November 25,1996
Dear Br. Stapleton:
We received our new telephone book recently and, while scanning the pages, I was amused to see that some wives are now listing their names after their husband’s name. I seldom let an opportunity pass of asking the “why” of human behavior and, occasionally, some interesting answers come back.
The only purpose for a telephone book is to serve as a source
for telephone numbers. This may seem obvious but I believe it
is also being used for another purpose. Traditionally, when a
telephone subscriber listed a name in the phone book, it was listed
under the husband’s name rather then the wife’s name.
This practice reflected the consensus of our society that the
man was the head of the house and, therefore, it was natural to
list his name, in preference to the name of his wife, children,
or dog.
But the times are changing. No longer is it good enough for only
the man to list his name, now his wife must have her name there
also. Of what benefit is it to a person, seeking a phone number,
to have both the husband’s and wife’s name listed? The
only situation, in which I could possibly think there may be some
benefit, to this practice of dual listings, is if the searcher
does not know the husband’s name but does know the wife’s
name. While this may happen, on occasion, I don’t think this
is the motivation that women have in mind when they insist that
their names be included, along with their husband’s name.
It is as if women are saying, “I’m here too, don’t
over look me.” The desire for self-promotion originated with
Satan and is rapidly infusing the church with his attributes,
not to mention the world, which has long since lost all interest
in reflecting Christ’s glory. Women, today, are demanding
to be heard in the church, to be ministers, to be important, to
have their influence felt and listened to.
When feminism enters the church, Christ’s Spirit is driven
out. This may be a strong statement to make, but let me back it
up with some observations on the feminine scene. Feminism is characterized
by several attributes, they may not consciously be present in
every feminist but, nevertheless, they motivate modern women to
leave their traditional role of mother and wife and become what
God never intended them to be.
The first and most apparent characteristic of feminism is a desire
for supremacy. Feminists want to be noticed, to be included, to
be prominent, to be supreme, to be influential, to be all powerful.
All of these traits originated with Satan who, not being content
with his position in heaven, desired to be like God, in effect,
to dethrone Him and take His place, to receive homage and worship
from the angels.
When these attribute are observed in individual, we can be assured
that they are following Satan rather then Christ. But what about
Christ. Consider this scripture, “Let this mind be in you,
which was also in Christ Jesus: who, being in the form of God,
thought it not robbery to be equal with God, but made himself
of no reputation, and took upon him the form of a servant, and
was made in the likeness of men: and being found in fashion as
a man, he humbled himself, and became obedient unto death, even
the death of the cross,” Philippians 5:5-8
Now, I ask you, have you ever seen a humble feminist? Have you
ever seen or heard of a feminist who desired the lowest place?
Do you know any feminist who desires to be made in the likeness
of MAN? The answer, to these questions, is, “of course not.”
Any woman, who desires to be a feminist, therefore, cannot be
a Christian. The two are diametrically opposed to each other.
Any woman who harbors feminist tendencies, has already given up
her hold on eternity, for Christ says to women, as well as to
men, “Let this mind be in you.” How can I or my wife
be a feminist if, at the same time, we desire Christ’s mind
to be in us, for His mind was a submissive mind, a humble mind,
a mind that was willing to step aside, to go to the lowest depths
that He might rescue sinners.
And what is the goal of feminists, for what purpose do they crave
their power and influence? Is it to do good, is it to rescue people
perishing in their sins? No! They aspire to authority for purely
selfish motives. Therefore, feminists can never enter the kingdom
of heaven, just as Satan will never again set foot there.
Before going on, let me remind you that feminists, like any other
sinner, can repent. However, a repentant feminist is no longer
a feminist, therefore, my statement, that feminists can never
enter heaven, is true. They never will.
When, as Christian men, we meekly step aside and allow women,
with a feminist leaning, to usurp our rightful position within
the church or family, then we receive the frown of God, not His
approval. God placed men in leadership responsibilities, in the
home and church, and He insists that we fulfill this position,
relying on His strength, wisdom, and guidance.
The Bible is quite clear about the position of women in the church,
they are to remain quiet and lean from their husbands. No woman
should ever be permitted to preach, to serve as deacons or elders,
or to lead worship. They have a role in the church and that role
is to encourage their younger sisters to be good and honorable
wives and mothers. The older women should set an example, for
the younger women, of submission to their own husbands, to respect
and reverence them and to fulfill their role as mothers. If they
do those things, that God commands, then they will be to busy
to desire any thing else.
But the reason that this situation exists, does not lay so much
with women, as it does with men. We have abrogated our leadership
role to our wives, within our own families, for so long, that
it becomes natural for us to abrogate our leadership position
within the church to any one who desires it, and women are eager
and willing to fill the vacuum created by cowardly and lazy men.
We must reform, and this reformation should begin in our homes
and with our own wives. Christ desires us to model His character
of love to our families. We must lead them as He guides us, softly
and tenderly, as they are able to bear and follow. Tenderness
and mercy should characterize our home rule, cherishing our wives
and children as Christ adores and cherishes us.
When we do this, both at home and in the church, we manifest the
spirit of Christ and the contrast, between our godly behavior
and the behavior of feminists, will be clear for every one to
see and appreciate. It is in this manner that we are to exercise
our leadership responsibilities and authority. It is in this fashion
that we must rebuke the feminists among us and forbid them from
polluting the house of God with their evil character and attributes.
The only leadership principal, that Christ recognizes and approves,
is the principal of love and submission. Just as Christ submitted
to His Father, so men are to defer to Christ, while women are
to bow to their own husbands, and children are to accede to their
parents. (Parenthetically, speaking, animals are also to surrender
to man, and not man to the animals. Therefore, in Christ’s
kingdom, there is no room for animal rights enthusiasts.)
It is time for men to reassert, albeit, in agape, our masculine,
God-given role of leadership in the home, the family, and the
church. Husbands, cherish your wives, as Christ adored the church,
and gave Himself for it, ought to be our motto.
May the Lord Bless you, your brother in Christ.
Allen A. Benson