They say opinions are like noses (OK,OK, but this is a family site, remember?), everybody has one. Here's mine, from a decidedly Redneck Point of View . . .

The topic today is The Paula Jones Case. The Redneck is totally confused now!

For several years now, men have had to walk around the office on tippy-toes, afraid they would do or say something that might in some way be taken as offensive by any woman within earshot (or gossip-shot). Now that Slick Willy is accused of dropping his pants in front of a clerk, suddenly it's not sexual harrassment? What's going on? Clarence Thomas was accused of making a one-liner (not in good taste, I'll admit, but still just a one-line sick joke!) and he is hounded after several years, but Billy-boy can drop his drawers and make an obsene request and it's not sexual harrassment?

I guess everybody's heard that Paula Jones' case against Bill Clinton was dismissed. The judge said that if it was true, it was "boorish and offensive", but not sexual harrassment. OK, OK, so will somebody please tell me (and every other man out there) WHAT IS SEXUAL HARRASSMENT? Where is that line that we're not supposed to cross? I've seen guys get into trouble for talking to a female co-worker - because another female co-worker didn't like what they were talking about! And she was 50 feet away! All I can say is "good hearing!"

Look, I've said it before and I'll say it again - I really don't care about Clinton's sex life, aside from the question about whether Big Macs are really aphrodisiacs. What concerns me is that there seems to be several different definitions of sexual harrassment, depending on who you are and who wants to mess up your life. If you're a common man, then any slightest hint that a molecule of testosterone is in your bloodstream is sufficient to get you executed in front of a firing squad, but if you get elected to President and the Femi-Nazis like you, then you have to rape and torture a dozen orphans before full view of the U.S. Supreme Court and submit a signed confession!

Folks, that's WRONG! The law is the law for everybody! I think what we need is a full written resolution by both houses of Congress stating exactly what is and is not sexual harrassment! I for one am gonna call every congressman I can get ahold of and demand it! If enough other folks do it, too, we might actually figure out exactly what it is!

So I'm gonna do something that I don't normally do - Everybody out there call your congressmen! Tell 'em that we demand a resolution on what constitutes sexual harrassment! Tell 'em we're tired of trying to obey a law that nobody knows how to obey! Tell 'em to get off their gluteus maximus and start protecting the public like they were hired to do! And don't forget, tell 'em to write it so we can read it! Easy on the legal mumbo-jumbo!

Oh, one more thing - is it just a coincidence that this judge was from Arkansas? Maybe we need to change the phrase "Something's rotten in Denmark" to "Something's rotten in Little Rock"!