| 1. | You ask the waiter what the restaurant's core competencies are. |
| 2. | You decide to re-org your family into a "team-based organization." |
| 3. | You refer to dating as test marketing. |
| 4. | You can spell "paradigm." |
| 5. | You actually know what a paradigm is. |
| 6. | You understand your airline's fare structure. |
| 7. | You write executive summaries on your love letters. |
| 8. | You think that it's actually efficient to write a ten page paper
with six other people you don't know. |
| 9. | You believe every company is "a traditional functional
organization, with promotion based on tenure, but one that needs to change as it is
facing ever increasing competition..." |
| 10. | You believe that a company's problems are never caused by an
"ineffective handling of an administrative situation." |
| 11. | You believe you never have any problems in your life, just
"issues" and "improvement opportunities". |
| 12. | You calculate your own personal cost of capital. |
| 13. | You explain to your bank manager that you prefer to think of
yourself as "highly leveraged" as opposed to "in debt." |
| 14. | You ask your bank manager if she has heard of
"Modigliani-Miller",
and then you ask her if she has a pizza so you can show her. |
| 15. | You can explain to somebody the difference between
"re-engineering", "down-sizing", "right-sizing", and "firing people". |
| 16. | You actually believe your explanation in number 15. |
| 17. | You start doing your kid's math equations in reverse Polish
notation. |
| 18. | You enjoy using an HP-12C. |
| 19. | You refer to your previous life as "my sunk cost". |
| 20. | Your three meals a day are a morning consumption function, a
noontime consumption function, and an evening consumption function. |
| 21. | You refer to your significant other as "my co-CEO." |
| 22. | Your favorite stories begin "Bob Jones, VP of marketing, sat at
his desk and stared out his window..." |
| 23. | You like both types of sandwiches: ham and turkey. |
| 24. | You believe CAPM is just as important as the Theory of
Relativity. |
| 25. | You believe CAPM. |
| 26. | You start to feel sorry for Dilbert's boss. |
| 27. | You believe the best tables and graphs take an hour to
comprehend. |
| 28. | You refer to divorce as "divestiture." |
| 29. | Your favorite artist is the one who does the dot drawings for
the Wall Street Journal. |
| 30. | None of your favorite publications have cartoons. |
| 31. | You know every single piece of clip art in PowerPoint. |
| 32. | You account for your tuition as a capital expenditure instead
of an expense. |
| 33. | You insist that you do some more market research before you and
your spouse produce another child. |
| 34. | At your last family reunion, you wanted to have an emergency
meeting about their brand equity. |
| 35. | You always call your mechanic before you start your car to see
if it will blow up given the day's weather conditions... |
| 36. | ...and expect him to use a decision tree to work it out. |
| 37. | You've decided the only way to afford a house is to call your
fellow alumni and offer to name a room after them, if they'll help with the down payment. |
| 38. | Your "deliverable" for Sunday evening is clean laundry and paid
bills |
| 39. | You use the term "value-added" without falling down laughing. |
| 40. | You ask the car salesman if the car comes with a whiteboard and
Internet connection. |
| 41. | You give constructive feedback to your dog. |
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