The Whole Sin Catalog
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Whadaya mean, "is"?
The following is from an article on lying which explains various methods of denial:
[With added examples.]
"When confronted with their lies [or sins], people construct hedges of emotional-commotion to keep you at a distance, such as:
Strong denial. "I did not"
["I did not have sex with that woman, Miss Lewinsky."]
Blame. "He/she made me do it!"["Look at the very people who are involved in this. They have popped up in other settings. The great story here for anybody willing to find it, write about it and explain it is this vast right-wing conspiracy that has been conspiring against my husband since the day he announced for president," Mrs. Clinton said.]
Discrediting your support group so you'll keep your suspicions secret. "Your friends are such gossips." "Why do you have to tell your family our private business?" "Can I trust you to keep this between the two of us?"["In addition, I had real and serious concerns about an independent counsel investigation that began with private business dealings 20 years ago, . . ."
"The independent counsel investigation moved on to my staff and friends, then into my private life. And now the investigation itself is under investigation."
"Now, this matter is between me, the two people I love most -- my wife and our daughter -- and our God.
"But it is private, and I intend to reclaim my family life for my family. It's nobody's business but ours."]
Anger. Their anger intimidates you, so you'll back down. Your anger sidetracks you, so you'll forget the original issue. You can't think straight when you are angry or dealing with an angry person, but you may be close to the truth.
["This has gone on too long, cost too much and hurt too many innocent people. Now, this matter is between me, the two people I love most -- my wife and our daughter -- and our God. I must put it right, and I am prepared to do whatever it takes to do so. Nothing is more important to me personally. But it is private, and I intend to reclaim my family life for my family. It's nobody's business but ours."]
Arrogantly justifying their behavior. "Yeah, what of it? I can do what I want!" "I'm not accountable to you." These defiant responses shake you up and strip away your defenses so you acquiesce to their viewpoint.
["I'm not going to have some reporters pawing through our papers. We are the president." -Hillary Clinton commenting on the release of subpoenaed documents.]
Minimizing the lie by distracting you with another lie about your perception. "How could you even think that about someone you love?" Now you are diverted from the lie [or sin] and occupied with the liar's feelings of rejection, hurt and dismay that you dare to question their motives.["As you know, in a deposition in January, I was asked questions about my relationship with Monica Lewinsky. While my answers were legally accurate, I did not volunteer information. Indeed, I did have a relationship with Miss Lewinsky that was not appropriate. In fact, it was wrong."] (Emphasis ours.)
[Q. At any time were you and Monica Lewinsky alone together in the Oval Office?
A. I don't recall, . . .
Q. So I understand, your testimony is that it was possible, then, that you were alone with her, but you have no specific recollection of that ever happening?
A. Yes, that's correct . . .
Q. Have you ever met with Monica Lewinsky in the White House between the hours of midnight and six a.m.?
A. I certainly don't think so
Q. Certainly if it happened, nothing remarkable would have occurred?
A. No, nothing remarkable. I don't remember it.
Q. Did you have an extramarital sexual affair with Monica Lewinsky?
A. No.
Q. If she told someone that she had a sexual affair with you beginning in November of 1995, would that be a lie?
A. It's certainly not the truth. It would not be the truth.
Q. I think I used the term "sexual affair." And so the record is completely clear, have you ever had sexual relations with Monica Lewinsky, as that term is defined in Deposition Exhibit 1, as modified by the Court.. . .
A. I have never had sexual relations with Monica Lewinsky. I've never had an affair with her.][Q: "No improper relationship" – define what you mean by that.
A: Well, I think you know what it means. It means that there is not a sexual relationship, an improper sexual relationship, or any other kind of improper relationship.]
Distorting your ability to see truth by packaging the lie in a half-truth. "The woman in the restaurant was my secretary. We were talking business."[Q. At any time were you and Monica Lewinsky alone together in the Oval Office?
A. I don't recall, but as I said, when she worked at the legislative affairs office, they always had somebody there on the weekends. I typically worked some on the weekends. Sometimes they'd bring me things on the weekends. She – it seems to me she brought things to me once or twice on the weekends. In that case, whatever time she would be in there, drop it off, exchange a few words and go, she was there. I don't have any specific recollections of what the issues were, what was going on, but when the Congress is there, we're working all the time, and typically I would do some work on one of the days of the weekends in the afternoon.]
Accusing you of being irrational. "You're crazy...too sensitive... a nag."["This has gone on too long, cost too much and hurt too many innocent people." "It is time to stop the pursuit of personal destruction and the prying into private lives and get on with our national life."]
Arguing the lie is a one-time incident or the exception. "Everybody makes mistakes." "Give me a break. I made an error in judgment."["Indeed, I did have a relationship with Miss Lewinsky that was not appropriate. In fact, it was wrong. It constituted a critical lapse in judgment and a personal failure on my part for which I am solely and completely responsible."]
Hiding behind an honorable intention. "Yes, I was briefly involved with that guy; but when I thought about you and the kids and what we have together, I promised myself I will break it off."["I can only tell you I was motivated by many factors. First, by a desire to protect myself from the embarrassment of my own conduct. I was also very concerned about protecting my family." "Our country has been distracted by this matter for too long, and I take my responsibility for my part in all of this. That is all I can do. Now it is time -- in fact, it is past time to move on."] (Emphasis ours.)
Making it your problem if you don't instantly forgive despite a lack of remorse or change of behavior on their part. "What a goody two shoes you are!" "Why can't you just forgive me?" "And you say you're a Christian?""
["And so tonight, I ask you to turn away from the spectacle of the past seven months, to repair the fabric of our national discourse, and to return our attention to all the challenges and all the promise of the next American century."]
Article source:
"Lying - Isn't Everybody Doing It?", by Kari West
http://www.ptm.org/99PT/MayJun/Lying.htmSources of examples in brackets:
Bill Clinton's August 17 speech to the American public re: Monica Lewinsky
http://www.zpub.com/un/un-bc-sp1.html
"What Clinton Said", The Washington Post
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-srv/politics/special/clinton/stories/whatclintonsaid.htmHillary Clinton: 'This Is A Battle'
http://www.cnn.com/ALLPOLITICS/1998/01/27/hillary.today/
This segment could also be called, "Sinning -- Isn't Everybody Doing [and Denying] it?" If these methods sound familiar, it could be because they were all used to defend a recent U.S. Presidential administration. Or it could be because everyone uses them.