder being worked on and serviced. ) Male Announcer: "Star Tours announces the arrival of the Endor Express. Once we had a chance to service the StarSpeeder, we'll begin our boarding procedures. Thank You." Female Announcer: "May I have your attention please? At this time, I'd like to take a moment to revue our boarding process with you. When the automatic doors have opened, please proceed directly across the ramp, into the cabin. Continue to move all the way across your aisle, filling in every available seat. For your safety, all passengers are required to wear safety restraints thru out the flight. To fasten the restraint, pull the strap out from the right side of the seat and snap it into the console to your left. Galactic regulations require that all carry on items be safely stowed beneath your seat. While on board, flash photography is not permitted and please, no smoking at any time. If you have any questions, feel free to ask an attendant. You'll be boarding in just a few moments. Thank you, and have a pleasant tour." Male Announcer: "Star Tours announces the boarding of the Endor Express, non-stop StarSpeeder service to the moon of Endor. All passengers, please prepare for immediate boarding."
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