Film is nominated for minor Oscars
Worth:-10
Reasons for deduction: Well, we don't know about you at this stage, but we are sick to death of hear things about how great Titanic really is because it won 11 Academy Awards (and something about some poof named Leo). But, inadvertently, if you read what they actually won then you will see that this category is necessary.
- Best Costume (any film that is made by Merchant Ivory is a dead set nomination even though they always wear the same costume, just washed three times and dry cleaned after every movie to make them look like new).
- Best Editing (Titanic - best editing. Hello! 194 minutes. Wake up will ya).
- Best Sound Effects (loudest movie - most explosions - best sound of water flowing - whatever).
- Best Special Effects (has to be an alien movie where the aliens still look like gorillagrams from the first Jaws movie)(Then there's that blue screen. Uh oh).
- Best Sound Effects Editing (huh!).
- Best Make-up (goriest face explosion - best scar - best slut - stop me when I hit a nerve).
- Best Cinematography (most scenes of sweeping plains - helicopter long shots - pure harshness of Mother Nature {a puddle of snow}).
- Best Comedy or Musical Score or Soundtrack (any album that can rip off as many 70's songs as possible - feature a kooky anthem that sticks in your head until you put a gun to it).
- Best Original (sic) Song (which "diva" can sing the most window crashing bullshit song - the waifest songstress).
- Best Dramatic Score (any score with a violin or piano playing the broken melody of lost love - awwwwwww!!!).
- Best Art Direction (the movie with the most props that hide the studio the best - who can find the most nostaglia looking stuff, even if it was made yesterday and looks like its from 2000 years ago).
- Well, Titanic won 9 of those, and we don't see anybody caring now do they.
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