Jokes page: 4
Your So Fat....Light
Your so fat that when God said
'let there be
light, he made you move
Hello Stranger
I know I haven't known you
for a very long time,
and I shouldn't be asking you
for this so soon,
but I need it badly. I haven't
had it for a very
long time. I can already feel
it going in good and
hard and coming out nice and
soft. If you would
do this for me no one would
ever know. I am sure
you can satisfy my needs, and
I'd be very grateful
if you would. I am very desperate
and I need your
help. You must think by now
I have a lot of
nerve, but I can feel my tounge
wrappingaround it
and sucking out all the juice
until its very dry.
It has been on my mind all
day and I'm not going
to beat around the bush anymore.
Do you have a
piece of gum?
Viruses
to watch for:
Ellen Degeneres virus.....Your
IBM suddenly claims it's a MAC.
Monica Lewinsky virus......
Sucks all the memory out of your computer.
Titanic virus.......Makes your
whole computer go down.
Disney virus.......Everything
in the computer goes Goofy.
Mike Tyson virus.... Quits
after one byte.
Prozac virus....... Screws
up your RAM but your processor doesn't care.
Lorena Bobbit virus.... Turns
your hard disk into a 3.5 inch floppy.
Woody Allen virus.... By-passes
the motherboard and turns on a daughter card.
Joey Buttafuoco virus.... Only
attacks minor files.
Spice Girl virus....... Has
no real function, but makes a pretty desktop.
Ronald Reagan virus..... Saves
your data, but forgets where it is stored.
Dr. Kevorkian virus....Searches
your hard drive for old files and deletes them.
Oprah Winfrey virus...... Your
200MB hard drive suddenly shrinks to 80MB,
and then slowly expands to
300MB
AT&T virus...... Every
3 minutes it tells you what great service you are getting.
MCI virus..... Every 3 minutes
it reminds you that you're paying too much for the AT&T virus.
Arnold Schwarzenegger virus....
Terminates and stays resident. It'll be back.
Viagra virus.... Expands your
hard drive while putting too much pressure on your zip drive.
Then there is the Clinton PC.
Virus.... It has a six inch hard drive and no memory.:
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