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The Story Until Now...
Can it possibly be that our little group has been around for three years? And that our web page has been on-line for two years? (OK, you'd never know that since I keep bungling and resetting the coutner inadvertantly!) It that time, we've grown, changed, matured, regressed and had a lot of good old fashioned fun.
As we move forward into a new era--the era of the Generations of Bearden UMC, we want to take a few moments to look back at the wild and wacky history that's mad us the group we are today. So, please spend a few moments looking around and enjoying the Histroy of The Generations. (I kind of wish Orson Welles was stil around to read that last part in a big booming voice! Maybe we can get Charlton Heston...)
June 1996
The college and careers class meets for the first time in the sanctuary! Debby, Mandy, Michael,
and Marilyn attend. Debby tells the story of her trip to the Lost Seas where she manages to break her
wrist in seven places!
July 1996
Our first ever meeting! Mandy and Marilyn sing lots of folk songs together as Michael bores
everyone to tears with dull stories about Value-Ware. During this time, we institute the first of several
"inner child nights" which include such things as re-runs of Scooby Doo, coloring books, Play-Dough, pixie sticks,
and bendie straws. The famous annoucement that a member of the group can "fit my whole fist in my mouth" is made. Many
members are still shocked and amazed by this turn of events. Mandy tells the world famous "no-thumbs" story for the first time.
Debby breaks her arm for the second time that summer--this time getting our a sleep matress for one of the kids
at Tates Summer Day Camp. She will have to have this cast replaced when she heroically dives into the pool
to save a child later that week.
August 1996
Cindy sets land speed record to Maryville as we go on out first ever road trip to the
world's largest Wal-Mart! Michael proclaims that he can't imagine that heaven is much better than this
the Wal-Mart and buys the infamous Monty Pyhon's Contractual Obligation Tape which includes such skits as
"The Lesson of Saint Victor," "Finland," and "Farewell to John Denver." Hilarity ensues on the way home
as we laugh ourselves silly over the tape. Cindy also makes the mistake of taking this wild crew to Dairy Queen,
where we proceed to embarass ourselves and everyone else in the restaurant.
September 1996
At long last, football is back. Tara makes her first visit to Knoxville for the Memorial
Day weekend. Things go well for the Vols, that is, until we play Florida at home and lose. Michael is depressed
for weeks afterwards, though the Redskins eight game winning streak cheers him up just a bit. The tradition of
going out to lunch each Sunday after church begins with a trip to Buddy's Barbeque. A woman in line behind
Michael and Marilyn proclaims, "That's a lot of fudge cake," after Marilyn orders one.
October 1996
After a long summer of waiting and wondering, The X-Files is back. Michael has a season
premire party at his apartment and threatens to shoot anyone who talks during the show. Also during this
time, the group begins to use e-mail for regular talking to one another. John makes his first visit to the
group and, amazingly, continues to come back.
November 1996
Thanksgiving rolls around. Star Trek: First Contact hits the movie screens. Bob and the Webb High School football team roll into the state
championship game. Debby, Cindy, and Marilyn make several road trips to see Bob play. Michael sees Bob on TV
standing behind the coach of his team. Jeff makes his first visit to the group. Thanksgiving is spent together at Cindy's house. Marilyn has stayed up
all night working with Jeff at the Greeve Hall desk and is a bit punchy. Bob learns that sometimes asking questions can
lead to embarassing consequences.
December 1996
We celebrate the holidays together. Tara returns for a week long visit. The group has a white elephant gift exchange. Only stipulation:
All gifts must be under five bucks! Michael, Debby, and Tara raid the dollar store for gifts for the Young Singles gift exchange. John
gets truely creative and brings a bag of Ramen Noodles (the single guy's favorite meal right after Kraft Macaroni and Cheese!)
to exchange. Michael is still working on eating them. Marilyn, Michael, and John, all make trips home for the holidays. Michael
sends a "racy" postcard to Bob at his house in Maryville. Hilarity ensues when Bob's dad can't figure out if the postcard is for
him or not! Michael continues his tradition of watching National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation with the group and shocks everyone
by knowing all the dialogue. The movie is almost ruined by some people who point out that some of the things occurring could
never really happen, thus ruining the humerous value of some of them.
January 1996
Once again, UT wins the Citrus Bowl, defeating Northwestern. The young singles is chosen at one of the top six things that happened at Bearden in 1996! The whole gang is asked to be chaperones for the big youth
retreat, Resurrection, in Gatlinburg. However, it turns out that the chaperones end up acting up more than the youth do. The group runs
around going, "Rule #3! You're violating Rule #3!" all weekend long. 
(Rule three refers to not saying anything rude or derogatory or sarcasatic
to each other!) On this retreat, the famous "Prime Rib Incident" occurs. Some of the youth have run out of money and are scraping up
money for a meal on Saturday night as Michael, John, Lane, and Larry Masters sit in the lobby restuarant having their fill of all you
can eat prime rib. Michael and John give thanks to higher powers for the ability to use credit cards. We have our Super Bowl/Jeff's birthday
party. Green Bay wins the Super Bowl and Michael is upset because all the post-game stuff delays the start of X-Files.
February 1997
It's our own retreat, Celebration!! We all pile into the vans and head up to Gatlinburg for a weekend of fun
and excitement with Steve Varro, Christian Illusionist. Here the group meets several new friends from East Tennessee State University. Brian
is introduced to the group. Marilyn has Brian rolling on the floor with laughter at her use of the Monty Python voice. E-mail
addresses are exchanged among group members. Michael delivers his famous wrap-up to the members of Bearden about the trip, and includes
such phrases as "...and buttered scones for tea," to which no one laughs. Andy visits the group for the first time.
March 1997
Michael designs the T-shirt and promises they will be done by Easter. The gang goes over to Travis and Tish's house for an
Easter egg hunt. We're not quite sure if we found all the eggs because Travis did a pretty good job of hiding them. The Lady Vols win
their fifth national championship and their second in a row. There is great rejoicing.
April 1997
Softball practice begins. Due to the great interest, Bearden fields two teams--the Alpha and the Omega. Cindy tries to retire
from softball. Even though Easter has now come and gone, Michael promises that there will be T-shirts some day.
May 1997
Road trip to the Tennessee Aquarium! While there, Marilyn speculates on whether or not the fish like each other, if they
know we're watching them, and other important philosophical questions of life. Debby returns from Columbia College for the summer with a new
injury, this time to her knee. Jen, who has attended the group in the past, becomes a
regular member in hanging out and having fun. Courtney visits for the first time and is, surprisingly enough, not frightened away by our
antics. Michael once again imposes the dome of silence for the season finale of the X-Files.
Bob gives his chapel talk. Michael, Marilyn, Cindy, and Debby show up to embarass Bob. It works.
Michael still promises that the T-shirts will be done in the near future.
To Be Continued on the Next Page!
Last Updated September 8, 1998
Bearden United Methodist Church
4405 Sutherland Ave
Knoxville, Tennesse
e-mail: bearden@icx.net
Web Page: http://user.icx.net/~bearden
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