A. Behavioral: (1) Troubled couples exchange higher rates of negative behavior and lower rates of positive behavior (which are independent of each other). (2) Troubled couples use less effective (such as unclear and indirect) and more aversive (such as critical) communication to express their thoughts and feelings. Troubled couples use put-down humor, whereas untroubled couples usually do not. (3) Troubled couples attempt to solve relationship problems with less effective problem solving skills. They cross complain a lot, and they metacommunicate (talk about how they talk) negatively. (4) Troubled couples use more coercive methods for attempting to change the marital partner's behavior. The biggest threat is divorce because once one has made it, there is nothing left to threaten.

B. Cognitive: The couple should look at their: (1) assumptions about the marriage and nature of the spouses, (2) standards about how the marriage and the spouse should be, (3) attributions about the causes of positive and negative marital events (ask questions about what makes them argue; stable negative situations cannot be changed; strive for unstable negative or stable positive), (4) expectations about the likelihood that particular marital events will occur in the future, and (5) perceptions (notably selective attention) of the information available when observing one's interactions with one's partner.

C. Affective (emotions): The couple should look at: (1) each spouse's degree of positive and negative emotion toward the partner, (2) spouses' awareness of their emotion and cause of their emotional states, (3) degree to which spouses express their emotion and respond to their partner's emotions, and (4) forms and intensities of affect that can interfere with good marital functioning.

A. Behavioral: Look at problem content areas, excesses and deficits in exchange of pleasing and displeasing behaviors, communication skills, problem-solving skills, and behavior change skills.

B. Cognitive: Perceptions, attributions, expectations, assumptions, and standards. Use an interview.

C. Affective: Look at:

D. Basic Premise: Assessment is necessary to plan effective intervention, and assessment goes on continually throughout the marriage counseling.

A. Behavioral: Increase positive behavior (the number of pleases) between the spouses. Have love days or caring days. On communication, have expression of emotion and problem solving taught separately. All communication has three components (semantic (what is being said), syntax (how verbal punctuation is being placed), and pragmatics (what are the effects of what is being said in terms of power). The power rule is the problem in all relationships with communication problems. On conflict resolution, state problem clearly and succinctly, discuss possible solutions, decide on solution, and set a trial period. Contract for change. Quid pro quo means that I will change if you do. Good faith means that I will change on faith. Holistic means that I will choose what to change from a list.

B. Cognition: The goal is to identify and modify aspects of each spouse's cognitions (perceptions, attributions, expectations, assumptions, and standards) that produce dysfunctional emotions or behavior during marital interactions. If the cognitions are accurate, then the change will be aimed at behavioral modifications.

C. Affect (the emotional part): The steps are labeling and understanding emotions, learning how to hear and express emotions, and dealing with anger (retribution, restitution, and refuge).