Archmage - MIT Application
April 18, 1994
Mr. John T. Mongan
123 Main Street
Smalltown, California 94123-4567
Dear John:
You've got the grades. You've certainly got the PSAT scores.
And now you've got a letter from MIT. Maybe you're surprised.
Most students would be.
But you're not most students. And that's exactly why I urge you
to consider carefully one of the most selective universities in
America. The level of potential reflected in your performance is
a powerful indicator that you might well be an excellent
candidate for MIT. It certainly got my attention!
Engineering's not for you? No problem. It may surprise you to
learn we offer more than 40 major fields of study, from
architecture to brain and cognitive sciences, from economics
(perhaps the best program in the country) to writing.
What? Of course, you don't want to be bored. Who does? Life
here *is* tough *and* demanding, but it's also *fun*. MIT
students are imaginative and creative - inside and outside the
classroom. You're interested in athletics? Great! MIT has more
varsity teams - 39 - than almost any other university, and a
tremendous intramural program so everybody can participate.
You think we're too expensive? Don't be too sure. We've got
surprises for you there, too.
Why not send the enclosed Information Request to find out more
about this unique institution? Why not do it right now?
Sincerely,
Michael C. Benhke
Director of Admissions
P.S. If you'd like a copy of a fun-filled, fact-filled
brochure, "Insight," just check the appropriate box on the form.
May 5, 1994
Michael C. Behnke
MIT Director of Admissions
Office of Admissions, Room 3-108
Cambridge MA 02139-4307
Dear Michael:
You've got the reputation. You've certainly got the pomposity.
And now you've got a letter from John Mongan. Maybe you're
surprised. Most universities would be.
But you're not most universities. And that's exactly why I urge
you to carefully consider one of the most selective students in
America, so selective that he will choose only *one* of the
thousands of accredited universities in the country.
The level of pomposity and lack of tact reflected in your letter
is a powerful indicator that your august institution might well
be a possibility for John Mongan's future education. It
certainly got my attention!
Don't want Bio-Chem students? No problem. It may surprise you
to learn that my interests cover over 400 fields of study, from
semantics to limnology, from object-oriented programming
(perhaps one of the youngest professionals in the country) to
classical piano.
What? Of course you don't want egotistical jerks. Who does? I
*am* self-indulgent *and* over confident, but I'm also amusing.
John Mongan is funny and amusing - whether you're laughing with
him or at him.
You're interested in athletes? Great! John Mongan has played
more sports - 47 - than almost any other student, including
oddball favorites such as Orienteering.
You think I can pay for your school? Don't be too sure. I've
got surprises for you there, too.
Why not send a guaranteed admission and full scholarship to
increase your chance of being selected by John Mongan? Why not
do it right now?
Sincerely,
John Mongan
P.S. If you'd like a copy of a fun-filled, brochure, fact -filled
"John Mongan: What a Guy!" just ask.
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