Gunds Pronounced "Gooond", these popular little pets do not naturally occur in the wild due to their slow, sedate nature. Baby gunds typically move at a snail's pace, uttering, "Gund", "Snuff", or "I'm so fat!" Looking at baby Gunds, they move slowly, are extremely plump and tender, and have no natural defenses, earning their nickname "Meals On Wheels". As a result, in the one misguided experiment when Gunds were re-released into the wild in an attempt to "free them" and "give them a better life", they were believed to have been decimated by vicious squirrels. At any rate, they did not come back. Baby Gunds typically grow on large Gund ranches, where dozens of these little bears wander around in a fenced corral, constantly bumping into each other ("Oof.") in spectacular displays of low speed collisions, or foraging for food ("When's lunch? Gund!"). Baby Gunds come in many delicious flav- er, colors, and range from a snowy white, to a delicate pink, to a cocoa-colored brown. One light, coffee-colored Gund has even been observed in Baltimore, owned by Charmaigne Leung. Gunds are soft, cuddly, and easy to take care of, although they have a tendency to sometimes get underfoot when you walk around ("Ooof, I feel flat!"), and constantly beg you for food. Highly recommended as a household pet. |
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