Planet of the Apes

Marky Mark and the Monkey Bunch. Hahahaha, I know that joke has been done to death but it's still funny!

Before I start this review a bit of background is in order. As anyone who knows me can attest, I like monkey movies. When you combine the entertainment found in movies with the natural amusement value found in primates you can end up with something wonderfully weird. Plus, I've seen Planet of the Apes and all it's subsequent sequels and have even read Pierre Boulle's original novel. This means that was more than prepared, more prepared than any sane person should be at any rate, to watch Tim Burton's retelling of Planet of the Apes.

Apes have, invariably, had a symbolic meaning that parallels the story they are in. Boulle's novel reads like a 1950's science fiction novel where human apathy leads to it's eventual fall. It's the sort of story where robots or some other form of artificial life would usually take over as the dominant species but since it's a French novel it has to be something absurd so it's apes. With the earlier Ape outings the apes were mostly used to discuss the racial and social issues of their times. The symbolism could become overdone, when you have guys running around in ape suits it's hard to be subtle, but the Ape films always had their heart in the right place. The apes and the humans seemingly manage to enslave each other every other movie to so there was never a shortage of social inequality to comment on, plus when you see Charlton Heston tell a young monkey not to trust anyone over thirty you know you're watching a seriously skewed piece of social commentary.

For further discussion on this idea you should read Planet of the Apes as American myth: race and politics in the films and television series by Eric Greene. It's a well put together discourse on the themes that run throughout the Apes films and is an interesting read in a film geek sort of way.

While Burton's interpretation of Apes looses the heavy-handed social commentary it's still just as goofy, if not goofier, than anything that has preceded it. The movie opens with an actual chimpanzee in a space suit trying to pilot a simulation of a space capsule. Any film that starts out with a monkey astronaut is okay in my book. After that the film tosses it's main character, astronaut Leo Davidson [Mark Wahlberg] into a space storm, has him run into Kris Kristofferson and a group of sentient apes who are slightly less hairy than Mister Kristofferson, has him wind up getting captured and serving fruit at a simian dinner party all within the first fifteen minutes. Oh yeah, now that's an opening!

I've always had an odd sense of respect for Tim Burton. The first time I see his films I am often struck by their problems and it's only upon reflection that I realize that there is some brilliant things to be found in most all of his movies. Few directors out there create movies that look and feel as distinctive as Tim Burton's movies. Burton's style feels like reality that is both built upon and stripped down where even the darkest events have a sympathetic edge to them. Nobody else makes movies that have such the distinctive look that Burton brings to his projects. While Apes didn't have the immediate visual hook that some of his other movies have had, I doubt there are many other directors who would be so appropriate for directing a movie starring sentient monkeys.

I'm not sure who decided on the character of Leo Davidson or who decided to cast Mark Wahlberg but it was a terrific decision. As the movie develops it turns out that not only did Davidson doom the crew of his ship and it's descendents, he caused the destruction of the entire human race. This is a massive, horrifying weight to ponder and Wahlberg is completely unconvincing in expressing the emotions one would expect to have when struck with that sort of idea. Come to think of it, I'm not even sure he even understood the magnitude of the cosmic fuck-up he has caused. For most of the movie he seemed content to stare blankly ahead while wearing clothes that are so carefully torn that they look as if it's some sort of retro fashion statement and that he pulled them out of the closet from back in the days when he was known as Marky Mark. Really, he looked most convincing serving people dinner. Normally this would be a detriment to the film but since people will inevitably compare [even though they shouldn't] the lead of this Ape film with the scenery chewing of Charlton Heston they needed to find someone who was just as poor an actor as old Chuck. In Mark Wahlberg they found that man. Before this film came out I was convinced that only Johnny Depp could pull off the role of the lead human [the man seems willing to play any role as long as it's strange enough, plus he's already worked with Burton] but Depp could never pull off the John Agar thousand yard stare that comes as second nature to Wahlberg.

Since the lead human is so blah the audience's attention is drawn to the apes. Really, who goes to see an Ape movie for the human cast anyway? The apes were a work of art, managing to look realistic, unbelievable, and ridiculous all at the same time. Ambling about in rolling mosey or scampering about on all fours when they get excited the apes moved as well as they looked. Plus, the characters let out the best "ook ook" noises I've ever heard. There's something great about having a character speaking fluent, intelligent dialogue while simultaneously sniffing someone or while swinging from the ceiling. Not only are the more primitive traits of the characters entertaining, it's infectious as well. After seeing the movie it took everything I had to keep me from hooting like a gibbon at everyone I saw, be the person friend, family, or the guy working behind the counter at the place where I had dinner.

Even though I can't guess what species of primate she was supposed to be, Ari [Helena Bonham Carter] is the main ape who's sympathetic to the plight of the humans. Decked out in a Jennifer Aniston hair-do, she ends up forming a corner in the love triangle that develops between her, Davidson, and jungle babe Daena [Estella Warren.] This monkey/man sexual tension played a significant part of the original book so I'm glad to see it's back, especially since it's so fundamentally silly. One would expect that a movie that hinted at inter-species romantic feelings would create some unpleasant feelings in the audience. Instead, Davidson was such a bore that my main complaint was that I couldn't figure out what either of the girls saw in him.

Taking a boring lead, a story that is unashamed about it's level of cheesiness, a surprise ending that doesn't make a lick of sense, and lots and lots monkeys and you have a very fun flick. It's not great, but none of the Apes movies are either. Still, in the genre of monkey movies the re-telling of Planet of the Apes is a most worthy addition.

Questions, comments, and bananas can be sent to gleep9@hotmail.com. If you're done grooming and picking for lice here, swing on back to either the Third Movie or Main page.

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