Joe Boo's Weird Celebrity Encounters
This is a collection of some of my past encounters with pulbic figures.
Before you read this, let me note one near-miss encounter, where I missed
an opportunity to talk to the heavenly Julie Delpy at Jerry's
Deli in Beverly Hills. Anyway, here are my celebrity stories. I am also
collecting other people's celebrity
encounter.
If you have weird celebrity stories, then feel free to share it with me and I will put it on my page.
Sarah Michelle Gellar
After the press junket for "Cruel Intentions," I asked her politely to autograph the CD cover for the movie soundtrack. Normally, I refuse to get autographs after interviews, but hey, it's Buffy. As she took the CD cover she said to me, "You know what I hate about our new posters? The only place I can sign my name is on my breasts." As she handed me my cover, she smiled at me. Now is that flirting or what?
Social Affability Rating: A
Jennifer Lopez
It was after the 1998 MTV Music Awards, and I was walking really fast with
my head down through Universal City. I accidentally bumped into Ms. Lopez.
I apologized, and she smiled at me and said, "That's okay." I continued
walking really fast. Needless to say, I have yet to shower ever since that
experience.
Social Affability Rating: B+
Jewel
I met Jewel right before she exploded on the national music scene with the
hit album "Pieces of You." I went to a free concert she played at Tower
Records on Sunset. As I was in line to get her autograph, I said to my
friend Irena, "I think I'm going to try to strike up a conversation with
her." So I stood in line trying to think of a way to talk to her. It was
finally my turn to get her autograph. As she signed my album, I said, "You
know, we should party in Mexico sometimes." Now this might seem like a
completely random thing, but it wasn't. She told a story during her
performance of how the Mexican police gave her confiscated bales of
marijuana while she was vacationing in Cancun. Nevertheless, she was not
amused. In fact, she gave me the dirtiest look I ever got in my life, one
that was more effective than a restraining order. She just eyeballed me
as I walked out the door, and I could still feel her stare on my back.
Social Affability Rating: D-
Reggie White
One boring weekend, my brother, my dad and I were sitting around the house
doing nothing. For some unexplainable reason, I just said, "Let's go to
Green Bay." So we all got in the car and made the 3-4 hour drive to Green
Bay, Wisconsin, home of the Packers. We saw the Packers Hall of Fame, the
streets named after Packer greats, and finally Lambeau Field. As we were
driving by Lambeau, all of us started peering at the stadium. Obviously,
you cannot keep your eye on the road and Lambeau Field at the same time,
so we almost ran over three football players crossing the street, stopping
several inches from them. Two players kept walking, but one of them just
stood in front of my car. It was Reggie White, and he just stood there
with the most intense angry look I ever gotten from an ordained minister.
Anyway, we almost changed football history, which I find kind of neat.
Social Affability Rating: D-
Garry Shandling
It was during a Lakers-Pacers basketball game, and I was taking pictures,
illegally might I add, of the game. My friend Jeff told me, "Look, Garry
Shandling. Why don't you take a picture of him." So I went down to his
section, and I waited there to take his picture. I waited for a while, and
Jeff was wondering why I wasn't taking the picture. As soon as he got out
of his chair and turned around, I snapped a picture, and he was very
startled by the flash. He looked like a deer about to be run over by a
car, and he just stood there for a minute before he stared me down
with a look of concentrated venom and ambled his way to the
bathroom or somewhere like that.
Social Affability Rating: D
The Indiana Pacers
Only a couple of members to be exact. I was at the same game where I saw
Garry Shandling. When the players were exiting the court during
half-time, I went down to the tunnel and started yelling, "I love you
Dwayne." Dwayne was Dwayne Schintzus, a 7' German player who was somewhat
popular in San Antonio. Being the geek that I am, I was the only one who
knew him. When the players came back on the court, I yelled for Dwayne,
and when they exited after the game, I went down to the tunnel and started
yelling "I love you Dwayne" again. Suddenly, a couple of Pacer players and
fans stared at me. I was wondering why when somebody said, "You know what
he said? Meet me after the game." I was shocked but flattered. I'm not gay
or anything, but all I have to say is how many people were hit on by a
professional basketball player? 'Nuff said.
Social Affability Rating: B+
Paul Sorvino
First, the backstory. During the Braves-Yankees World Series, they showed
Henry Kissinger and Joe DiMaggio watching the game. I started doing an
imitation of Kissinger asking DiMaggio, "So, how was Marilyn Monroe in
bed? JFK wouldn't tell me." My roommates thought it was a pretty good
imitation. A couple of months later, me and a bunch of friends saw Paul
Sorvino at Jerry's Deli in Beverly Hills. Sorvino did an excellent job as
Henry Kissinger in Nixon. My friends tried to convince me to call
Sorvino using the telephones at the table and do my Kissinger imitation. I
picked up the phone and was ready to dial but I chickened out and I let
him eat in peace. I was about to ask why his daughter Mira was going out
with Quentin Tarentino, but I figured his two dinner companions, two
really burly guys, would beat my head in with the complimentary plate of
pickles, which for some reason Jerry's Deli stopped serving. I know
this was not a celebrity encounter, but it's a gives me a reason to tell
people I do a really good Henry Kissinger imitation.
Social Affability rating: NA
James Iha
I saw the guitarist for the Smashing Pumpkins at the Opium Den during a
post-concert party for the Verve. I needed
to walk past a crowd of people, so I tapped him on the shoulder and said,
"Excuse me." He said, "Oh, sorry," and let me pass. This is a really lame
story, but it makes a nice detour to my roommate Clay, who lives a couple
of houses away from James Iha's mother in Elk Grove, Ill. She's this
40-ish Japanese woman who talks to everyone and always requests a
song to be played at a Pumpkins concert. That request is always met, and I
think it's really cute James does that. By the way, her favorite
Pumpkins song is "Mayonaise," and she once demanded to Billy Corgan, "You
better play 'Mayonaise' Billy."
Social Affability Rating: B
Adam Sandler
My roommate and I went to see "She's So Lovely" in Westwood. We get to the
theatre with five minutes left before the movie when we were told the
movie was moved to another theater four blocks away. Neither of us were in
a good mood, and my roommate started yelling, "Shit! Fuck! Godammit! Fuck,
Fuck, Fuck!" A guy behind him quietly tapped him on the shoulder and said,
"Excuse me, are you buying a ticket?" It was Adam Sandler, and boy was he
scared. My roommate said,"Oh no, go ahead," and Sandler quickly bought a
ticket and got away from us. Anyway, my roommate scared the living shit
out of Adam Sandler and we made "She's So Lovely" on time.
Social Affability Rating: C-
Juliana Hatfield
I tagged along to a one-on-one Juliana Hatfield interview. As we were setting up our mike, the girl I went with asked me to test the mike. I held the mike, and I just stood there, not knowing what to say. Juliana said I should say the national anthem. So I put my hand over my heart and recited it, just like in 4th grade Juliana found it funny and let out a boisterous laugh. I thought to myself, "now that's what a sweet innocent laugh from a virgin sounds like." Then I realized she probably lost her virginity to Evan Dando, and that laugh didn't seem so wholesome afterward.
Social Affability Rating: B
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