Chapter 11

Eleven

well there's two
two trains a runnin
but there's none Lord
that's going my way

Greg woke up, for a minute unsure of where he was; a glance at the face laying next to him refreshed his memory. He looked at the clock on the dresser and seeing that it was 5:35 am, wondered if he was going to be able to make it through the day on a few hours of sleep. He leaned over and kissed Stacy's cheek, running his hand down her side and hip, then sat up and began to get dressed. She spoke to him in a half-asleep whisper. "You have to go already?"
"Yeah, I need to go home and get ready for work."
She moved across the bed and put her arm around his shoulder from behind and kissed him. "Your reality exceeded my fantasy. I hope you'll help me live out some more sometime."
"I think that could be arranged." He thought of something. "How long have you had this?" He touched the top of her pelvic bone, where a small tatoo of a dolphin was.
"Oh, for awhile. A drunken college thing."
"It was hard not to notice. I was just curious." He finished getting dressed and got up to go. She stood up and they held each other for a minute, her head on his shoulder. Then she looked at him and ran her hand through his hair. "Think about me, OK?"
He kissed her and pulled her tight against his body. "It would be difficult not to." After Greg left, Stacy laid back down on the bed and let out a deep breath. She wondered why Greg, of all the men she knew, made her feel like she should give up the fast life and settle down.

When he got home, he started a pot of coffee and listened to his answering machine. The first message was from his boss. "Greg, you and I are going to lunch tomorrow, so wear a tie. I'll talk to you in the morning." That helped him pick out his wardrobe for the day. The other message was from Maggie. "Hey, just thought I'd call to see how you were. Where are you? Getting into trouble? Talk to ya later." Oh geeze, Greg thought. He went to take a shower.

Mr. Wallace waited until they had ordered to get into what he wanted to talk to Greg about. "I was sorry to hear about you and Jill. Are you coping OK?"
"Yeah, I'm handling it pretty well, I think. My friends are really helping me. Thanks."
"I don't want anything to affect your work Greg. You've really done a lot for the company and we wouldn't want to see you do anything crazy."
"I'd never let my personal life affect my work. I can separate the two."
"My niece Amy isn't seeing anyone at the moment, maybe I could put a good word in for you. You remember Amy, right?"
Greg did. She was cute and had a fabulous body, but she was a little bit too snobby for Greg's taste. All that time in the Hamptons, he thought. He smiled. "Oh yes, I remember her. Lovely girl. I don't think I'm ready for a date at the moment though. But thanks for thinking about me."
"Well, OK, but you let me know if change your mind. Now, what I really wanted to talk to you about was how we might expand our product line."

Greg went home at 3:30; he told Tracy to say he wasn't feeling well. He laid down on the bed and wondered if not having Jill around was going to be more exhausting than having her here and then he fell asleep within 5 minutes of closing his eyes. He awoke at 7:30, and figured he might as well pre-empt all distractions. He called Maggie, and was surprised she was home. "Hi there."
"Whatcha been doing? I've been wondering where you've been."
"Had to work late." Greg wondered why he felt like he needed to lie to her. "I fell asleep last night after Jill was here. Didn't even hear the phone ring when you called."
"I'm working at 9, want me to stop in before I do?"
"Not tonight. I'm probably gonna eat and go to bed."
"OK, well maybe I'll see you this weekend."
"Sure, you probably will. I don't have any plans at this point."
When he finished with Maggie, he dialed Stacy's number, but she wasn't home. He left a message on her machine, then decided to fix something to eat for himself.

On the day of Maggie's recital, he took the car, so that he could go straight from work. He arrived with time to spare, and decided to get something to eat before it started. He found a little deli and sat down with a paper to unwind. After killing a half-hour, he made his way back to the hall, and milled around in the lobby for a bit. He finally made his way in and found a seat about halfway down with about five minutes to spare. He looked over the program, until the house lights dimmed and when the curtain arose, he looked for her on the stage. He spotted her--third from the end, she was arranging her music in front of her as the concertmaster gave the cue for them to begin; he focused on her as she played, watching her intense facial expressions. He wasn't much of a judge of musicianship, but thought she had a delicate style.
The reception was in the lobby after the recital, so Greg waited for her to come out. He decided to walk outside for a minute and smoke, and noticed a man selling flowers near the street. He made his way down and decided on a small boquet of carnations. He went back into the lobby, trying to be inconspicuous with the flowers. He got a drink from the bar, and stood near several people who were talking. He listened to them discuss the playing and how impressed they were with the selections that had been chosen. Greg scanned the room, looking for any sign of the musicians coming out. He finally saw her emerge from a side door, and made a circling move around the room, coming up from behind her. "Very lovely. And your playing was nice too."
She turned and reached up to hug him. "I wondered if you ran off. Thank you."
"Oh no, I wouldn't run off on you after all that wonderful music." He held out the flowers for her. "Here, I stole these from a woman over on the other side of the room."
She beamed. "They're beautiful. I hope she doesn't miss them." She kissed him on the cheek.

Stacy called him the next night. "Let's go to Atlantic City this weekend." Greg thought about it for a bit, then decided he could think of a lot worse ways to spend a weekend than alone with Stacy. "Sure, I don't see why not. You wanna go right after work on Friday?"
"Yes. I already made a reservation for us."
"Oh, you were so sure I was gonna say yes?"
"Wishful thinking, I suppose. I can come over now, and we'll figure out the details."
Greg wondered if he was playing with fire, but in the end, he said yes. She showed up 20 minutes later, dropping her purse next to the door and slipping out of her shoes before giving him a long kiss. "Have you thought about me?", she whispered.
"I told you it would be hard not to."
She pushed him back until he was sitting in the chair with her straddling his legs. "I want to tell you something. It's important you know what I'm thinking about."
"This sounds serious."
"It is. You see, when I was little, my father left home one day for work and never came back. I've never heard from him since. Eventually, my mother met a really nice guy and remarried, but as much as he gave me, treated me like his own child, I really never got over how my father left us. Obviously I'm speaking from a professional point of view here. Promiscuity is a telling sign of someone looking for love they feel they never got at home. I'm not a kid anymore, and I wonder about whether it's time to grow up. Sometimes I think that maybe I'm better off not being with anyone, but in my heart, I know I want to settle down and have a family. I know this is a lot to throw at you right after everything that's happened, but I can't let you think that I'm just out for some meaningless sex, and in a couple of weeks everything will go back to the way it was."
Greg could see her eyes get glossy and pulled her closer to him. "Shhhh, it's OK Stace." He stroked her hair. She made no sound, but he could feel her tears moisten his shirt. Neither of them spoke for a long time. She sniffed and looked up at him, her eyes red. "You have to be the one Greg. For a week, I haven't gone to sleep without doing this. Hell, I haven't cried this much since I was a child." She sort of laughed, and he kissed her on the forehead. "I don't want any other man to hold me. I don't want anyone else. Period."
He wiped away a tear on her face with his thumb. "There's a lot of stuff to come to grips with here, but if you feel this strongly about it, I can't just pretend like it's not happening. I don't know what kind of unresolved issues I have, but I don't think I can let an opportunity pass when you have feelings this deep. Let's take it one step at a time. First we'll deal with tonight, then the weekend, and then go from there, OK?"
She nodded. She wiped her eyes with the back of her hand, then put an arm around his shoulder and leaned in. "Let's deal with tonight then."

He stopped by Maggie's apartment the next evening on the way home from work, and she let him in. On the way up the stairs, he felt like he was going to be sick to his stomach; he didn't want to do this, but he knew he couldn't leave her hanging around if he was going to be true to Stacy. She kissed him as he came in. "This is a surprise. What's up?" He led her to the couch and sat down. "We have an understanding, right?"
"We do."
He told her about Stacy, omitting the parts about spending the night with her. He assured Maggie that this was not something he expected. Her calm understanding masked her disappointment, but she always knew that this was a possibility, and she told Greg that she appreciated his candor. "You're a great guy, never let anyone tell you different. We can still be friends right?"
"Absolutely. You'll never know how much you've meant to me in a short period of time." He held her hand. "No one can take away the feeling I have for you. I wish that things had been different."
She squeezed his hand with affection. "Me too. I hope things work out for the best. Really." She smiled and they walked to the door. After they kissed, and he had started out, she stopped him. "No regrets Greg. We've helped each other through a rough time, more than you'll ever know." She closed the door and leaned against it with her head. "Damn."

Chapter 12 1