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A joke about engineers ...

A boy was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess." He bent over, picked up the frog, and put it into his pocket. The frog spoke up again and said, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful princess, I will stay with you for one week." The boy took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it, and returned it to his pocket.

The frog cried out, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a princess, I'll stay with you and do ANYTHING you want." Again the boy took the frog out, smiled at it, and returned it to his pocket.

Finally, the frog asked, "What is the matter? I've told you I'm a beautiful princess, that I'll stay with you for a week and do anything you want. why won't you kiss me?" The boy said, "Look, I'm an engineer. I don't have time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog is cool."

Another joke about engineers ...

An male engineering student met another male engineering student riding a new bicycle. "Hey, where did you get that new bike?"

"Well, I was walking in the park and a beautiful girl riding this bike stopped, threw the bike down on one side of the path, took off her clothes and threw them down on the other side of the path, and said 'Take anything you want!'"

The first student said "Good choice, the clothes probably wouldn't have fit you anyway!"

WARNING!

And a PG-rated joke about engineers ...

An engineer died and reported to the pearly gates, where St. Peter looked over his history and said "I'm sorry, but you have to go to hell!" So the engineer went ot hell.

In hell it was miserable. So, the engineer went to work designing air conditioning, swimming pools, etc. Before to long things were looking up down there.

But then God found out! So, God called Satan and said "There has been a mistake, the engineer shouldn't have been sent to hell, and you must return him to heaven."

Satan said "No way, Now that we have an engineer on staff we aren't about to let him go."

God returned "Listen, this is not an optional thing, you must return him immediately!"

Satan then said "Well I'm not returning him, so just what are you going to do about it?"

"I'll sue, that's what I'll do!" said God.

To which Satan simply returned "Yea, right. And just where are you going to get an attorney?"

WARNING!

And a PG13-rated joke about engineers ...

BEWARE!

Three freshman engineering students were sitting around one day arguing about who might've designed the human body. The first one said, "It must've been a mechanical engineer. The human body has all those levers and pivots and stuff - a mechanical engineer must have designed all that."

The second one said, "No, it had to have been an electrical engineer. The complex way the nerves are wired up to the brain must have been designed by an electrical engineer."

After arguing a while they turned to the third student, who had been sitting quietly, and asked what he thought. The third one then calmly said, "You're both wrong, it was a civil engineer. Who else would have run a waste water line through a recreational area?"

WARNING!

Well, O.K., here it is, an R-rated joke about engineers ...

R-RATED

BEWARE!

ADULTS ONLY!

CAUTION!

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HA HA - GOTCHA!